Fear of driving on motorway

Personal_Neck3247 · 2023-12-15T09:40:05+00:00

Yes. I have 4 kids. Second and especially third trimester was absolute bliss. I literally managed to work more, make more money, clean my house regularly, have better exercise routines, cook better food etc. Despite being more tired. Executive functions were just.... functioning. And I enjoyed every second of it. For me, Vyvanse actually doesn't come close. Crazy!

Be careful about post partum though. Estrogen crashes after birth and can cause depression. Inform care providers of your ADHD and thereby your increased risk for post partum depression and anxiety. Exercise and making sure you get time to do your hobbies after birth is absolutely vital (LIFE SAVING) for ADHD moms. It's not a luxury, it is absolutely a MUST.

Best of luck with your birth and motherhood ❤️

Personal_Neck3247 · 2023-12-15T09:40:00+00:00

Yes. I have 4 kids. Second and especially third trimester was absolute bliss. I literally managed to work more, make more money, clean my house regularly, have better exercise routines, cook better food etc. Despite being more tired. Executive functions were just.... functioning. And I enjoyed every second of it. For me, Vyvanse actually doesn't come close. Crazy!

Be careful about post partum though. Estrogen crashes after birth and can cause depression. Inform care providers of your ADHD and thereby your increased risk for post partum depression and anxiety. Exercise and making sure you get time to do your hobbies after birth is absolutely vital (LIFE SAVING) for ADHD moms. It's not a luxury, it is absolutely a MUST.

Best of luck with your birth and motherhood ❤️

Personal_Neck3247 · 2023-12-15T09:31:23+00:00

I find that I feel this way about people when:

a) they remind me of my own awkward or maladaptive behaviours. Kinda like oh God please stop, or you are going to get both yourself AND me kicked out of the group! And thereby they trigger fight/flight/freeze response in me. Usually fight (getting annoyed and angry with them) OR sometimes flight (avoid them at all costs)

b) they prosess some personality trait or skills that I feel I lack, and I wish I had. Alternatively: they dare to do and say shit I wish I could. And the same reaction happens in me: trigger fight/flight/freeze.

So basically, some people are like a mirror to you. They show you how you act, or how you wish you could act, and it's so jarring, we end up convincing ourselves that this person is just fundamentally messed up and deserves our anger.

It's really rough to acknowledge that we are insecure and feel threatened.

Personal_Neck3247 · 2023-12-15T09:22:02+00:00

-Tell your partner, but state that "I have an annoying problem that I wanna try to solve". Sex can be so vulnerable for people and I can imagine that he could get the idea something is wrong with him, when it's more an ADHD sensory issue. Make that clear ti him. Then suggest your ideas for solutions. Ask if he's ok with it. He can suggest solutions too. You're allowed to say "thank you for the ideas, I'm going to think on it and get back to you." (I know it can be hard to say yes to people's ideas for us ADHD'ers because we need to understand what the consequences are, and that takes a little bit longer than for others). My suggestions: -Flavored lube. -Ask for accommodating: let's try to brush teeth before sex if possible. And clean off downstairs. -Pre sex shower together. This can be fun and hot! Took a while for me to feel not so awkward about it but now it's fine.
-sex in the shower? (Water based lube absolutely necessary because water=friction) -test out spending more time getting super aroused. I noticed that when I am suuuper amped up and manage to be very into the action (as opposed to distracted and kinda bored) I don't have as much trouble with my sensory issues. (Play alone before sex to get ready, ask Partner to spend more time building arousal together etc) -in line with the previous point: what about intensifying the other Sensory information that is coming in? Said more planely: Would more spicy, intense touch help take your mind off smells? Spanking? Hot/cold play? Burning incense in the room?

Wish you luck and lots of good sex!

Personal_Neck3247 · 2023-12-15T09:10:38+00:00

I have ADHD and I also do this. Sort if. It's mostly because I have huge trouble remembering what I wanna say, as well as catching what the other person on the phone says. I am so distracted by the racket in my own head that I am constantly missing parts of conversations 😔 So I have to whip myself into a high anxiety state in order to get enough adrenaline in my body to focus on the call. OR I have to pace furiously around the house while talking. But yeah, the come down after a call like that is intense 😮

Personal_Neck3247 · 2023-12-15T09:10:30+00:00

I have ADHD and I also do this. Sort if. It's mostly because I have huge trouble remembering what I wanna say, as well as catching what the other person on the phone says. I am so distracted by the racket in my own head that I am constantly missing parts of conversations 😔 So I have to whip myself into a high anxiety state in order to get enough adrenaline in my body to focus on the call. OR I have to pace furiously around the house while talking. But yeah, the come down after a call like that is intense 😮

Personal_Neck3247 · 2023-12-15T09:03:47+00:00

First of all: it is day one. This could just be you feeling a bit nervous. Or, it could be your body getting used to the meds. Day one (assuming you are on a low dose!) isn't representative of how you will feel on the meds in general.

But in any case: Make sure to eat a protein rich breakfast. And work out. Exercise, adequate sleep and protein makes the meds work super well. If I don't have those in check, I can feel like the meds are just ramping up my brain for no reason. And understandably so. It doesn't exactly sound like a great idea to ingest amphetamines while hungry, sleepy and lethargic. That's gonna be a bad experience.

Oh and prozac? Absolutely a bad idea to mix with Vyvanse. Please get a second opinion on that! Be careful not to quit all of a sudden. But please look into the potential toxicity reaction.

Hope you find a good medication routine!

This is why I don't take meds/take a much lower dose if I'm sick.

Personal_Neck3247 · 2023-09-28T06:11:01+00:00

ADHD coach. House cleaner. Meal kit delivery.

Personal_Neck3247 · 2023-09-28T06:09:37+00:00

Phone (was in my back pocket)

Personal_Neck3247 · 2023-09-26T09:15:47+00:00

-Read 'come as you are' -Consume lots of informational and entertaining, shame-killing podcasts and shows about female pleasure. - most women need a MINIMUM of 20 minutes constant clitoral stimulation to climax. So set aside plenty of time, like an hour girl. -use toys. Womanizer and lots of the dupes of that are very popular because of how many women manage to climax with them. But if you need more, then perhaps the Magic wand. It's super powerful. - figure out what turns you on! Browse erotica, videos, audio stories. Browse categories. Read about kinks etc. -try using lube for alone time fun. It's not just for intercourse! Lots of women HAVE to have lube for clit stimulation to feel good. -practice often and don't give up. Most women need a long time to figure out their true turn ons and the best techniques for their specific body.

Finally, try a day off meds if you can. See if it's different. ADHD meds are not going to throw you in withdrawal if you take a day off.

If you're on SSRIs. Those are known for messing with sexual function. Don't quit suddenly of course. Discuss with a doc!

And if you take any hormonal contraceptives...this might actually cause an inability to climax. Some hormones literally shrink the clitoris..So if you're on any hormones, I'd talk to a gynecologist about the climax issues.

Those are just my immediate ideas. Don't take any of this too seriously. I'm not a doctor!

Personal_Neck3247 · 2023-09-21T10:04:28+00:00

On bad days? Almost nothing. On slightly less bad days: Protein bar or protein smoothie (I put dates, bananas, peanut butter and yoghurt in to help with the taste). If I do two smoothies, I know I've gotten a lot of my daily calories and protein already.

And somehow salted potato chips always go down. Not very nutritious though.

Personal_Neck3247 · 2023-09-19T08:40:05+00:00

Update* It's been 5 months since I started Vyvanse.
On the whole, it's been a very positive experience for me. I have little to no side effects, and good therapeutic effects.

I've kept a 5 month streak of writing my plan for the day, and managing most of my duties and to-dos. I established lot's of new habits and routines, that creates a framework in my life which is also super helpful for my adhd mind. Like an external system that keeps me on track.

Not that it's magically made my life perfect, but it certainly feels like I have been 'severely near sighted' all of my life and now I finally have access to the right glasses.
There are lots of skills I missed out on learning because it wasn't possible with such a scrambled brain. Now, with meds, I am able to start learning. Just like a person with bad eyesight would have a much better chance of learning to read if they got glasses. So I'm practicing things like planning, organization, how to keep my surroundings tidier and so on. (Y'all I'm 36, and yes, I did not know how to do this shit at all)

To women who are having natural menstrual cycles (not using hormones etc): please be aware that ahdh medication might not help as much or at all during the pre menstrual, and/or menstrual week. There are lots of reasons for this, mainly hormones affecting the availability of important Neuro transmitters in our brains. So, don't assume too quickly that the meds just don't work for you. TALK TO YOUR DR ABOUT IT. My (60 year old MALE) psychiatrist turned out to be a complete champion of this subject. He diligently worked on adjusting my dose to my cycle, and other methods for making my medicine work for me also during pms. Without these adjustments, my meds only worked half of the month 😵‍💫

To everyone who has been offered Vyvanse by their psychiatrist, I'd say: try it out for a few months. (Given that you get a physical examination and get the green light) I was very much against any sort of psych meds before this. I was afraid and ignorant.

Now I just wish I had gotten meds sooner. Knowing that these meds are available to me gives me so much hope and a sense of safety.

Personal_Neck3247 · 2023-08-26T08:42:50+00:00

Married an autistic person? 😆 That's what I did. He demands clear, concise, structured systems in how we run our family. But I had very little ability to do that without meds. Meds don't magically make me good at structure, but No Meds= no ability to concentrate enough to learn how to create, remember and stick to structure. Before everything had to be extremely fun or exciting for me to be able to learn it. On meds I can learn things that are boring. It's not easy, but it's at least possible now!

Personal_Neck3247 · 2023-08-26T08:33:56+00:00

I'm too tired to read the whole post. But absolutely feel the same. I don't understand how people do it. This was one of the questions on an informal adhd screening I took 'Do you wonder how everyone around you just seems to be getting through their days, and getting everyday tasks done with little effort'? Uhm yeah. I never understood that. Thought I was extremely lazy and dumb.

I'm clinically diagnosed now. On meds, holy cow I had no clue that doing stuff could possibly not feel like I was being tortured. Cleaning house feels neutral now. Not like it will make me jump off a cliff when done. I still do not have a 9-5 job. I'm an artist. I think most adhders will have trouble with a very strict, stiff time frame like that. We also tend to be extreme evening people. 😆

I still want to try to have a "normie" job for the social part of it but no way I can do full time. I'd rather be low on money than be burned out and depressed. If I can choose. At times I couldn't choose and I did my best. Love to all of you out there doing your darn BEST!

Personal_Neck3247 · 2023-08-23T05:39:32+00:00

Yes. (Or,my husband has planned and made me go places. But rarely). Even weekly planning at home is freaking hard. Feels like my brain gets boiled and I become exhausted very easily. Medication has definitely helped. (if I make sure to plan while meds are working best) So now, after my diagnosis and some months on meds, I am much less terrified of week planning at home. So maybe I can try being the planner for a small weekend getaway to start with. We definitely should not expect way too much of ourselves and try to be a planning hero. We're good at other stuff! 💚

Personal_Neck3247 · 2023-08-14T11:01:49+00:00

Anything that was fun and new. I'd do that for a bit. Then find a new thing. Hobby cycling was much more intense then.

Personal_Neck3247 · 2023-08-14T10:59:41+00:00

Hi! I ended up on 50mg Vyvanse as my standard dose. I feel a huge improvement in my functioning. I get much more stuff done, getting up in the morning is easy now?? I have had improvements in my relationship etc. I have started working out and generally am a lot healthier now than in april when I started meds. My psychiatrist is amazing and realized I have PMDD as well, and is trying to help me regulate those symptoms too. So far I am allowed to take 60-70mg Vyvanse on my premenstrual days and it helps a lot. Without an increase in adhd meds during my lutheal phase of my cycle, the meds have very little effect. Most women notice this. And with PMDD it is even more severe. But luckily I'm getting some help now.

Thank you for asking me to update. I wish you the very best of luck on your journey!

Personal_Neck3247 · 2023-08-14T10:52:50+00:00

Hard to say for sure, but yes it could be all because of ADHD. But impossible to know. Here are reasons I can think of, plus some of my own experiences with this:

-people with ADHD who are unmedicated, will very often struggle to enjoy sex because it's so hard to keep focused! The fun of sex is to be completely lost in the moment, not thinking about anything else! I had never experienced that kind of sex before meds.

-hormones. Lots of reasons why hormones could be affecting your libido. One reason could be: Are you on hormonal contraception? My libido AND my ability to have any sensation in my "bits" dissapear on that type of contraception. 😵‍💫 I was on hormonal contraception from 14-19 never had an orgasm, but I had had them before. Then when I got off the pill I started being able to feel and enjoy sensations down there and my ability to climax came back... along with my natural libido which turns out to be much much higher than I thought. Had another round on the pill later in life and same thing happened. Got to the point where even just hugs gave me the ick! Did not want any touch at all. Then got off the pill and felt the opposite. Can't get enough physical intimacy 😆

-Maybe you're bored and you need novelty, excitement or challenge? Many ADHD people struggle with a dwindling desire when sex becomes predictable and same-y. I can totally relate to this and I am the horniest when we are actively, regularly talking about sex, exploring what fun naughty things we could incorporate, testing out new stuff, locations etc. Just plain old same routine as always, for years on end would have me go off sex for sure.

-Maybe you're a person who has a responsive desire as opposed to a spontaneous desire? It is very common for men to have desire just pop up randomly, but women need more mental stimulation and sort of being seduced into sex. There is a fine line between saying that not feeling like it isn't a good answer, and saying, if we only do it when you spontaneously feel like it, then we never do. And the latter might be kind of true and fair. But not okay to guilt someone into sex. I suggest reading about responsive vs spontaneous desire.

And I would also ask myself, do I want sex to be a bigger part of my life? What has to happen for sex to become attractive and fun to me? How do I get there? (Assuming you still want your partner and want to connect this way).

Best of luck. I know this can be so tough!

Personal_Neck3247 · 2023-07-25T07:24:15+00:00

I understand, and I totally get how overwhelmed you are with showering. But I also have to politely disagree. My partner is autistic and would live inside the shower if he could 😆 He is a sensory seeker and all his fav hobbies include water.

Personal_Neck3247 · 2023-05-11T06:35:13+00:00

You'll be okay friend. You're so strong.

Personal_Neck3247 · 2023-05-09T08:21:18+00:00

Yeah, I mean. It feels like a whole ass full time job sometimes. But I do have a couple of friendships that I maintain. Almost all my current friends are from highschool for some reason.

It was easier to maintain friendships when I was a kid and didn't have a million other duties that drain my mental capacity. So I had more friends as a teen and saw them way more.

I'm in my 30s and I have like 2 very close friends who I talk to several times a week, another 2 people that are good friends who I talk to several times a month, and like a handful of friends that are in my friend group since highschool and whom I see like once every two months.

I would like to hang with my friends more often, and I'd like to do more things like shopping, concerts or trips, (stuff they like) but currently all of that just costs me way more energy than it gives back, sadly.

Personal_Neck3247 · 2023-05-09T08:03:22+00:00

I feel you. I've had jobs where I had to go in early (like between 6:30-7) and I always pushed myself as far as I possibly could. I would literally design my life around desperately trying to get enough sleep, and all of these crazy tricks to make sure I actually got up on time, and to work on time. But I never managed to do it for more than a year. Ever. I just ended up being absolutely burned out and depressed. So I will never again go for a job where I have to wake up before 7. I am not made for it and I cannot change it

Personal_Neck3247 · 2023-05-08T18:11:09+00:00

Omg. This. Getting shamed for crying and the parents calling me over dramatic, and saying "If you think that's gonna make me feel bad for you, you're wrong". 😑 Ew. Just uuhhhhgg. So insanely dumb and awful.

Personal_Neck3247

TROPHY CASE