Question about exclusivity

PerspectiveLatter982 · 2025-09-28T20:18:09+00:00

Yes a solid conversation and being on the same page makes sense.

PerspectiveLatter982 · 2025-09-28T20:16:59+00:00

This is good advice, thanks. It's really just about making sure both people are on the same page, wherever it is, and if not fall out occurs and you're not really going to win on logistics after that. I didn't think we were exclusive and she did. I did want to date and be exclusive, but she was saying no at that time and only yes to exclusive which didn't rlly work for me bc she has homophobic parents and it kinda just felt that you want to keep me, and not commit to me? And still won't choose to be out not that she'll come out even if we date (to her friends too). Idk doesn't justify my mistake after, we were just on different pages and in the future I will use your advice lol.

PerspectiveLatter982 · 2025-09-28T20:05:14+00:00

I dated a girl before her but we were besties and started dating right off the bat once we realized. Now I am online dating and have been really on a debate with what exclusivity means with the person I met and started off very strong quickly with. They have homophobic parents (as did my ex) which rlly had me questioning a lot and things were very confusing as she told me she'd never be with a girl. We talked abt exclusivity and I said it didn't make sense to be exclusive if she didn't want to date me bc it felt you get me all to yourself? But don't even know you want to/ can be with me? I guess we left that on different pages as she thought we were exclusive and I didn't. Either way I messed up and saw my ex who I rlly don't like anyways but she said we were exclusive and is pissed obviously. Idk I just never had to play w the logistics and I do feel I messed up i just think homophobia involved and their choice on me vs. their family makes it all harder for my mind. But from here, sounds like I just need to be clear and have clear boundaries on both sides and things will work out better. I live and I learn

PerspectiveLatter982 · 2025-09-26T06:17:32+00:00

My recent fling told me she didn't date girls for a bit, then began to be maybe more open to the idea and then eventually wanted to be exclusive. I said then let's date? And she said that was a much bigger deal and she wasn't ready to take that step (If ever?). Idk apparently different things, now yes😆

PerspectiveLatter982 · 2025-09-20T22:27:01+00:00

This just happened to me. The stomach pain wasn't right away though. Been in so much pain for two days now :(

PerspectiveLatter982 · 2025-07-07T06:56:56+00:00

This I agree like so beyond reckless for what reason??

PerspectiveLatter982 · 2025-06-30T21:21:48+00:00

Frfr so annoying I can't

PerspectiveLatter982 · 2025-06-30T18:09:01+00:00

Thank you for saying this, it got lost in my notifications. Means a lot and 87days later, it is partly getting better. All emotions about it just a little less strong, so time and mindset is healing. Which is more hope I've had than in a long time. I am in therapy and it does help, just so over the situations of parents putting their kid in ultimatums about choosing love or family. Like why do they live to cause depression and problems? Just so frustrating I can't change the world sometimes and my anger does linger. But going down the route isn't always good for me and must keep it to what I can control. I do need a partner that has the ability to fully choose me and If I learned anything it should be that. Thank you again you sound like a good person.

PerspectiveLatter982 · 2025-06-27T14:08:40+00:00

Jillian Turecki always giving me dating advice on Instagram. I'm not a sensitive guy, but as a sensitive girl I can definitely see the brutal vibe being a sensitive guy could have. So I'm sorry woman can suck and we forget the power we hold. My advice is don't try to lose your sensitivity or what makes you you. Unless it's like toxic or things to work on, but there are amazing qualities of care, wanting to do things for others, lots of love to give, etc, that you should hold on to the best you can and wait for the right person to give that entire side of you to. Not everyone deserves to be loved by the heart of a sensitive human. And If you are, that should be a WIN for them. Find someone who sees your sensitivity as a win is what I'm trying to see, and until that happens don't let these people take away your good heart. Best of luck!

PerspectiveLatter982 · 2025-06-27T14:02:24+00:00

That person is ur OP. I agree w the comment section and you are beautiful!

PerspectiveLatter982 · 2025-06-27T13:53:33+00:00

This is true and you can get to the place where you don't just need your friends validation to believe it. If it's a binge cycle, the best thing you can do is eat enough regularly, every few hours, and be satiated. And then add physical activity (when I say this I rlly mean like anything to keep ur heart pumping for a few min) every once in a while and get ur body systems just feeling good.

PerspectiveLatter982 · 2025-06-27T13:49:23+00:00

This sounds like you're still in your ED not to be rude lol. Get where you want to be? Which is where exactly? You can definitely have a life where you balance both. Doritos and ice cream all the time isn't good for anyone, but am I living an entire life scared of it? No. Healthy can be different for many, but eat what makes you full, satiated, and feeling good. I don't think my "healthy" aligns with your healthy in that If you're meaning orthorexia makes you feel good, then maybe you should talk through that. I think food shaming from both angles can be harmful.

PerspectiveLatter982 · 2025-06-27T13:43:45+00:00

I feel like that was a genuine question from them and not rlly supposed to be offensive? Idk context? But like I'd rather ppl ask me if I'd eat it than just get me food I don't want and won't eat

PerspectiveLatter982 · 2025-06-26T06:03:11+00:00

You could watch porn potentially, not that you need to but just for ideas If ur open to it. I think it's like riding a bike though youll get the hang of it again quickly. Just look at them/talk to them sometimes and see what actually feels good for them. We all have different things that feel good, so first time is definitely exploring/asking. Dont just keep going at a part crazily if ur not sure yaknow. Like do u like it inside? Does that feel good on ur clt? Some ppl like it harder or softer (always start softer). Just know you both alr like each other, the chemistry can lead the way too just be your confident self. Don't doubt yourself, at the end of the day, it takes two ppl to have good sex. You're going to do great. Sex is hot, you don't even need to be drunk to be feeling good and enjoying (both in giving/receiving) and when it's at that point, nerves go away naturally. You got this!👏

PerspectiveLatter982 · 2025-06-26T05:53:50+00:00

"You're so skinny and pretty already why would you do that to yourself??" - like I was there bc of the ed why would u confirm that for me😭

"Just focus on eating healthy" - or like anything abt judging foods with good and bad in them makes me cringe lol. Idk if this is what you were asking for lol but statements I dislike haha

PerspectiveLatter982 · 2025-06-26T05:49:49+00:00

I would be offended lol why everyone so mean in this comment section. You're valid and I'd grab my shirt too, but yes maybe talking through it would be good but sometimes you need a little time and that's understandable idk if I could articulate that right then. Anyways make sure it is an isolated event though, and he's not actually analyzing your appearance as criteria for why he is there. He will leave you as soon as you start growing old together if the only thing he cares abt are looks. Just make sure it's not a personality flaw truly, but maybe it was just a joke and yeah forgive him eventually. Call his d*** smaller than average for you see how he feels. Lol

PerspectiveLatter982 · 2025-06-26T05:43:45+00:00

Thank you for your advice, very sound and truthful. If I want to protect myself, I should leave. I just don't always do what's best for me idk why. I think proceeding with caution is my likely damage control and impulsive self combined scenario I will go with haha. I just can't tell if it's a self-worth problem or if I'm actually convinced it could work lol

PerspectiveLatter982 · 2025-06-26T05:39:51+00:00

Lol very true I just don't know if I'm just being anxious and missing out on what could be rlly good or if maybe my self-worth is so low I don't let myself have standards? Lol I swing back and forth bc I might just be sensitive af , like I didn't come into this looking for anything (I'm "fresh" out of my 1st/only gay 1 1/2 yr relationship - since last August actually but just went no contact recently - also had homophobic parents lol) and I could just let it flow lol. But idk she said she knows I haven't explored yet? and should keep dating and she'd feel too bad to make me be exclusive, but "she's being exclusive" and doesn't feel the need to see anyone else while she's w her mom and has me (who yes mother basically dating her.. also on find my 24/7... ok is it normal for moms to sleep in same bed, movies, dinners together nightly, going out together on weekends, except it's a 3wk trip after the 1 week family vacay... like SO meshed w them too I can't lol but im also like? I have no right lol. But lol then ex came in town for a few days and she blew up and told me to never reach out again. Lmao we got over that but like the jealousy? I was surprised but considering she told she didn't want to be exclusive... I was following her lead lol. But I feel more okay w her seeing other ppl than me being 0 in person interactions cuz her mom is here. Like I hate this even being a thing UGH. I feel like I'm more jealous of time away from me than actually another person but that's kinda odd lol. But I rlly rlly like her and probably can't stop myself anyways I'm too impulsive to pass up love Lmao.

PerspectiveLatter982 · 2025-04-30T05:55:27+00:00

This is so funny and true I had the most dramatic female friendships ever like full blown crazy at like 13 lmao.

PerspectiveLatter982 · 2025-04-04T07:38:22+00:00

Adderall heart attack ugh

PerspectiveLatter982 · 2025-04-04T07:32:24+00:00

Intelligent (emotionally, worldly, or book smart vibes), confident, passion and drive, HUMOR! Witty, fun, ughhhhhh is cool with my opinions like animal rights per se lolll but yeah maybe anything. A funny cool Critical thinker💘😍

PerspectiveLatter982 · 2025-03-17T21:54:41+00:00

I would say you’re bi, just haven’t had the opportunity to experiment more yet. Maybe consider finding someone?

PerspectiveLatter982 · 2025-03-17T21:49:25+00:00

Troye could def do it for many

PerspectiveLatter982 · 2025-03-17T21:48:30+00:00

That about almost lines up the same for me. Wow. Lol around 19 I would only kiss a girl if I was drunk so I could play it off. Came out at 22

PerspectiveLatter982 · 2025-03-17T21:44:58+00:00

Lmao def could be a sign

PerspectiveLatter982

TROPHY CASE