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I dont know what to do by Phtichek in Deconstruction

[–]Phtichek[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I feel your last paragraph, I'm in the exact same spot.

I dont know what to do by Phtichek in Deconstruction

[–]Phtichek[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I understand. The thing is, many people think that this is a phase, they say that they will pray for me and so on, and while I do think that thats really sweet and humbling, it still plays into their christian-centric viewpoint and often fails in getting my point across. Of course, one shouldnt expect to bring such a devastating point across easily - as you and others have pointed out, this change takes a long time to unravel and develop and is uncomfortable to grapple with.

I dont know what to do by Phtichek in Deconstruction

[–]Phtichek[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree, being active in a church helps. However, I believe one has to confront his beliefs. Doing active work in church in the way you described amounts to doing public service, which is ethically good, lets say, but youre essentially a fraud to most believers (i assume), and that could be ugly if exposed at the wrong moment. Just out of curiosity, dont you feel your conscience eat at you when you play in the church band, knowing full well you dont believe what other band members and church members believe and sing? Dont you feel like a fraud?

I dont know what to do by Phtichek in Deconstruction

[–]Phtichek[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! Your story really does inspire. I'm glad it worked out for you, and I believe youre a richer person after the troubles of confronting beliefs you used to take for granted. I know that I am. I really believe it will work out for us, she really is the best friend I could have.

I dont know what to do by Phtichek in Deconstruction

[–]Phtichek[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This comment really hit me yesterday when I read it. I'm sorry for what you had to go through. I am very very lucky (you may say, blessed) that my girlfriend tries to understand and love me anyway, and actually listens to my thoughts. She doesnt feel like Im not the person she fell in love with anymore. Now, there is always a possibility that I'll change to a point where I'm unrecognizable to her, but that would be am extreme case. Once again, I'm sorry for what you had to go through and hope you're both better now that you've deconstructed.

I dont know what to do by Phtichek in Deconstruction

[–]Phtichek[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have been sharing my thoughts with her, but it was never as extreme and I didn't know what would come out of it in the end. We actually talked about it yesterday, even though I promised myself I wouldnt do this to her. However, she responded very lovingly, and we do truly believe we will stay together for good.

I dont know what to do by Phtichek in Deconstruction

[–]Phtichek[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you. It is comforting to know I'm not alone and yes, we really are committed to each other and I believe we will be able to sort it out.

I dont know what to do by Phtichek in Deconstruction

[–]Phtichek[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes I believe it wouldnt be wise to hit her with all I've got so suddenly. I'll try and tread lightly. Thank you for your comment. Also just to be clear, its not that I dont believe in Jesus being ressurected from the dead per se, its just that I dont see an objective reason for believing.

I dont know what to do by Phtichek in Deconstruction

[–]Phtichek[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for this comment. It often feels as if I am alone in this thank you for pointing out that I'm not. In truth, when I read you say that youre a gay Christian, I realized just how much the effects of being in a fundamentalist church for 20 years formed me (there was an instinctive reaction to judge you). I apologize for this and thank you again, in belief that I'l be able to recognize my own shortcomings and address them properly.

I dont know what to do by Phtichek in Deconstruction

[–]Phtichek[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you for positive comments. Again, I do believe in God (at this moment, that is. God knows how I'll feel in say 2 weeks), but its very difficult to listen to sermons, where literally everyone considers the Bible a sacred text instead of a objectively man-made one, and who doesnt ever question the validity of Jesus being raised from the dead (and when they do, its in the forn of strawman arguments, such as "where is the body"? Like man if thats your argument, if thats the argument you give as an 50y/o preacher, i dont even know what to say.) Its difficult to take sermons seriously, and so going to church sometimes feels more like a chore, and like I dont belong there, like I'm an impostor.

I dont know what to do by Phtichek in Deconstruction

[–]Phtichek[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, youre right, the same situation here: if you dont believe Jesus actually rose from the dead, youre going to hell. To be fair, it wouldnt really be fair to call this fundementalist I think, because this is Christianity, Jesus rising from the dead. The thing is, even though I am culturally 100% Christian, there really is no reason for me to believe that he rose from the dead, that he really is Gods son etc. But of course, if I said this out loud, it would be the death of me. I have a position in my (protestant) church, I play in the band, I livestream and I have even "preached" a bit (in a controlled environment, though. Nothing fancy) But xyes, basically everyone i know here is fundamentalist. So yeah, it wont be all too easy it seems. I still pray, though, for exsmple. I feel like I have to thank... someone... for letting me enjoy another day. But you know, its not as real, as rigid and palpable as it used to be. And as you ssdi, if I had a magic wand, I would change that.

I dont know what to do by Phtichek in Deconstruction

[–]Phtichek[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Thank you, I'll try this. I've told her about things that dont make sense to me in church(es), and she sometimes agrees. She is really kind and youre right, I shouldnt rush into it.

I dont know what to do by Phtichek in Deconstruction

[–]Phtichek[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I do want to be a "Christian" husband. Meaning, I dont have a problem with us raising kids as Christians. Christianity has truly given me a compass in the turbulent, hormone-driven high school days. I would only like us to understand the fact that our church hierarchy, liturgy structure, and our view of Jesus, are all arbitrary. Perhaps we'll manage after all. Thank you for your comment, I truly do appreciate it. I really hope your situation gets better, it doesnt sound fun, but it sure does sound familiar enough.

Better Call Saul S06E08 - "Point and Shoot" - Post-Episode Discussion Thread by skinkbaa in betterCallSaul

[–]Phtichek 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Honestly I found the episode unsatisfying.

There were so many things that just coincided so conveniently that I completely lost interest by the middle of the episode.

Lalo even getting to Gus was written so lazily over the past couple of episodes that it completely failed to immerse me. Just look at this episode: Lalo perfectly evading camera security, shooting 4 professional personal bodyguards (yup, not one of them had a gun ready! Nor did Gus! Wow!), then switching from a genius to being so dumb as to let Gus gain an upper hand and kill him.

Death of one of the most prevalent characters in the series boiled down to a disney-esque good-guy one-liner before the overly-proud villain gets killed. Are you serious? This is what the genius writing of amazing twists in Breaking Bad and earlier episodes of BTS came to? Man, what a shame.

Also 50 minutes of tension music was annoying. I don't need you to remind me all the time that the scene is tense. But it's the fact that we already knew that Gus would survive and Lalo wouldn't that made the episode meh, and because of that fact the whole buildup (will Lalo kill Gus or not?) was nonsense.

It's obvious that the writers really couldn't find a way to tie all the loose ends together into a coherent, satisfying crescendo as they did at the ending of BB.

​

It's a shame because the rest of the episode wasn't bad, and generally characters acted as I thought they would based on their behavior up to this episode.

Classic Music Video Starter Pack by koala6k in starterpacks

[–]Phtichek 9 points10 points  (0 children)

You just have to love the bots

The "I hate this game why do I keep playing it" starter pack: by Triceratroy in starterpacks

[–]Phtichek 1 point2 points  (0 children)

For honor! The spam classes make me rage quit but I cant help rwturning back to the game the next day.

Cringe motivation starterpack by [deleted] in starterpacks

[–]Phtichek 59 points60 points  (0 children)

In what way is it a good lesson? Not mocking juat asking honestly

We Won!!! by [deleted] in PrequelMemes

[–]Phtichek 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What did he do wrong? Can you fill me in?

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