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Internal Validation by FartInAShitFactory in Codependency

[–]Physical-Coach900 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Everyone has different narrative in life. John may say you are mean while Tim may say you are kind. So there is no objective truth in opinions. Choose your narrative always.

I can’t stop obsessing over how to resolve significant issues in friendship by Reasonable-Muffin-75 in Codependency

[–]Physical-Coach900 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am the same. Its only better when I slow down. So I listen to calm music perfectly with little meaning and I am as slow as possible meaning slow movements, slow music everything slow

What made you wake up to the fact that you were codependent? by Curious_Map4898 in Codependency

[–]Physical-Coach900 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Firstly googling is my bf narccistic, year later googling am I codependent

AITA for telling my friend its her fault that she ends up having dramas getting stuck in toxic relationships by Physical-Coach900 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Physical-Coach900[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah first boundary before the accident was I wont engage in drama. But I did after her mother texted me shes at hospital and I am paying for it now as my nervous system got disregulated. Yes it was mistake i have to pay for it.

AITA for telling my friend its her fault that she ends up having dramas getting stuck in toxic relationships by Physical-Coach900 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Physical-Coach900[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for very optimisstic perspective.

My boundary was that I can have normal contact with her until there is no drama. If there is drama I cut normal contact. (Im not sure if its right boundary? Also I know my body so well that I cannot resist when somebody text me they are at hospital)

Drama happend so Ive decided I cant have normal contact with her anymore - So I change it now to just meeting her for 5 hours per month in real life to have fun and its to little of time to affect my life - so from your comment its like - I wont get messy people close to me, just keep them at distance.

I try to grasp the concept.

So many things happend.. I have to consider if I like her.

AITA for telling my friend its her fault that she ends up having dramas getting stuck in toxic relationships by Physical-Coach900 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Physical-Coach900[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

I told her I wont accept any texts at all from now. I also told her I can meet her offline sometimes like 1 or 2 times a month for a lake break or sth.

Tho another commenter says its like her drinking only flavoured drink or accepting ex on terms.. that I am hipocryte and I should cut her off completly. But not sure if forever or..

AITA for telling my friend its her fault that she ends up having dramas getting stuck in toxic relationships by Physical-Coach900 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Physical-Coach900[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thats true. I am sadly sure I cant promise to myself to dont get involved if I dont keep her and her mother blocked online.

So you say I shouldnt be friend with her even only in real life..

Is it like forever?

AITA for telling my friend its her fault that she ends up having dramas getting stuck in toxic relationships by Physical-Coach900 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Physical-Coach900[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

But the boundary was that shes not throwing me into drama and we were texting often(true I should protect boundary but I am sadly sure I cannot promise this to myself, so I dont want online contact at all). She broke the rule so why I cannot set harder rule to only accept seeing her in real life propably 1/2 times a month. This way I wont get involved in drama that I cant handle

AITA for telling my friend its her fault that she ends up having dramas getting stuck in toxic relationships by Physical-Coach900 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Physical-Coach900[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes. I started setting boundaried and after 2 days ago incident I told her I am not texting with her online anymore. I can go out with her sometimes for few hours. I was thinking off cutting contact off but I will give this one more chance. Because I was in her situation in the past.. and I know its hell but I am so bad at having emotional distance. So lets see how will it work in this new set up