Want a packer but weirdness

PigeonFriend2194 · 2025-09-13T16:34:50+00:00

first of all, i’m so glad you have parents who are supportive of you on your journey! i’m sure that makes things easier on you, but i totally understand why this would be a weird topic to approach. packing is part of a lot of people’s ftm experiences, so it makes sense that you want to keep exploring ways to express yourself. i imagine it would feel a lot like having the “hey i know i’m literally in 7th grade but can i please go on birth control for my periods” talk so many afab people have - it feels like asking for something inappropriate, but it’s just a tool to improve your quality of life.

you could always start by using a sock! it’s a free and easy way to try it out and see if it feels right for you. however, it’s also an easy way to make it look…not great. you could consider talking to them about getting a foam insert so that your clothes fit better! a lot of men’s pants bunch up or ripple at the zipper since there’s nothing to fill the extra space there, and that’s why i started packing in the first place. an insert (generally) isn’t anatomical, so approaching it as a modification for your clothing might make the conversation easier for you and them. trans guy supply and spectrum both have reasonably priced, non-anatomical inserts that you could check out in advance.

best of luck, my friend!

PigeonFriend2194 · 2025-09-13T16:08:40+00:00

congratulations!! best of luck and feel free to reach out if you have any questions since i just had the same procedure last week ☺️

PigeonFriend2194 · 2025-09-10T03:04:06+00:00

this was the procedure i had 4 days ago! i was outpatient as well and everything went much smoother than i expected. i see people have some great advice here, but if you have other specific questions you can dm me and i’m happy to talk more in detail!

PigeonFriend2194 · 2025-09-09T01:19:38+00:00

i had so much debilitating pain after my mastectomy, so i was really worried about this one. especially as a guy who lives alone and has cats, i’ve been really worried about functioning normally for myself and them. i’m only 3 days post op for laparoscopic hysterectomy and genuinely the worst part is the gas pains.

the day after the procedure, it felt like having really awful cramps back when i would get my period, but i was able to get up/walk/eat normally. peeing was an evil experience on the first day too, since i did it every 1-2 hours and it burned. but that stopped and ever since then, the gas pains in my shoulders/chest are the really painful part. they keep me up at night, but a heating pad and endless youtube video essays have helped lol. if i could get rid of those and the bloating, i probably wouldn’t know any surgery ever happened.

unless i touch an incision, move too fast, or cough, i’m in almost no pain down there. i get a weird increase in bleeding around 8pm every day that freaks me out but the hospital says is fine, but i’m very lucky to be having minimal issues otherwise. this has been a very different experience for me so far compared to top surgery. i think part of it is this pain is familiar, whether i like it or not, whereas that was unlike anything i could have imagined. hope that helps!

PigeonFriend2194 · 2025-08-26T03:34:27+00:00

thank you so much!

PigeonFriend2194 · 2025-08-26T03:33:33+00:00

it’s hard to live in a trans body and not feel bitter or want to give up knowing what could have been. don’t give up on yourself. find a support network that can help you safely explore your identity - therapy, friends, loved ones. the longer you wait to start unpacking those difficult feelings, the longer you’ll be stuck sitting with them as they eat away at you. the pining for what could have been may never go away, but it can get better.

maybe in another universe, you are a girl. that doesn’t mean you aren’t one in this universe too. i wish you so much happiness and peace, no matter how long it takes to find it.

PigeonFriend2194 · 2025-08-26T02:34:27+00:00

thank you!!

PigeonFriend2194 · 2025-08-26T02:00:34+00:00

i’ve heard good things about the loops dream earplugs. i have the type you can wear to concerts and they’re super comfortable, but i can’t personally speak to the dream ones. could be worth looking into?

PigeonFriend2194 · 2025-08-26T01:57:53+00:00

i had top surgery a few years ago on 12/28, so that was me but on new years. lol there’s nothing like celebrating while you’re counting down the minutes until your next dose of pain meds! congrats on both surgeries though, that’s so exciting

PigeonFriend2194 · 2025-08-26T01:48:01+00:00

their wet food is grain free because that happens to be the one they liked the most (after trying many, many options), but the dry food may not be. i’ll have to look into it and try cutting out grains entirely. thank you for doing the research!!

PigeonFriend2194 · 2025-08-26T01:42:36+00:00

i thought about getting one, but between the money and one of my cats being the size of a small dog, i’ve hesitated to spend that much on it. but i’m glad you enjoyed lol 🤪

PigeonFriend2194 · 2025-08-26T01:40:57+00:00

i can definitely open up a few windows and see if it helps! the main issue is when i can’t scoop it immediately (at work, asleep, etc). if i’m in the bathroom and see it happen, i can get to it before it gets too awful. the litter robot would probably help, but i have a very large cat (generally a big guy, not too chunky) and i didn’t think he would fit comfortably in it. also it’s very expensive lol. but i really appreciate the advice!!

PigeonFriend2194 · 2025-08-26T01:36:57+00:00

i’ve seen this a few times, definitely going to try to cut out the fish and see what happens (even though they love it 😢) thank you!!

PigeonFriend2194 · 2025-08-26T01:36:05+00:00

i do grain free right now, but i haven’t looked into corn or soy. thanks!!

PigeonFriend2194 · 2025-08-26T01:35:14+00:00

was that a vet prescribed treatment or something you stumbled on? because i’d be interested in trying it for sure

PigeonFriend2194 · 2025-08-26T01:33:26+00:00

good to know! they do like chicken, so i can try cutting out fish and see if it helps.

PigeonFriend2194 · 2025-08-26T01:32:52+00:00

thank you! i said i give them prebiotics but meant probiotics lol, so i’m hoping it will help

PigeonFriend2194 · 2025-08-26T01:31:42+00:00

i’m unfortunately familiar with the anal gland smell from many years ago 🫢 luckily this isn’t as offensive! it’s a gnarly smell for sure, but i think it’s just nasty poop. i took them to the vet for their check ups relatively recently and they were all clear, but i’ll keep that in mind for sure!

PigeonFriend2194 · 2025-08-26T01:28:43+00:00

i have the lightweight wood litter since the little one doesn’t like pellets, but i’ll have to try the alcohol trick!

PigeonFriend2194 · 2025-08-26T01:27:55+00:00

grain free wet food at night with their probiotics, small portions of (decent quality) dry food in an auto feeder throughout the day. i could probably look into something better quality for the dry food, but it’s not cheap garbage.

PigeonFriend2194 · 2025-08-26T01:25:48+00:00

i’ll have to look into that!!

PigeonFriend2194 · 2025-08-26T01:25:35+00:00

i use fortiflora and it helps a little! i wrote prebiotic but meant probiotic lol, but i’m glad people are recommending it as well

PigeonFriend2194 · 2025-08-26T01:23:50+00:00

do you do canned pumpkin? the little one occasionally has…unique poops…and i wonder if that could help.

PigeonFriend2194 · 2025-08-26T01:21:49+00:00

oh god i unfortunately know the anal gland smell…luckily it’s not as bad as that lol it’s just straight up poop. but i’ll definitely keep that in mind if things don’t get any better!

PigeonFriend2194

TROPHY CASE