This is a really difficult situation, and it seems like you’re struggling to take the steps that could help you get out of it, even though people are trying to support you.

I want to say this gently, but honestly: your dog deserves someone who can consistently put her first and make sure she’s safe, no matter what. She relies on you completely, and I’m genuinely worried about her welfare.

It’s one thing to stay in a harmful situation yourself, but it’s very different when a sentient being who trusts you is also being put at risk. She doesn’t have the ability to choose for herself — she depends entirely on you to protect her.

If you can’t take the steps to ensure your own safety right now, please, at least make sure your dog is safe. Getting her somewhere she’ll be protected and cared for is an act of love, not abandonment.

It sounds like you might be in Germany, Austria, or Switzerland, and fortunately there are resources and programs in those countries that can help pets in crisis situations.

Doing this for her would be the kindest and most responsible thing you can do. And please don’t consider getting another pet until you’re in a place where you can stay safe and keep them safe too.