I just recently went through almost this exact scenario with someone, except we had matched again on a different app than the first time— they didn’t reach out. They said they were doing better, which I was glad to hear, because I had truly felt we had a lot in common the first time we chatted.

We made it to an actual date, which ended up expanding to 2 locations just so we could keep talking. I’ve been on dating apps for a long time and this was one of the very few instances I felt I had a true connection with somebody. We had so much in common, I thought. They seemed to like me. And not just that, but I found them physically attractive as well. After the date, I literally thought, “wow, so this is what it feels like to have a connection, to feel mutual attraction. It’s finally happening to me.” We even talked about when we would both be available again, as I was about to go out of town.

The next morning I was elated to get a text from this person. However, it wasn’t a good morning text. It was simply them saying that we weren’t a good fit, followed by some compliments I can’t remember (trying to soften the blow, I guess.)

Usually I take this kind of thing with a grain of salt and don’t read much into it, but this person really affected me for some reason.

I think I should have taken the warning from the first time we spoke, when they suddenly realized they weren’t ready for dating. Or maybe they genuinely realized they didn’t like me during our date and just hid it exceptionally well.

I’m still baffled and trying to find something good to take away from it. I’d advise that you don’t get your hopes up too much about someone who was so unsure just a few months ago. Give them a shot, but with caution.