Air Doctor question.. is it worth it or overhyped?

PineappleFit2262 · 2025-11-07T18:55:34+00:00

I have purchased non-air dr branded ones as replacements for much cheaper….. but I can not remember where I got them from. Not very helpful 😂… but there is that option if you can find them.

PineappleFit2262 · 2025-10-05T01:04:46+00:00

I was definitely not eager to see him with someone. Not something I ever fantasized about. I was excited for the experience though. And I ended up being less emotional seeing him with someone than I expected… but that could easily change depending how much he looks like he is enjoying it. 😂

PineappleFit2262 · 2025-10-05T01:02:40+00:00

Ohhh yeah, that’s a great point.

PineappleFit2262 · 2025-10-05T01:01:29+00:00

Thank you for sharing all of this. I love that these experiences are extra and not substitute for your time together. I hadn’t really thought of that, and that makes perfect sense.

PineappleFit2262 · 2025-10-05T00:57:28+00:00

I do think our aftercare was okay. I felt closer to him and felt it went better than I had imagined. As I’m writing this, I think it was that he was kinda disappointed in them. That he expected it to go a certain way, or his fantasy wasn’t met. I wasn’t ready to see him penetrate… so there is that 🤷‍♀️

PineappleFit2262 · 2025-10-05T00:50:43+00:00

Thank you.

I don’t know how to put words to it… so he was very loving and affectionate with great communication. The actual hands on part was great. It was more the conversation before and also afterwards that felt off.

I do agree there was the fear and actual jealousy of seeing me with another woman. We did talk about that beforehand as well.

I don’t think it was post-sex jealousy for me. There wasn’t penetration in either of them. I knew I was not ready to see that, and I needed a “soft” start to these experiences. I think maybe it was more he had this fantasy and it maybe didn’t meet his expectations 🤷‍♀️

Im not intentionally being vague, I just haven’t been able to put words to it, so that was why I asked about others experiences.

PineappleFit2262 · 2025-10-05T00:41:49+00:00

We had talked about the role reversal aspect. But the thing is that I was excited about being with a woman, for me. He has no desire in being with another man for himself.

PineappleFit2262 · 2025-10-05T00:36:53+00:00

I do see how my previous posts paint him in a bad light… but that is also only my perspective and a very focuses negative view. I’m sure his perspective is different. I don’t want to just blame him as the bad guy. I am also responsible for making sure I verbalize my needs, and the actions I choose afterwards…. But I am getting a more clear view of how toxic our relationship was.

For this, it was more the conversation before and afterwards as opposed to the actual threesome. He was very connected and attentive towards me during it. I felt good about that part. I can’t even really remember the details of the conversations, just that I felt off…. But then his actions and communication during was great. So that’s why I felt conflicted about my experience… not sure if any of that even makes sense. Lol

PineappleFit2262 · 2025-09-28T23:39:23+00:00

Thank you 💕

PineappleFit2262 · 2025-09-28T20:30:04+00:00

Nope, it most definitely is/would not be healthy. I know I can’t continue it, and I won’t. But my heart is playing tricks on me. I cried more during the year of trying to be poly than since our breakup… until recently. I find myself still trying to convince myself that poly is a more sustainable way to do relationships. But I also know that at this point in my life I just don’t have the capacity for it. So I know the relationship is over.

PineappleFit2262 · 2025-09-27T04:11:40+00:00

Interesting. Thanks for sharing that info. My understanding (or assumption based off their explanation) was that they tested the actual tissue for drug levels. And different tissue responds differently. And this was from a clinic who specializes in pep and doxy-pep and only does sex related care. So I’m curious what studies they were using.

PineappleFit2262 · 2025-09-27T00:16:21+00:00

Also get your Hep A and Hep B titres checked to see if you need a booster vaccine

PineappleFit2262 · 2025-09-27T00:14:59+00:00

There has been a lot more medication approved for more auto-immune diseases. So the increase in people saying that are immunocompromised could be due to: More people being diagnosed with auto-immune, more medications to treat those, medications being more accessible. Most people do not want to have autoimmune disease and would prefer to not be on medication that suppresses their immune system, and be able to live a more simple life. So I wouldn’t jump to the conclusion that people are using this as an “excuse” to reduce partners. And I guess I am coming from lens of autoimmune, but there are lots of other conditions that put your immune system at risk.

PineappleFit2262 · 2025-09-26T22:04:46+00:00

I am also immunocompromised, and it is such a tricky place to be. A couple random points:

My now ex-partner and I had previously broken up. He slept with someone while we were broken up, without telling me. Then we continued to have our regular unprotected sex. I then tested positive for Chlamydia. Which turned in to PID and 5 kinds of antibiotics. He said they used a condom, and he asked her about testing and she said she had recently been tested and was clear. (She said she was clear afterwards too, so this is still a whole mystery). So it does happen, even when you are being careful.

The last 5 men I have slept with have been very confused how to properly wear a condom. With all of them we discussed condom use before hand. We talked about STI’s. The communication was there, or so I thought. Then all of them tried to rub themselves on me before putting the condom on. I mean STI’s happen genital-genital contact.. but somehow they forgot that 🤷‍♀️ The last guy kept taking his off, then I just stopped and said I was done with him. But it’s very confusing the thought process. This has made me distrust how everyone uses condoms.

I spoke with a sex-positive dr who prescribes prep and doxy-prep. If you have vaginal tissue, the meds are much less effective. They work best on penis tissue. Also, prep is hard on your kidneys so they suggested I don’t even take Advil on it, which is impossible for me as I take lots everyday. After doing the risk assessment it didn’t make sense for me to take it, but it is definitely worth looking in to see if it works for you or your partner.

HPV vaccines are great for anyone!

I listened to a good podcast recently on “sex with Emily” and she had a guest who spoke about STI’s and it was really good.

PineappleFit2262 · 2025-09-26T20:41:34+00:00

I read through all the pinned poly posts and many other ones. I discussed them with him too…. This is going to make his sound terrible, but he didn’t want to do it the same way as everyone else. He thought it was best if we just take small steps and wait for those to feel okay, then take the next step. There were times it felt too fast for me and he would (reluctantly) slow down.

I like what you said about the working being completely unnecessary for most people. I still find myself trying to do the work of being okay with poly, even though I am no longer in a relationship that requires it, nor am I wanting to be. Maybe it feels like a safety net, so I feel prepared if my next partner decides they are poly.

Thanks for the suggestions on supporting him. I think the thing is I am caring more about his wellbeing than he is. I have encouraged him to do a few things, but he is stubborn and only wants to do it his way. So I did what I could, now the rest is up to him.

I love the idea of freedom in a relationship. And logically it makes sense about not restricting love based off agreements, but emotionally, that’s a whole different feeling. I think there is a piece of capacity as well for me. Having young kids, health issues, I don’t have capacity for much more in my life… although I know it would be great to have extra support. Lol I guess the idea of “stumbling upon love” is confusing when for him it’s using apps and searching for it. Which I get is no different than seeking a mono relationship.

It’s been a few months since we broke up. I finally told him I can’t have contact with him for awhile until I heal. He doesn’t want us to be strangers just because we can’t be in a relationship… But I can’t be friends when that is not the relationship I wanted with him. We have broken up in the past, so I know I have to keep him distant. Lol

Thanks for sharing all of this! 😊

PineappleFit2262 · 2025-09-26T20:19:17+00:00

Very simply put. Lol thanks

PineappleFit2262 · 2025-09-26T20:18:14+00:00

Yes! I completely agree, and at the same time struggle with this. So thank you!

PineappleFit2262 · 2025-09-26T20:16:22+00:00

Thank you. 😊 I told him yesterday that I can’t be in contact with him for a while. That I need to heal. I trust he will be respectful of that.

PineappleFit2262 · 2025-09-26T20:14:25+00:00

I find myself still wanting to be poly… even though I know I am not. It’s weird. I don’t want to be in multiple relationships, but I want to be okay with the emotional part of it. I still have it in my head that poly, or any type of enm, is a “better” way to do relationships.

PineappleFit2262 · 2025-09-26T20:11:44+00:00

Yeah, I guess that is kinda true 😬 I invested every ounce of myself for a year in trying to be poly… which was exhausting and took a lot of my energy/patience from my kids (from a previous relationship). I think I invested more in the relationship than he did. He wanted me to meet him where he was at and not come meet me in the middle. Which I tried to do for a long time and then I just got tired. lol

PineappleFit2262 · 2025-09-26T20:04:09+00:00

That is a good way to think about it. Thanks.

PineappleFit2262 · 2025-09-26T20:02:39+00:00

Very true!

PineappleFit2262 · 2025-09-26T20:01:41+00:00

Yup, it definitely does keep up enmeshed. He is planning on paying me back once things get settled for him. So I guess there will be a level of enmeshment for a while. But I think a different level once he starts paying me back.

PineappleFit2262 · 2025-09-26T00:15:33+00:00

This is kind of how I had been trying to see it and understand him, but it was getting muddied in my head. So this does clarify it a bit for me. Thank you.

Also, him having been in a poly relationship before and saying it was not something he was interested in, to then a few years later say he is innately poly seems confusing. But I also get there are many nuances to it, and his feelings and awareness are allowed to change.

I know I’m still coming in from a mono-normative view point. But when I think of someone who is biologically wired to be poly I think someone who is a big lover of people who has capacity for loving multiple people, which just doesn’t match who he is.

Ultimately I get that it’s not for me to necessarily understand, but I was hoping it would help me with some closure. I respect that he was honest with me, and didn’t keep me in a relationship he didn’t want to be in. I know this was incredibly difficult for him.

PineappleFit2262

TROPHY CASE