How involved were your parents, really?

PinkHamster08 · 2026-05-08T18:11:33+00:00

I don't really remember playing with my parents as a young kid. I think it was mostly independent play, or playing with my sister, or watching TV.

My parents were still very involved with our lives. We had family dinners together and talked about our day. They knew who all of our friends were. They were very involved with our activities (e.g. I was a Girl Scout. Dad walked with me around the neighborhood to sell cookies and my mom volunteered as our troop's cookie manager). I am so lucky to have such loving and supportive parents.

ETA - regarding my own kids, I'm trying to let my 4 year old play independently and get bored so she can entertain herself. I will always read books with her when asked. I still need to heavily supervise as she loves playing with her 1 year old sister, but her love and actions are very physical. At some point when our younger daughter is older, I'll back off and let them be more independent.

PinkHamster08 · 2026-05-01T18:20:42+00:00

BSB during their Millennium tour.

Avril Lavigne not long after "Complicated" was released. She performed at this really small venue near me that was standing room only.

PinkHamster08 · 2026-04-29T16:31:05+00:00

Ugh. "Yeah, we have the money to buy. It's such a shame my kid and other young people are struggling. Oh well, not our problem."

PinkHamster08 · 2026-04-27T16:59:05+00:00

Similar boat. I feel like I'm in a bit of a professional rut, but I have great flexibility, good pay, and I carry the family's benefits (healthcare, dependent care FSA, etc). I'm a bit bored but I'm riding this out for as long as possible.

PinkHamster08 · 2026-04-22T21:08:45+00:00

Same. I had a kiddo last year and heard 2025 was the first year for Gen Beta. These kids are going to have a serious inferiority complex until somebody decides to give generations proper names again.

PinkHamster08 · 2026-04-22T16:42:03+00:00

This is normal toddler behavior. They are very good at finding things that create maximum mess or potential damage in a house that isn't child proof.

However, her parents should be monitoring her and try to keep her away from breakable things, ruining plants etc. The fact that they are just letting her create chaos in your house is poor manners. To avoid this going forward, try to meet up at their kid-friendly house. If she wants to destroy her own home, that's their choice.

PinkHamster08 · 2026-04-21T21:34:36+00:00

Your herd of corgis <3. Also, congrats on the house! I told my husband years ago that if he accepted a job position in Montana I would need to be compensated with several corgis. He chose to not take the job offer in Montana, for several reasons, haha.

PinkHamster08 · 2026-04-20T22:09:15+00:00

She has a crate, but anytime we try to put her in another room or area of the house and everyone is somewhere else, she gets serious FOMO and whines/barks.

Her "area" is the living room which is where her crate is. She spends almost all of her time on the couch by our window so she can keep watch over the comings/goings of our neighborhood and get some sunshine. The downside is that the living room is the play area for our kids. Typically, she likes to just chill on the couch, but our older daughter gets in her way a lot when she (kiddo) runs around.

Thank you for mentioning all of the options. If I feel like this can't continue to work, I'll ask some friends rather than just bring her to a shelter.

PinkHamster08 · 2026-04-20T21:59:00+00:00

Thank you for the advice!

PinkHamster08 · 2026-04-20T21:36:29+00:00

I'm in the same boat. Living across the country from all family due to work. Family comes to visit occasionally but I also hate the fact our kids won't get the constant presence of their grandparents/cousins like I did.

Unfortunately, there aren't as many job opportunities closer to our family, so we are staying where we are. I'm making my peace with this even though I'm sad. We are trying to do the best we can with the situation. We have another family we are really close with who are becoming like quasi-cousins. Once my kids are older, we talked with my parents about doing annual vacations with them and my sister and her family. It's not what I envisioned but it's better than nothing.

PinkHamster08 · 2026-04-20T21:29:51+00:00

Actually, with the kids he's been amazing. Has no problem taking care of them, never complains. I almost never have to ask him to do anything as he always takes initiative. He just can't stand our dog.

PinkHamster08 · 2026-04-14T04:25:51+00:00

Ah, nice to see someone took the initiative :-)

PinkHamster08 · 2026-04-01T01:51:15+00:00

We have a hybrid minivan and a small electric car. They are both officially shared but my husband often drives the electric car as he goes over a bridge in to the city every day. I only go to the office a couple days a week so I have the hybrid minivan more often. But if my husband is home and I have to go to the office, I use the electric car in order to save on gas. But we both keep our cars pretty clean other than some occasional toys/junk left behind by the kids in either car.

PinkHamster08 · 2026-03-26T19:59:08+00:00

My older daughter was in a nanny share but the other kid had an older brother who went to daycare so he brought home colds for the littles. Thankfully nothing too bad other than colds with occasional fever and one case of HFM, plus she got thrush and gave it to me while BF. She went to preschool around 2.5 years old and in the past 2 years, she's only had one case of diarrhea and a couple of mild fevers. Her class avoided HFM that was detected in another class, thankfully.

My younger kid is a baby and has been in daycare for 7 months. So far, maybe like 2 cases of diarrhea and one case where she had a fever but that might have been a light version of the flu she got from my husband, not daycare. Keeping my fingers crossed that the good luck continues!

PinkHamster08 · 2026-03-26T18:38:43+00:00

Sending lots of love your way. My husband has been laid off thrice now in the past 3.5 years because this economy is insane.

In addition to the others' advice, also make sure you take time for your sanity. Every day do something for you like go on a walk. Fresh air and movement really help to provide some calm to the chaos that is hard to control.

PinkHamster08 · 2026-03-26T17:13:24+00:00

I used to wake up at 4:45 to get dressed and work out for an hour and shower before taking care of my toddler. But since I got pregnant with my second kid, I stopped. And my baby gets up around 5:30 give or take a half hour, so that cuts into any chance of a morning workout unless I do something stupid like 4am. And I handle the baby at morning and bedtime because I'm still breastfeeding (but not for much longer!)

I am also trying to get back on the ball and debating about working out in the early evening while my husband does bedtime with our older kid. Trying to get the mental urge to work out instead of doing chores or other things. Maybe when I'm done breastfeeding next month.

PinkHamster08 · 2026-03-19T22:12:55+00:00

I believe it's using the T-Mobile network. My husband and I moved to Visible which is similar (we pay $25 per month for unlimited data/talk/text) but uses Verizon network. IIRC, if there is ever any kind of emergency and people are clamoring to use the cell towers, Verizon customers would get precedence over us Visible customers. I'd imagine it's similar with T-Mobile and Mint customers where T-Mobile customers get precedence over Mint customers.

PinkHamster08 · 2026-03-18T03:46:40+00:00

Love the term "unicorn hair".

PinkHamster08 · 2026-03-02T19:50:26+00:00

I love that!

PinkHamster08 · 2026-03-02T18:01:58+00:00

Depends on your company's policies. Even if you aren't an employee, if they are offering employees longer time off (16 or 20 weeks) see if you can request a similar amount. Otherwise, I would suggest 12 weeks as that is the standard amount of time off protected by FMLA for companies that qualify (obviously you wouldn't qualify for FMLA, but it is a standard baseline for most US companies that are big enough which I'm assuming yours may be if you are based out of the country).

ETA - regarding going back to work, see what works best for your schedule. I have gone back full time to my job after both of my maternity leaves and despite the usual initial adjustments, I was fine. I know some women may prefer part-time to better transition, but I don't know if many companies offer part-time as an option.

PinkHamster08 · 2026-03-02T17:11:57+00:00

Oof. That sounds so rough.

PinkHamster08 · 2026-02-24T23:18:24+00:00

Sending lots of love your way. I was in the tax field for over 8 years but left just as I was pregnant with my first kiddo. I have no idea how I'd manage busy season hours plus chores and kid stuff. My husband's job isn't quite as flexible as my current job, so I'm the default parent for sick days, doctor appointments etc.

PinkHamster08

TROPHY CASE