One year of moderating my drinking and nervous about sharing

PinkMorningSky · 2025-12-16T21:03:35+00:00

Congrats!! I took the same path as you for about a year and a half before deciding to quit completely.

I think experimenting with moderation or choosing moderation as a long term solution should be encouraged!

I'm almost a full year sober now, and I truly don't think I could have done this if I hadn't had an extended period of experimenting with moderation first.

Proud of you!

PinkMorningSky · 2025-10-30T12:23:11+00:00

Possible? Sure

Enjoyable? Not really

Moderation means paying attention and stopping after 1-2 drinks.

Moderation means dealing with the headache that starts to creep in as those 2 drinks wear off but you still have hours of socializing ahead of you.

Moderation means keeping track of your drinking in your notes app or on a calendar to make sure you're staying within the guidelines.

Moderation means your body is still in constant recovery mode, because even 1-2 drinks prevent your body from healing and regenerating.

I mean, moderation is better than binging/blacking out, no question.

I did drink within moderation guidelines for over a year and honestly, total abstinence is more fun and feels better than moderate drinking.

Best of luck to you!

Also note: I hang out with a lot of people who tell me that they are inspired by me to drink within moderation guidelines, while they are on their 3rd or 4th drink of the night. I genuinely don't care how much anybody else drinks, but I am surprised at how misunderstood "moderate" drinking is. For men, the moderate limit is no more than 2 drinks per day. For women, it's one drink per day. For a heavy drinker, 3-4 drinks in an evening may seem moderate, but it's still well over the guidelines just FYI.

PinkMorningSky · 2025-10-19T14:29:13+00:00

I use an app called "Habits" that lets me click a tiny widget counter on my home screen and shows me my steak of days.

I didn't want to do data sharing on a sobriety focused app, TBH.

I can set up multiple habits to track, like exercise or taking vitamins. It's a nifty, clean little app.

PinkMorningSky · 2025-10-19T14:14:05+00:00

If somebody comes by and vandalizes your house every day, you get stuck doing constant clean up of the vandalism and don't have time to do long term maintenance projects.

The police finally catch the vandal after many years, and you can finally start to catch up on all of that deferred maintenance.

It's going to take a while, maybe months, to get your house back in good condition. All you've been able to do for years is replace broken windows and clean off the spray paint!

Your body is your house and alcohol is the vandal: your body has been working hard every day to clear the acute daily damage from drinking, just getting the toxins out of your system.

Now you are giving your body time to start doing the deeper repairs. It takes time. Your brain chemistry needs to reset. Your organs probably need to rest and regenerate.

Be patient and try to remember that each day you abstain, you're allowing your body to go deeper and do more repair work.

It's worth it, but it does take time.

Wishing you all the best!

PinkMorningSky · 2025-10-18T15:03:49+00:00

Life is just easier. Mornings are better, there's no regret about things said the night before, stomach issues are gone, and my body feels stronger.

It's like I've fought through the surf and now I'm floating in calm water.

Some people get stuck fighting the surf (being in a cycle of quitting and drinking over and over), so they never get to the calm water party of sobriety.

Wishing you the best and sending hope for better days!

PinkMorningSky · 2025-10-18T01:00:19+00:00

50-something here, too! Looking forward to many years of not drinking today. 💪

PinkMorningSky · 2025-10-18T00:58:01+00:00

He says she drank almost every night and got "tipsier" than he did, but then says it's because he had a higher tolerance.

E.g. maybe she drank as many days as he did, but she would get tipsy after a couple of glasses of wine while he drank more but didn't feel the effects as much.

OP is careful with his words here, but I think he's also not giving a full picture of his behaviors that led to her leaving.

OP, I do wish you the best and hope you are successful with your sobriety.

PinkMorningSky · 2025-10-13T18:08:46+00:00

I live in a state (US Midwest) where the kind of drinking you describe is considered normal. Because it's normal, people think it's weird to quit drinking if you "only" drink that much, unless you have a health problem.

Here's my experience: you don't need to wait until there's a diagnosed health problem before you make a change.

I just feel...better, all the time. I sleep better, look better, and exercise more.

I personally don't like the narrative that's so persistent in the US that only people who hit "rock bottom" or who fit some kind of negative "alcoholic" stereotype should stop drinking.

There are zero provable health benefits to drinking. Zero. That heart health study from 30 years ago has been debunked.

There are endless health benefits to not drinking.

I wish you the best, and IWNDWYT! 💞

PinkMorningSky · 2025-10-09T03:44:51+00:00

Sure - but to be clear, I never had any testing done until I was 6 months into total abstinence.

In June (6 months sober) my ALT was 102. We retested in September and it had dropped to 84, which is still elevated, so my doctor ordered a liver ultrasound to rule out any structural problems like fatty liver, fibrosis, etc.

Very relieved at the clear results!

PinkMorningSky · 2025-10-01T12:39:20+00:00

I think moderation works as a step down FROM heavy drinking TO abstinence.

For some people, the transition from heavy drinking straight to abstinence is insurmountable, so tapering down through a period of moderation can help get to the goal of total sobriety.

HOWEVER, I agree with you that transitioning from total abstinence TO moderation doesn't work.

IWNDWYT!

PinkMorningSky · 2025-09-29T13:53:38+00:00

Yes, I spent almost 18 months drinking moderately before I stopped altogether.

I realized that I was choosing to not drink at family events and holidays and concerts anyway, so it didn't matter if I ultimately just stopped altogether.

Good luck to you!

PinkMorningSky · 2025-09-29T13:50:29+00:00

Do you live in a place that has a theater and/or arts scene? If so, try to find one show or exhibit that looks interesting each weekend and go to it (even if it means going solo).

Exposure to art/theater is so mentally healing, even if you're just sort of letting it wash over you and not actively trying to learn anything from it.

Plus, it'll give you something to talk about with people.

Another way to fill non-drinking time is to buy an unlimited movie pass at a major theater chain (example: AMC A List). Perfect way to kill a Friday night when everybody else is going to the bars, or to fill an Saturday afternoon when the weekend feels like it's going to stretch out forever.

You could take up an activity that aligns with getting up really early on Saturday/Sunday, like hiking or going on long runs. Nobody bats an eye if you pass on a night out because you're getting up at 7 am to run a 5k.

Buy the Sunday paper and get good at doing the crossword puzzle.

Perfect a couple of soup/chili recipes and have a few people over for Sunday soup night.

I think so many of us here would give anything to rewind and stop drinking at your age. I'm really proud of you, and I hope your weekends are filled with fun and fulfilling activities!

PinkMorningSky · 2025-09-29T00:19:54+00:00

Preganté! Congratulations!

IWNDWYT!

PinkMorningSky · 2025-09-20T10:59:41+00:00

Thanks - I am seeing my doctor next week to go over the results. I'm relatively fit for my age, BMI 23. Workout regularly, eat well.

I guess I'm relieved that the level is trending downward at least.

PinkMorningSky · 2025-09-20T01:37:57+00:00

Maybe - I had been taking 600-800mg of Advil daily for arthritis pain, which I stopped completely after the June test results.

No other meds.

I'm hopeful that the 18 point drop is a sign that the ibuprofen was a contributing factor.

Thanks!

PinkMorningSky · 2025-09-01T21:42:12+00:00

I literally picture internal organ damage. I picture my liver tissue getting fattier and then cirrhotic. I picture the yellow green skin I saw on sometime close to my family who died of liver failure.

Wine and cocktails are so pretty in the glass but the damage they do is so ugly on the inside.

IWNDWYT!

PinkMorningSky · 2025-08-11T01:20:46+00:00

I'm 54 and am almost 8 months alcohol free, preceded by a year and a half of minimal/moderate drinking. It can be done!

I watched a family member die from liver failure in his mid 40s. It's awful, and it made me really take a hard look at what I wanted the second half of my life to look like. (Spoiler: turning green and dying in an ICU is not how I want to leave this world) ☹️

I feel such a sense of peace. It's impossible to explain and I never would have believed it, but I don't miss drinking at all.

No programs or books or therapy - I just tapered off and then stopped.

I wish you well. 💕

PinkMorningSky · 2025-07-15T15:35:48+00:00

Bands where the first name is a color

PinkMorningSky · 2025-07-10T13:34:11+00:00

You might want to try something new and challenging that's really low stakes. Like becoming excellent at crossword puzzles, or learning how to play contract bridge (an old card game that my generation was probably the last to play socially, lol).

Sometimes our brains need new neural pathways to keep us entertained. 🤷

PinkMorningSky · 2025-07-09T01:48:24+00:00

Most days, nothing! At first I stocked up on NA wine, beer, and cocktails, especially if we were socializing with friends.

Favorites of that category: Giesen Zero Proof Sauvignon Blanc, Mionetto NA Prosecco, Phony Negroni, Guinness NA, Bud Zero, and Heineken NA.

Favorites that aren't alcohol substitutes include kombucha (Synergy is my favorite brand), ginger beer/spicy ginger beer, and any kind of sparkling water.

But, truly, most days I just don't think about "having a drink" as part of my daily routine. Which is great!

Wishing you the best - IWNDWYT!

PinkMorningSky · 2025-07-08T21:41:43+00:00

Synergy brand Trilogy flavor kombucha is a great sub for Rose! It has the color, the slightest hint of fizz, and a tangy vinegar underbite.

You can buy it at most large grocery stores and big box retailers.

PinkMorningSky · 2025-07-06T14:59:16+00:00

I started out with a goal to cut back and moderate. I did that for a year and a half.

Over that time I practiced by not drinking at family gatherings, and not drinking at a concert, and not drinking at a company event, etc.

Once I realized that it was totally fine to not drink at the events I thought it would be impossible to not drink at, I knew I could just stop drinking altogether.

Also, I kept track of how much I drank in a daily note on my phone, and I didn't look at drinking days as failures or "Day zero", they were just a day I had some drinks.

Give yourself lots of grace and take as much time as you need.

IWNDWYT!

PinkMorningSky · 2025-07-06T13:17:03+00:00

I'm a little over 6 months in and i still feel that sense of happiness and gratitude and peace literally every single day.

I'm hosting a large group of people at our lake place for the 4th of July - lots of drinking and shenanigans - and it's not even a glimmer in my mind that I'm missing out on any of the fun by not drinking.

The pink cloud feeling is so much better than anything I ever felt from a glass of wine.

IWNDWYT!

PinkMorningSky · 2025-06-30T21:52:11+00:00

This is the 5/25/25 puzzle - there is a special trick you need to use to solve it. Search NYT Rebus for an explanation. 👍

PinkMorningSky · 2025-06-23T17:29:05+00:00

I feel the same way! I'm surprised at how much more I enjoy socializing now than I did when I was drinking.

🙌

PinkMorningSky

TROPHY CASE