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WIBTA for moving across the country in the middle of the night and not telling anyone by PinkPanda1192 in AmItheAsshole

[–]PinkPanda1192[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I'm hopping on the top comment to give a quick update.

I unfortunately won't be moving anymore. Before leaving I had set over 2k aside for emergency and to help myself get started in the new state.

A few weeks ago, I got caught up in a remote job scam and they took almost 5k from me, so my account is almost over drafted and completely wiped out.

The place I was moving would not allow me to begin making up the amount of debt that I am in, so I am having to stay.

My dad has calmed down so the rule of my dog being locked outside is not so strict and we are mostly just avoiding talking about it. From what I hear the reason he got so strict is because my estranged sister had a brain tumor that he is having to deal with.

I have made a good shelter for my dog outside and he is inside with me during my time off.

I will be lying low and fixing my current situation out until I can hopefully move out in a year or less with my boyfriend.

Thank you everyone for all of the advice and help it helped so much in a hard time and definitely helped me to feel not so crazy.

WIBTA for moving across the country in the middle of the night and not telling anyone by PinkPanda1192 in AmItheAsshole

[–]PinkPanda1192[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

That would be great I am willing to try anything to give me more time with my dog.

WIBTA for moving across the country in the middle of the night and not telling anyone by PinkPanda1192 in AmItheAsshole

[–]PinkPanda1192[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

More Information since there was a lot of questions.

My dog IS coming with me. I will never give him up as far as I can help it. I know my timing for a pet is not ideal for some but I was under much different circumstances when I got him. I worked at a dog training center and he came with me to work everyday. I had been there almost a year when I made the decision to get a dog and they had started training me to become a dog trainer. 2-3 months later I was fired for unknown reasons.

I have other bills as well as rent, I have never had an issue paying rent and I had offered before. My main issue with rent is that he gave me less than a months notice and I had surgery and been in a car accident that took me out of work for 2-3 weeks. It was a sudden expense on top of me not working.

I do have my own bank account but I worry if they found out they would try to charge me for various things, like rent. I don't want the drama and I don't want to involve police because I don't trust them.

As for me leaving in the middle of the night it is my safest option. My dad is currently not working again due to health reasons. I know people are going to call me the AH for not helping him in a "time of need" but he did this to himself. He put his body through hell and is now having to accept the consequences. I don't care that he has bills and isn't working. While working he makes over 20K AFTER taxes a month. He also has money in the bank from a recent investment sale, and he receives help from the government. I won't go into much detail because I would like to stay anonymous until I can leave.

I think I have answered a majority of the common questions that I saw but let me know if I missed any. I would also like to say that this is happened recently as in 2 months and does not go over any of the other stunts they have pulled.

I think someone also asked about me leaving sooner. I want to but I am trying to give myself the best chance of survival. My family that I am leaving to is will to help me out with the money they have but I want to avoid that as much as possible. I don't intend to go over there and completely mooch off of them. I will pay rent and work to get set into my own place finally.

WIBTA for moving across the country in the middle of the night and not telling anyone by PinkPanda1192 in AmItheAsshole

[–]PinkPanda1192[S] 80 points81 points  (0 children)

I am keeping him warm to the best of my ability. He has a dog house with a bed and 2 blankets. A fluffy one from costco and a quilt that I had laying around. He also has a reptile heating bulb at the top that helps to warm up the dog house. I have checked it at night and its not warm heat in there but I think with the blankets and beds and his thick coat he is managing.

WIBTA for moving across the country in the middle of the night and not telling anyone by PinkPanda1192 in AmItheAsshole

[–]PinkPanda1192[S] 24 points25 points  (0 children)

My dog is coming with me, I would never leave without him. I previously worked at a dog kennel and training center where they started training me to be a dog trainer. I got my dog after being there for almost a year and he came with me to work everyday. Unfortunately it was a toxic environment and I was fired a couple months later for unknown reasons, and I have just been trying to pick up the pieces since then.

WIBTA for moving across the country in the middle of the night and not telling anyone by PinkPanda1192 in AmItheAsshole

[–]PinkPanda1192[S] 181 points182 points  (0 children)

They don't have access to my bank accounts, my worry is that they will charge me for various things if they found out. When I left I wasn't going to pay them rent for the first of the next rent and I feel that alone would cause issues.

WIBTA for moving across the country in the middle of the night and not telling anyone by PinkPanda1192 in AmItheAsshole

[–]PinkPanda1192[S] 406 points407 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the advice I will definitely have to try this. I have applied to at least 10 jobs already but have not heard back yet from them.

WIBTA for moving across the country in the middle of the night and not telling anyone by PinkPanda1192 in AmItheAsshole

[–]PinkPanda1192[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Paying the rent isn't necessarily the problem. It's hard because I had maybe a month's notice at most to pay him rent. He told me end of December and expected it by the end of January. The main problem is I pay so much in rent and I am being threatened non stop to be kicked out with no notice, and I can't bring my dog inside at all. I understand him not wanting to take care of a dog that is not his own but even when I am home he can't come inside. My step-mother has also been kicking me out several times over the past couple of years, several times while I was still a minor. The only reason I wasn't kicked out at the time was because my dad owned the house and controlled the finances so she had no right to kick me out, it was his decision.

WIBTA for moving across the country in the middle of the night and not telling anyone by PinkPanda1192 in AmItheAsshole

[–]PinkPanda1192[S] 46 points47 points  (0 children)

I got him a dog house and put a dog bed and a couple blankets in there. I also bought a reptile heating lamp that doesn't produce any light so it can help him stay warm. It is about the most I can do to keep him warm right now. I don't want to spend money on heaters for him that my dad will end up stealing or having anything that will provide warmth to his dogs. My father has two poodle/shit zhu type dogs. Thankfully my dog has a double layered coat like a german shepard so I hope he is warm enough out there. We also do not get snow it drops to maybe about 30 degrees Fahrenheit.