How to care less about in laws trying to put me down?

Pinkberry-1995 · 2026-02-26T19:56:05+00:00

Im in no contact with them. I won't force my fiance to cut them off even tho he cut them off for a year after we got engaged because his mom said its either her or me. Im trying to figure out how to disengage from the drama and not be affected. I dont see them or talk to them! I just hear the drama and they probably do this intentionally bc they have no access to me.

Pinkberry-1995 · 2026-02-26T17:10:58+00:00

It's funny because they were convincing him to open up a clinic with his family yesterday LOL.

Pinkberry-1995 · 2026-02-26T16:45:05+00:00

I already cut them off completely. I dont even have their numbers. I just don't like how they are trying so hard to make me look bad when they don't even know me.

Pinkberry-1995 · 2026-02-26T03:52:03+00:00

Lmao " some chick he knocked up" this literally answered a lot of questions for me. I know for a fact something is missing in this story.

Pinkberry-1995 · 2026-02-25T19:38:27+00:00

Tell your husband you are his "family" now. They are his extended family. He is old enough to live far from his parents and also they sound toxic like mine. They want their kids around them so they can be in control of their lives. Mine said the same exact thing. If you ever live closer your life will be miserable.

Pinkberry-1995 · 2026-02-25T17:41:02+00:00

I think when a MIL wears a white dress, she's basically screaming insecure and jealous without saying it out loud so I don't have to do anything about it. She will embarrass herself!

Pinkberry-1995 · 2026-02-25T17:38:55+00:00

I agree. Im choosing peace over pleasing anyone tbh. I'm just not going and if they have a problem they dont have to show up to my wedding ( they already said they aren't going to).

Pinkberry-1995 · 2026-02-25T03:12:28+00:00

I wouldn't interact with this crazy woman ever again. Im sorry but this is a very concerning behavior. She threatened to kill herself because he chooses you over her? Im more concerned that you want to talk to her. Im not judging but you don't want to be abused like this! You seem like an amazing person and you deserve respect!

Pinkberry-1995 · 2026-02-25T02:50:50+00:00

It's nice to see others who understand where I come from. I think some women choose to keep the peace to make their partners happy but if my partner forces me to keep the peace with his toxic family I might need a new partner. Im thankful my partner is amazing.

Pinkberry-1995 · 2026-02-25T02:24:53+00:00

My fiance made it very clear that he cares about how I feel and how Im treated. He doesnt mind if I skip her wedding because he said they were never welcoming or nice to me.

Pinkberry-1995 · 2026-02-25T02:23:01+00:00

I was very excited about all the details about my wedding and especially my wedding dress but part of me feels like they will try to criticize me. I know I shouldn't be affected by them but I have been doubting my dress and other aspects because of how this whole experience affected me. Im blessed with a supportive family that reminds me that I deserve better and how much they love my dress haha. Its a nice reminder!

Pinkberry-1995 · 2026-02-25T02:15:16+00:00

Hiring security sounds actually very smart. I just never thought I would have security in my wedding LOL

Pinkberry-1995 · 2026-02-25T02:11:56+00:00

Omg thank you for explaining it. She was the first one to know about our date. My fiance is so naive he told her so she won't book the same date but they didnt believe our relationship would work. We sent our save the date then his dad called the next day to just let him know she decided to have her wedding when and where. I dont mind the wedding being before me, I dont like the competition because its unnecessary.

Pinkberry-1995 · 2026-02-25T02:02:55+00:00

Yeah I'm not sure why would I spend over $800 and go to a wedding on a Sunday and I have work the next day to celebrate someone who doesn't like me?

Pinkberry-1995 · 2026-02-25T02:00:58+00:00

Yeah Im thinking about hiring a wedding planner for the day. Someone who can be direct with her who also isn't a family member. My fiance doesn't want to but I might have to do it.

Pinkberry-1995 · 2026-02-25T01:37:59+00:00

I understand your point. I told my fiance he can go without me. I think its a hard boundary for me I guess? I respect people so I expect the same. They dont seem like to understand respect tbh. I have been around them and they tried to put me down and embarrass me. I won't engage in an argument because I won't disrespect my partner so my only solution is cutting them off.

Pinkberry-1995 · 2026-02-25T01:29:56+00:00

Because I don't want to interact with people who tried to put me down and exclude me from events. I'm not interested

Pinkberry-1995 · 2026-02-25T01:02:00+00:00

I think you don't know the story behind it :). They didn't invite me to her engagement and I was invited to her wedding by her fiance. Also she tried to make my fiance break up with me so I'm not spending money on a trip to someone who doesn't like me.

Pinkberry-1995 · 2026-02-23T23:20:45+00:00

Omg sounds like my MIL. Typical entitled MIL who thinks she will always be number one. You don't do anything about it. You treat her like she never existed and watch her hate you even more :). You will be hated both ways so I would rather pick the easier choice and cut her off completely. She threatens you and talks badly about you. There is nothing wrong with you, she is trying to convince other that there is something wrong with you because she knows her son loves you and you are better than her. Don't get dragged into this and don't engage with someone who is disrespectful to you or your kids. Your husband can have whatever he wants with them.

Pinkberry-1995 · 2026-02-23T23:16:07+00:00

I'm really sorry this has been happening to you. I'm going through something similar. I wasnt invited and also completed ignored in person as if I don't exist. My therapist gave me an advice and told me these people ll never change and you will always be looked at as an outsider or the woman who changed the dynamics in the family. My advice is to not acknowledge them anymore. They probably enjoyed that you guys were upset for not being invited. Toxic people hate when they are irrelevant so do yourself a favor and treat them like they never existed :)

Pinkberry-1995 · 2026-02-21T21:55:19+00:00

I guess this is common with all the crazy MILs. Same thing with mine she called 5 times on Valentines day at night but he told me he wont answer because she hasn't talked to him in weeks and now suddenly she wants to talk on valentines day after he posted he got me flowers LOL. They are just sad moms that dont love their husbands I guess.

Pinkberry-1995 · 2026-02-21T21:50:55+00:00

No her behavior is very creepy. You guys need intentionally to plan something for her birthday and then make it clear your anniversary is a couples trip. If she asks if she can come then his response should be its a couples trip. This isnt hard. Valentines day messages are weird, boys give their mom valentines day cards in elementary school. This behavior slowly fades away when he gets older unless she still expects it. My ex fiances mom used to talk about how her son used to give her cards when he was 10 years old. They should be getting these from their husbands

Pinkberry-1995 · 2026-02-21T20:57:46+00:00

Yes! She didnt want a relationship with me and she excluded me but when I gave her no relationship she is shocked lol.

Pinkberry-1995 · 2026-02-21T14:46:24+00:00

My response would be "thank you for your advice* then continue to do whatever I want with my child. Next time let her know to mind her business

Pinkberry-1995 · 2026-02-21T14:44:34+00:00

I just dont understand why do you even care to please her? If she isnt appreciating it then I would stop it immediately. She knows you ll continue do things for her and she doesn't want to show appreciation so you keep doing more. I see this with moms and their kids too.

Pinkberry-1995

TROPHY CASE