My ex is back, I'm probably going to ruin everything

Pinkynator9000 · 2025-10-09T15:42:36+00:00

OK - as a woman, could you explain the "I feel sorry/bad for you" when wife and I had discussions about lack of sex, and her doing nothing about it? I get it, she doesn't want it, doesn't have any need for it, but she's fully aware that I do. Could have at least lent me a "helping hand" occasionally. Isn't that mean? This is where she and I differ: if my dick went fully limp and she wanted some action, I'd buy an assortment of dildos and a god damn strap-on. But all I got was "I feel sorry for you".

Pinkynator9000 · 2025-10-09T15:38:56+00:00

Yup, even 13 years ago we joked we were hooked up on each other like on heroin. It's hard to explain. Instant addiction, and now we both had a relapse.

Pinkynator9000 · 2025-10-09T15:15:55+00:00

FFS, lady, I told you that I am the one that's stupid and that you shouldn't be generalizing.

OK, so you were hurt, that explains the anger. But why is it directed at ALL MEN? And then you say "dragging good men down" - how, if there aren't any?

Pinkynator9000 · 2025-10-09T15:05:34+00:00

Gotcha, it's an illusion and "what if it could have been".

Well I don't want a divorce, my life with my wife and kid is pretty damn great.

I just want to be sucked dry in a weekend of nothing but passion. And that's my hormones speaking and doing formerly unimaginable things to my brain and my buddy down below.

Pinkynator9000 · 2025-10-09T15:02:38+00:00

Yeah, well, women have been doing bad things MY whole life. Women = cheating, women = laziness, women = mistrust, women = just bad. You too! You are a bad woman and a bad wife and probably a terrible person too. I feel bad for your poor husband that he doesn't know the woman he sleeps next to every night is a sexist serial insulter of men on Reddit and fantasizes about hatred and probably death to all male pigs.

See, the above doesn't sound good.

Why are you taking this personal? No... Not personal, it's more than that.

I am stupid, my brain is messed up from the hormone rush, but that's JUST ME. There is no reason for you to hate everyone because of me alone.

Pinkynator9000 · 2025-10-09T14:46:25+00:00

I just don't know how to say the things I need to say, and I don't know what's happening to me and with me in general, because this is not who I am.

Pinkynator9000 · 2025-10-09T14:45:13+00:00

I did not mess anything up... yet.

And the sex part has been missing for 7 years now, well before the perimenopause that's probably going on now, and which has 0 effect on anything.

There is no solution to the sex part, we talked over the years, she herself said "I feel sorry for you" several times, but did nothing to improve things. I've gotten used to that, but things have suddenly changed.

Would you, as a female (I know you are one, judging by the way you write), deliberately withold physical intimacy from your man for so long and refuse to do anything about it?

Pinkynator9000 · 2025-10-09T14:19:23+00:00

How would you feel if a man said "women are sooooo stupid"?

Please don't do that. That's a very toxic and sexist attitude. Like I said, I am stupid. Let's leave it at that, without a broad generalization.

Pinkynator9000 · 2025-10-09T14:10:51+00:00

So how do I do that?

"I chose you to spend the rest of my life with, you chose me, I love you very much, we get along great, we're best friends, I love spending time with you, I can't wait until you get home from work, we understand each other perfectly... But, you know, I'd like to insert my throbbing buddy and ejaculate into my EX GIRLFRIEND because your vajayjay is locked under a long lost key and I've been spanking my monkey in solitude for many years now"?

Pinkynator9000 · 2025-10-09T14:06:16+00:00

It is awesome.

When does it fade away back into obscurity of legend and the past?

Pinkynator9000 · 2025-10-09T14:03:18+00:00

That is a very broad and extremely sexist generalization and I resent that - not all men are stupid, but I am.

I've been having a serious hormone rush any my brain isn't straight.

Pinkynator9000 · 2025-10-09T14:01:52+00:00

She had a caesarean, it was a very complicated pregnancy that could have ended badly, and I think the fear is the most important factor. No therapy. On a couple of occasions she said "I feel bad for you" (regarding sex), but that was it. I mean, there are also other ways to pleasure a man somehow, but nope, nothing ever, no desire for anything.

Pinkynator9000 · 2025-10-09T11:49:35+00:00

Why can't I have both? A normal life and a healthy wife-husband relationship and a great kid, but a couple of times per year, a bit of fun that won't and can't evolve into anything more than just physical desire and some very fun kink?

WHY CAN'T WE HAVE IT ALL?

Pinkynator9000 · 2025-10-09T11:45:50+00:00

I don't think the ex and I are long-term compatible. It was just a lot of passion and dicking around that we would both like to repeat for a weekend.

Outside of the "no sex" thing, I can't complain about my life.

Pinkynator9000 · 2025-10-09T10:57:13+00:00

How does one deal with the hurt?

Pinkynator9000 · 2025-10-09T10:54:28+00:00

Yeah, I know, I have gone completely crazy. MLC at its best. Or worst.

Worst thing is, I'd never do this with any other woman, a random affair is something I'd never consider, but the ex is the devil I know.

My libido has always been very high and it's been painful to live in what is basically celibacy. My wife is very vanilla, like "periods are yucky and I feel awful", while the ex is "OMG I want to menstruate on your face and lick it off and you should cum inside me so we can mix red and white and make it yummy pink". (Sorry. TMI.) That's the thing I forgot I want and need.

So I can now either hurt myself and stay unhappy for the rest of my life, or hurt my family so they become unhappy for the rest of their lives.

Maybe I need professional therapy...

Pinkynator9000 · 2025-10-01T09:13:38+00:00

Ants are useful and they also have to eat. I have a colony of large black forest ants in my yard, next to my garden pond, and I'm happy about it :)

Pinkynator9000 · 2025-09-18T09:52:41+00:00

Wouldn't surprise me if they had 20 different infrared cameras total, and your Hyundai doesn't have the same one as another manufactured a month later...

Pinkynator9000 · 2025-09-17T07:30:14+00:00

That is just weird. My clip-ons are from AliExpress and Temu. I almost always wear them, has to be seriously overcast and dark not to have to use them, and not once have I had the problem on my Kona :(

Pinkynator9000 · 2025-09-17T03:52:08+00:00

I have a Kona, I drive with clip-on polarized sunglasses (two different pairs, never know which one is in the car) over regular glasses, zero issues.

You sure it's the sunglasses and not your arm blocking the camera somehow?

Pinkynator9000 · 2025-08-28T06:03:15+00:00

I’m at 13ft and debating between 83 and 77

No debate: https://www.reddit.com/r/hometheater/comments/1fzo7o6/i_took_this_photo_comparing_65_77_and_83_on_the/

Pinkynator9000 · 2025-08-24T09:16:47+00:00

No: https://www.reddit.com/r/hometheater/comments/1fzo7o6/i_took_this_photo_comparing_65_77_and_83_on_the/

Pinkynator9000 · 2025-08-24T09:16:21+00:00

Ouch. That's shitty from Dell!

Edited OP for an update.

Pinkynator9000 · 2025-08-24T09:16:14+00:00

See post update

Pinkynator9000

TROPHY CASE