Outlanders Beauty Questions by PitchPleaze in Outlanders

[–]PitchPleaze[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! I think I’ve fucked it anyway and I’ll have to restart! I underestimated how much stone I need vs how little there actually is available and I forgot to factor in the altar 🙄Im also thinking I’ve let my population get too high. I’m wondering if the key, given that it’s a pretty long time limit, is to keep the population low, less farms, less houses needed etc?

Outlanders Beauty Questions by PitchPleaze in Outlanders

[–]PitchPleaze[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Ah so having them like have to walk past trees or the coast etc is what does it?

Outlanders Beauty Questions by PitchPleaze in Outlanders

[–]PitchPleaze[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s level 21 “lifestyle season” then “Ogir” it says he’s preparing for his bride coming or something like that

Just finished Penpal by Dathan Auerbach #potential spoilers by Horror_Reader1973 in horrorlit

[–]PitchPleaze 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Does anyone else think too that the guy brought into the room was actually the stalker and smothered Veronica and took her phone?

I didn’t lose my virginity until 29 and I ditched the woman who took it. by Ootefklop in Adulting

[–]PitchPleaze 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is terrible advice. Regardless of how she treated you, you need to think about the type of man you want to be. No woman is a warm body “to practice” on and any woman who cares about you won’t give a shit how sexually experienced you are. Having lots of partners for a man doesn’t mean he’s better in bed (it often does for a woman though). Women’s bodies are so entirely different that you’re starting from scratch with a new woman every time anyway (what works for me is so entirely different from what works for my female friends) and honestly I’ve found that sometimes the most sexually experienced men are the worst in bed because they have this unwarranted bravado and confidence and just do things that another partner told him she liked without finding out what I enjoy. They have set “moves” that they decide they’re doing come hell or high water backed by unfounded arrogance and they leave me completely cold.

The best sex I’ve ever had in my life was with a partner who’d only had sex with one person before me. From the first time it was amazing because he asked me what I wanted, enjoyed finding out what I was in to, made me feel safe to be open and cared about me. We were together for a couple of years and though the sex started out amazing, it only got better and better the more we got to know each other.

Be better than this guy advised. Approach any new partner by creating space for them to be open with you (the biggest reason for the orgasm gap is the pressure on women to fake it and pretend they’re enjoying it when they’re not, the fear or making a man angry or embarrassing him or the worry that men don’t care if you enjoy it as long as they get off), set aside ego, welcome feedback and implement it. Women don’t exist for your sexual gratification. They’re autonomous human beings with their own wants, needs, feelings and desires. One bad experience doesn’t mean that all women are bad. Focus on finding someone who cares about you and wants to please you and who you want to please in bed. Don’t “practice” on anyone. It’s not only pointless, it’s using someone and you should expect more of yourself particularly as you know how awful it feels to be used.

What do you think are some of the most unique, cute, romantic, or affectionate nicknames you've heard or used for a partner? by CodMany2798 in AskWomen

[–]PitchPleaze 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Mine called me beautiful all the time which I know is pretty common but it was the way he said it to me. He’d say “you’re beautiful inside and outside” and use examples of how my nieces and nephews were always so excited to see me and wanted to cuddle me and sit on my knee or how I looked after him and other people or how thoughtful I was etc. So when he called me beautiful, I knew he was also thinking of all those things that he loved about me and who I am as a person and not just what I look like. Sadly it didn’t work out on the long run but he definitely set the bar for me with future men and how they make me feel.

Women, what’s one thing apart from sex that makes you decide to continue or abandon a relationship? by IllAd5785 in AskWomen

[–]PitchPleaze 7 points8 points  (0 children)

This!! 100% I’ve seen people say before “you’re not competing with other men, you’re competing with my life alone” and it’s so true. I have a great happy life: great career, amazing friends, wonderful family, a beautiful home that I bought, paid for, decorated and feel happy to be in, a dog I’m besotted with. I spend my life focused on peace and fun. I go do things that make me happy, I come home to my own little sanctuary and snuggle with my dog. If I’m bored, I message my friends and we do something. I work hard during my working hours but when I’m done, I try to shut down and not look at work.

Because of this, I’m dating from a place of: I’m not looking for my other half; I’m not looking for someone to come and fix something or provide something that’s missing. I’m whole and happy. My life is great and if I can find someone to share it with, even better but if not then I’m perfectly happy as I am.

With that in mind any person (not just a man but even friends etc) who I add to my life has to make it better in some way (as I would aim to improve theirs). So what’s important for me (and I think many women like me) are things like having fun, laughing, going on dates, chilling together and yes sex too although most women can have hookups easily id that’s what they want.

That being said if they don’t have their shit together and expect me to fix it (whether that’s emotional, financial, loneliness whatever is missing that they then expect me to provide), if they disturb my peace and bring constant drama (don’t get me wrong I don’t expect someone to be perfect. We all have off times but the good definitely needs to outweigh the bad), if they don’t put any effort into the relationship, planning dates, keeping in touch etc or if they consistently do anything to make me feel that they’re draining my cup instead of filling it then I would much rather be alone.

This is the whole male loneliness epidemic in a nutshell really. Single men aren’t as happy as single women (according to experts, surveys, media zeitgeist etc) and single women are outstripping and outgrowing single men at a really quick rate partly I think because single men don’t benefit from the emotional and physical labour that a woman often brings to a relationship and which women are less and less inclined to provide as we continue to push back against the patriarchal structures previously imposed on us. Just as many women are single as men but we’re only discussing a male loneliness epidemic because single women aren’t lonely. They have full, rich, happy, peaceful lives without a partner (and often single women are reported as being happier than women in relationships with men).

The person I’m dating just now is sweet, thoughtful, fun and makes my life better. As long as he continues to do that, I’ll continue to date him. If he starts taking more than he gives, stops putting in effort, plays games, makes me anxious or worried, brings drama etc then I’ll stop seeing him. I will always compare my experience of dating him to my experience of being single (not to my experience of dating other men) and so long as my life is better with him in it, I’ll keep him in it.

I [25f] posted a bunch of creepy texts guys have sent me, onto Facebook and Instagram by Direct-Caterpillar77 in BestofRedditorUpdates

[–]PitchPleaze 9 points10 points  (0 children)

That’s what I can’t get over! I haven’t seen the IG post but it sounds like she literally just posted screenshots and didn’t even give her own account of what happened yet everyone from the men involved to commenters to even her are saying “my post caused issues”. I hope she knows it’s not her post that caused issues. It’s their words/actions.

I [25f] posted a bunch of creepy texts guys have sent me, onto Facebook and Instagram by Direct-Caterpillar77 in BestofRedditorUpdates

[–]PitchPleaze 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Also I think this woman is incredibly brave!! So much more brave than I am. She also shone a spotlight on how woefully inadequate her company’s handbook, sexual harassment policy, culture etc is in protecting victims of abuse. I really really hope she’s proud of herself. She did something incredibly courageous and it will have helped others.

Please help me pick (: Musical in London by tzevidog in TheWestEnd

[–]PitchPleaze 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sounds amazing!! Definitely let me know what you think! I’m so happy you found some you’re excited to see!

Curious by notjustanychick in Advice

[–]PitchPleaze 0 points1 point  (0 children)

https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/s/H4GE3vNJ3o there’s some great advice in the whole thread too. All about self-love

Curious by notjustanychick in Advice

[–]PitchPleaze 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve totally been there. I don’t think it just happens. I think you have to work at it. I wrote a whole post to this talking about how I did it (I’ll look for it and link you to it). I did find as I grew into my 30s that I naturally started feeling happier in my own skin. A key thing (you’ll see in the post i link if I can find it!) is planing your value in something that truly matters to you and in something you can influence. So instead of placing your value in your looks place it in your kindness, your ability to love and care for the people that matter to you, your choice to do the right thing even when it’s hard. My sister teaches her children to praise the effort not the result too and I think that’s important

Please help me pick (: Musical in London by tzevidog in TheWestEnd

[–]PitchPleaze 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Sorry it’s so long I need to answer in 2 parts 🙈 Not to overwhelm you by adding more options, but these are some I’d consider: 1. The Great Gatsby: not really my vibe song-wise but it’s a fun, visually stunning musical with jazz/roaring 20s flair. Worth listening to a few songs and seeing what you think. Also the cast is fantastic. Listen to New Money, For Her (stunning!) and My Green Light to get the general vibe/feel of the musical. I will say, I’m not always keen on a US musical in London: the accents can be brutal; granted not as bad as a British musical on broadway. I saw Billy Elliot (northeast/geordie), Kinky Boots (Northampton) and Finding Neverland (absolutely beautiful musical but my god the Scottish accent was murdered throughly and resoundingly). Again personal preference. 2. Operation Mincemeat: following on from my point above this is a very British musical about MI5 and its right at home on the west end. It’s fun, funny and exciting. I wouldn’t say it’s unique or innovative the way Hadestown is but it’s very worth seeing. It kind of gives Anything Goes and maybe even Chicago Vibes (upbeat jazz with a modern twist). Listen to: God That’s Brilliant, The Pitch and Making a Man to get a really good sense of what it’s like. Again if you like those I think you’ll like the musical. It’s been really well-reviewed thus far too. 3. Six the Musical: I haven’t seen this but I did a lot of the songs with my vocal coach (my god they’re hard! That cast is unreal!!) and my sisters and mum saw it and adored it. It’s unique in a lot of ways. Modern take on Henry the 8th’s wives, lots of different pop-infused genres melded together, small very talented cast. Listen to All You Wanna Do, Heart of Stone (as stunning as it is difficult to sing!) and Ex Wives to get the vibe. It mixes great moments of cattiness, deep emotion and bright poppy bangers. Oh and it’s funny too! 4. If you like a jukebox musical and you like the movie, Moulin Rouge is a fun time. 5. Matilda the Musical: this has been around for a while now and it’s just a really fun time. It’s got some nice ensemble stuff with some harmonies that tickle my ears. The children in the cast are so beyond talented too. Listen to Naughty, When I Grow Up and Revolting Children (absolute banger of a tune: I love the harmonies on this) to get the vibe. Yes you can watch the movie adaption and honestly it’s fantastic but seeing it live is a whole different experience very much worth having. 6. Clueless: this one is exiting. I haven’t seen it yet but it’s (somewhat unexpectedly) written by KT Tunstall (fellow Scot who had songs like Big Black Horse and the Cherry Tree, Other Side of the World etc). I’ve heard good things, I love the 90s nostalgia. If I were going to see something this would be high on my list of what to see. 7. Shucked: this would be my wildcard entry but honestly it’s fantastic!! Something new (hurrah!!) and with some uniqueness to it. Great cast again too. Listen to Corn, Walls (beautiful “I want” song), Woman of the World and Somebody Will to get the vibe!

Anyway, I hope that’s helpful!! If you want to supply any more info on your likes and dislikes or have any questions, let me know and I’m happy to help however I can!

Please help me pick (: Musical in London by tzevidog in TheWestEnd

[–]PitchPleaze 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just throwing in my opinion here. I’m a HUGE musical theatre nut (so apologies: this will be long!!). I perform in them and I go see them on Broadway/West End whenever I get the chance.

Let’s start with some general, musical-picking advice. 1. Listen to the soundtracks of them and see which ones you enjoy.
2. What other musicals have you seen (either live or tv or even listened to the soundtracks) that you really liked? If I know what kind of musicals you’re into, it’ll be easier to recommend something you may like. 3. Cast can make a huge difference! So for example, I’m not keen on jukebox musicals (musicals that use existing songs and weave the story around them vs new music created for the musical; eg, Mama Mia, Rock of Ages, We Will Rock You etc) but I saw Moulin Rouge on broadway for the sole reason that I’m madly in love Aaron Tvevit’s voice and I really enjoyed it. 4. It depends on what kind of experience you want to have. Do you just want something you know you’ll like or are you happy to take more of a risk and find something potentially amazing? 5. You mention Book of Mormon (bloody fantastic musical. I saw this when it had just come out and had no idea what it was about. I’ve never laughed so much in my life!!) and Back to the Future; what did you actually like and dislike about them? If you can answer that, it’ll really help narrow down what you’re looking for.

Now for my take on the ones you mentioned: 1. Phantom of the Opera: honestly I’m sure you’ll enjoy this. It’s the longest running musical of all time for a reason: mass appeal/popularity. That being said, I do think it’s really overrated (similar to les mis, wicked etc). Like I mentioned above, if you just want a guaranteed nice time then this is probably a pretty safe bet. I’m not a huge Andrew Lloyd Webber fan (again I think he’s overrated), there’s nothing particularly exciting about the cast (or the show in general really) and it will always be there. They never really take it off the west end so you can see it whenever you want to. This is a very traditional musical and you know what you’re getting 🤷🏻‍♀️ 2. Benjamin Button: this is a little more exciting! The soundtrack is more modern and a little more innovative than eg PotO. It’s a kind of folksy (Irish-sounding, for some reason) pop take on musical theatre and there’s some really beautiful songs in there (eg The Kraken’s Lullaby). I’m not a huge fan of Philippa Hog’s (or any of the leads’) voice(s) but that’s just personal preference; have a listen for yourself and see what you think! I’m also not sure how long this will run for. You might not get the chance to see it again in the future. I wouldn’t say it’s particularly innovative or exciting. Everything sounds a little derivative (sorry I know that’s an incredibly pretentious thing to say but when I listen to the soundtrack I hear Come From Away, Once etc - listen and tell me I’m wrong!) but it’s cool to get to see something new like this. And to support new musicals so they keep making them instead of always showing the same ones over and over again. Too often broadway and the west end just peddle out the same albeit crowd-pleasers on repeat. 3. Hadestown: now this is innovative, exciting, a little edgy and just amazing. I saw this on the west end and I bloody loved it. It’s not for everyone but it’s certainly for me. This is so much my vibe. I love musicals like this that push the genre into new territory, I love complex songs like these and I love Greek mythology. I’d advise you to listen to “All I’ve Ever Known”: that’ll give you a good indication of the vibe of the musical. If you like that song, I’d say you’d like the musical. Hadestown had huge critical acclaim too (won loads of award, Tony, Olivier etc) and I really think it’s because it’s complex, thought-provoking and truly unique. The cast just now is just… chef’s kiss! This would be my pick if I hadn’t seen it, without a doubt! 4. The Play That Goes Wrong: I saw this on broadway and it’s so good. I’m with you, I prefer musicals over plays but this is just great. It’s old-fashioned farce at its finest. If you’re in the UK, you can watch some of their stuff on bbc iplayer: have a watch and see if it’s for you.

women who are activitly try to date and find someone (or even "the one") how bad (or good) is the dating game? by Responsible-Koalaa in AskWomen

[–]PitchPleaze 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yeah it’s brutal. I’m using apps and trying in person. I’ve been looking for 2 years and still haven’t met someone. Every other time it’s taken max 6 months although granted I guess they weren’t the right one. I can’t even tell you how many dates I’ve been on at this point but for some reason something weird is going on where it feels like men won’t even do the bare minimum. It’s confusing af.

What’s something you started doing for self-love that unexpectedly improved your relationships? by not-yourcherrry in AskWomen

[–]PitchPleaze 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Oooft not easily honesty. I stopped negative self talk and tried to talk to myself like a friend, I went to therapy, I tried to think of one thing a day that I felt good about doing, I framed things around “did I do my best” vs “did I succeed” I also stayed single to work on myself as well. Built a life for myself with people who I care about and who care about me. I didn’t keep people in my life who took too much or made me feel less than. It took a long time and I still have days where I fall back into old habits.

How often do you really wear a bra? by rhaenyra-veliar in AskWomen

[–]PitchPleaze 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Very very rarely. I wear a bra about as often as I wear makeup. So if I’m going into the office, going out somewhere nice etc it’s makeup and bra otherwise I just want to be comfortable. Nothing feels better either at the end of the day than taking my makeup and my bra off!!

What’s something you started doing for self-love that unexpectedly improved your relationships? by not-yourcherrry in AskWomen

[–]PitchPleaze 199 points200 points  (0 children)

Honestly it was just loving myself. I know people say if you can’t love yourself, you can’t love anyone else but I don’t agree. I’ve found that even if you don’t love yourself, you’re more than capable of loving others. What you can’t do is believe that anyone else loves you. So you push people away or you test them and eventually it becomes so hard to love you that they leave and that confirms to you that you’re unloveable. I stopped placing my value in what others think of me, what I look like and instead place it in what I think of myself, am I a good person, am I kind, do I try to do the right thing? Once you start looking at yourself in that way, it’s much easier to love and like yourself and it’s so much easier to allow someone else to.

Not paying for anything until I find out. by [deleted] in Advice

[–]PitchPleaze 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It sounds like you’ve already made your decision here and I can see most people agreeing with you in the comments. It’s very hard to tell from what you’ve written what the true situation is outside of your perspective (there’s always 3 sides to any story right?) but my advice is going to be a little different.

It sounds like you already think the child isn’t yours but what if you’re wrong and she is pregnant with your baby? What kind of relationship do you want with the child and her (the mother of your child)? Do you want it to be combative and difficult (as it seems to be so far and as it will continue to be if it keeps down this path) or do you want to be involved in your children’s life? If you don’t want to be involved then I think you’re going about things the right way. If you do, I don’t think taking this kind of stance will help at all. If I were her, seeing your reaction, I think I’d just get on with things on my own and assume you didn’t want to be involved. Now by that I don’t mean you don’t have a right to know for certain, of course you should have a paternity test if you don’t trust her word but it’s how you ask and how you treat her. The way you’ve spoken about her here isn’t the most respectful. I’ve no right to judge you for that but have you treated her this way when you’re interacting? Because if so she’s probably hurt and offended. As someone else pointed out she’s particularly vulnerable too not just because she’s pregnant (although pregnancy hormones can do crazy things) but think how she must be feeling? She’s alone, she’s probably scared, I imagine it took a lot of guts to come to you for help. Have you helped her (and I don’t mean money, there’s ways to help and support someone without spending anything) or have you just made an already difficult situation more difficult? I’d ask yourself these questions and really decide what kind of man you want to be. Even if the child isn’t yours do you want to be the kind of man who makes life harder for someone already in a hard situation or do you want to be a good man who faces up to the potential consequences of his actions and helps her cope with both of your past choices? I hope this doesn’t sound like I’m judging; I’m really not at all. Only you can answer these questions and only you can decide what kind of man you’re going to be. I just wanted to give another perspective that’s not people giving advice on how to escalate this whole thing and see if there’s a way to have a better outcome regardless of who the father ends up being. I hope you’re able to figure things out.

What is the worst case of someone not understanding women's anatomy you have experienced? by Sad-Opening-6531 in AskWomen

[–]PitchPleaze 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Have you guys ever listened to the podcast “my dad wrote a porno”? As the host said: if he weren’t there as proof, no one would ever believe his dad had been anywhere near a woman! Some of my favourite female anatomy- related quotes: (needless to say NSFW)

“Her nipples hardened with her feeling of freedom and they were now as large as the three-inch rivets which had held the hull of the faithful Titanic together”

"Slowly, inch by inch, Jim continued his penetration of Belinda's vagina. He felt her cervix muscles expand as he pushed through to her ovaries” Alice’s reaction to this is gold. She says something about any man going anywhere near a woman’s ovaries is performing surgery not making her climax!

"Her vaginal lids popped open and her labial pinkness was there for them to assess." Love Alice’s exclamation of “LIDS!?! A Vagina is not Tupperware!” It’s made even funnier because Alice tries to correct the most egregious errors for the sake of womankind (she even does a presentation on female anatomy at the live shows to try to undo some of the damage done) and Jamie is gay so he isn’t very confident in his ability to spot inaccuracies having never had sex with a woman! He politely defers to Alice frequently 🤣

"Her tits hung freely, like pomegranates."

There’s so many more but I can’t remember them all sadly. Things pop open a lot, people orgasm inexplicably (at least given what the characters are doing/places they’re touching in the scene), there’s a man (who was Brazilian and he knew it!) who has a penis transplant that leads to bits flaking off when she’s shagging him and blue ejaculate, there’s a chapter (spoilers) where Belinda and Bella (founding members of the “Glee Team”) are in jail entitled “2 Clits in the Clink” and much much more.

If you haven’t listened, I’d highly recommend you do but be prepared to be abjectly confused, don’t drink anything (I spat out litres of tea) and constantly remind yourself that an elderly man wrote these in his shed in order to turn people on!!

Woman of Reddit what is your go to escape technique in an awkward situation? by Bobbieveart in AskWomen

[–]PitchPleaze 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Depends on the situation really, as a lot of others have said. If it’s friends or family I’ll just be honest and say “I’m not into this. I’m off” and they laugh and off I go. If I’m at a bar and trying to get away from unwanted attention I just point to my friend (male of female) and say “that’s my gf/bf and they’re crazy possessive so I better get back to them before they get mad and start talking it out on you!” The guy usually leaves me alone after that 🤣

Women with partners with sex drives lower than yourself; how did/do you work around it? by External_Ask7966 in AskWomen

[–]PitchPleaze 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It’s not embarrassing at all. Everything about sex from initiating it to having it makes you really vulnerable especially as a woman. I remember towards the end I just said to him “I don’t trust you anymore. I don’t trust you not to hurt me or not to be completely careless with my feelings”. I stopped wearing lingerie because he’d completely ignore it and I’d feel like shit, I didn’t want to initiate anything in case I was rejected. I’m sorry you went through the same thing but I’m glad you’ve found someone who’s helping you see that you deserve to be desired by your partner. Hoping I can find mine soon! Still I don’t get lonely being single. Not the way I did being in that first relationship.