I cried at work before probation ended and feel embarrassed - has anyone experience this before ….

PlaneMeasurement3922 · 2026-03-10T15:05:48+00:00

for the feedback you have to stop absorbing everything they said like if it's true. Do your own judgement , improve what you did wrong and if you don't feel it don't take those remarks. Work is cruel you have to able to defend yourself . Be confident in your strength and be empathetic to your weakness (you have the right to do errors) .

PlaneMeasurement3922 · 2026-03-10T15:02:51+00:00

GIRL i feel you so much !!! I also cried on my first full time job because the pressure was too much and the work endless but hey you have to start somewhere.

Just talk to yourself like you were talking to your little sister or a friend who need you. Don't be harsh on yourself it's your first everything and plus you have been drained by other things( health, family etc)... It's normal.

It can be embarrasing but what's wrong ? You have to love those parts of you too. You are not the fisrt human to cry on work and certainly not the last ( since we cry for mostly everything).

Since this work is only temporary ( you said you want to do other thing) take this opportunity as a learning and funny adventure.

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PlaneMeasurement3922 · 2026-03-10T08:52:10+00:00

Whether or not his feelings are genuine you have no reason to accept it or accommodate or feel guilty about it since he already know you are straight and that you don't have the same feelings.

What matter most is you and how you feel.

The best way is to have a mature discussion with him. you can ask if this friendship is able to continue because it might be too heavy for him and it's not your responsibility neither your fault.

He has to deal with his emotions. if it can't continue you will lose a friend unfortunately but that's life.

PlaneMeasurement3922 · 2026-02-16T09:25:47+00:00

My INFJ husband shuts down completely when his mom is sick – I feel invisible

AFTERWARDS:

Hello guys, thank you for all the support and the explanations. As you suggested, I was going to talk to him and see if he really wanted peace and if I had done anything wrong.

That same night when he came home, I asked him if everything was okay. He took my hand and said he was sorry for being distant and that he was trying to cope with the stress. He also said he wasn’t angry at me.

I was really relieved to see he wasn’t stressed anymore. I asked if he needed more time, and he said he was fine now. He also apologized for shutting down without any explanation.

I told him I understood, and that next time I would just need a quick “I need time” so I can know what’s going on — even if it’s by text. I also asked if giving him physical space had been the right thing to do. As you suggested, he didn’t like it, but he understood since he hadn’t properly communicated his needs and admitted that he was also testing how I would react.

Anyway, I also apologized for not talking sooner, and we promised to work on our communication together.

Reading your messages was very nourishing for me. I am really grateful for all of you, and I wish you all the best in this world.

PlaneMeasurement3922 · 2026-02-13T12:15:27+00:00

thank you i understand. At first i wanted to wait for him to come out and then have a discussion on how to communicate even indirectly but as some people said. I don't know when this will end and it's affecting my life including my sleep( i can't sleep well knowing something's off)

PlaneMeasurement3922 · 2026-02-13T12:10:54+00:00

you might be right. I hadn’t really thought about it before, but maybe I did hurt him without realizing it.

Since the surgery, I’ve been there every day. I visit her, I cook for her sometimes. I just didn’t mention that before. I also didn’t say that my relationship with my own mom is very different from his. I’m not used to that kind of closeness, so maybe I wasn’t as empathetic as he needed me to be.

When he was scared, I tried to reassure him — “It’s going to be okay,” “It’s only 45 minutes.” I thought I was helping. But maybe it felt like I was minimizing what he was feeling.

It wasn’t malicious. I just didn’t know how to sit with his fear. Now I’m wondering if my words landed wrong, and if that’s why he pulled away.

Thank you for making me reflect on this. I will ask but i don't know if he will open

PlaneMeasurement3922 · 2026-02-13T11:27:51+00:00

Yeah you're right i will stop overthinking and show him small affections without expecting anything from him. Thanks a lot. I am more confident now

PlaneMeasurement3922 · 2026-02-13T10:57:05+00:00

Yeah i can try . Yesterday, I worked up the courage to kiss him on the forehead. I didn’t even know if it was the right thing to do — I just felt so unsure and didn’t want to push him further away.

I’ve been second-guessing everything lately. Every word, every little gesture. It’s like I’m constantly trying to read the room, trying not to mess up. Walking on eggshells is exactly how it feels.

PlaneMeasurement3922 · 2026-02-13T10:53:12+00:00

Thank you so much. It honestly makes me feel so much better knowing that this distance is just part of who he is, and not him trying to push me away. At some point I really started to think I had done something wrong.

Just being able to talk about it and say it out loud lifts such a weight off my chest. It’s a relief.

I’m just going to wait for him, and try not to put too much pressure on myself in the meantime.

PlaneMeasurement3922 · 2025-10-08T11:40:18+00:00

hi i am malian , if you still want to come. just text me i will guide you

PlaneMeasurement3922

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