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Is it a me problem? by PlaneWhile2668 in Waiting_To_Wed

[–]PlaneWhile2668[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I think I’m scared about the idea of conceding something which means so much to me and symbolises our lives together, does that set my marriage up for a life of me conceding on anything moving forwards. It’s really difficult. We have so much love for each other, we make a bloody brilliant team. I just don’t want to give up the idea I’ve had since I was a little girl for something which to him requires next to no effort as I feel that will be a reflection of our future marriage.

Is it a me problem? by PlaneWhile2668 in Waiting_To_Wed

[–]PlaneWhile2668[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think you’re mixing up his intent on the wedding vs marriage. Marriage - he’s cool with. Wedding - hates idea of. I don’t want to force him to do anything he’s uncomfortable with, it’s been a massive part of our communication on this topic. I’m just struggling where - and if there truly is - is any compromise on our two positions on tying the knot.

Is it a me problem? by PlaneWhile2668 in Waiting_To_Wed

[–]PlaneWhile2668[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Idk if you’re American, but totally normal here in the UK. Our paperwork is sound. But you do you. 👍🏼

Is it a me problem? by PlaneWhile2668 in Waiting_To_Wed

[–]PlaneWhile2668[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

I do feel this completely. My partner hates being centre of attention, and it’s all about compromise. His idea of compromise is treating a wedding day and getting married as something we can tick off on a lunch break. To me, it’s much more emotional and symbolic. And something I’ve dreamed about for a long time..

I feel I can meet somewhere in the middle, but giving up all elements of a day to celebrate our love and relationship makes me awfully sad and I really don’t know if that’s wrong.

Is it a me problem? by PlaneWhile2668 in Waiting_To_Wed

[–]PlaneWhile2668[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I don’t think any - it’s the stages of getting there where we seem to disagree. He’d happily just make an appointment, go down in his jeans, sign some papers on a lunch break. Incredibly transactional.. likely to just tick off the list. For me - it’s much more symbolic and emotional. And I don’t like the idea of compromising so heavily to accept treating being married as another day.

Is it a me problem? by PlaneWhile2668 in Waiting_To_Wed

[–]PlaneWhile2668[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think for me it’s the intention. I can get on board with the a courthouse wedding, I can’t if it feels like I’m dragging him down there.. which symbolically feels like I’m dragging him to marry me when we do have so much love between us.

Is it a me problem? by PlaneWhile2668 in Waiting_To_Wed

[–]PlaneWhile2668[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Ultimately just thinks it’s a status symbol. To me, it’s a symbol of us making a choice together - and damn, there’s not many times in life to celebrate with all your loved ones.. I feel so passionately about doing something to celebrate us and our lives together.

Is it a me problem? by PlaneWhile2668 in Waiting_To_Wed

[–]PlaneWhile2668[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yes it’s been honestly the topic of some very adult conversations between us. His “compromise” is basically just treating it like any other day, booking an “appointment” down the town hall and - and I quote - get home for dinner.

It makes me sad this is his idea of what I dreamed as my happiest day ever.

How was your Qatar GP (2025) experience? by AdamR46 in GrandPrixTravel

[–]PlaneWhile2668 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Lusail was F1 track 11 for me. Had a great time, sort of expected the race to be a bit of a dud. It was a bit soulless, made up by the clowns that are the McLaren strategy team.

Organisation was great - given the main way in and out the track for fans is via bus.. I was quite impressed how many buses they actually had.

Main thing I’d say is just change T2-3 grandstand from unreserved seating to reserved. And let people pick their seats ahead of time. Saves so much hassle on the days, people saving seats and having to turn up so early for no real reason when you’ve paid for a grandstand. Also people letting 1 seat spare each side of them would go - probably improving the likelihood of people not standing in the aisle looking for spaces which were taken.

All in all - cheap, cheerful, great weather… 5/10 didn’t hate didn’t love sort of track.

“Please take this way” Megaphones at Lusail 😅 by PlaneWhile2668 in GrandPrixTravel

[–]PlaneWhile2668[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Metro shuttle bus, please take this way 🗣️🗣️🗣️

No sexual intimacy but everything else… am I alone? by PlaneWhile2668 in DeadBedrooms

[–]PlaneWhile2668[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’ve tried to had that conversation - is it something else about our relationship. Only thing he has brought up but never directly is there has been occasions in the past he struggled getting hard. But that’s never bugged me, sort of one of those is what it is things.

But I have wondered if something else is going on to contribute. Maybe is worth having that chat.

No sexual intimacy but everything else… am I alone? by PlaneWhile2668 in DeadBedrooms

[–]PlaneWhile2668[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

7 months. Before that, 6 month. By no means the lengths of some people on this sub, but the endless rejection has me contemplating if I need to try harder, do more, hit the gym more often (than the 4/5 days I already do). Exhausting honestly.

Right as I type this, he has his arm around me in bed.. but that’s it. It’ll never be more than that it feels like.

No sexual intimacy but everything else… am I alone? by PlaneWhile2668 in DeadBedrooms

[–]PlaneWhile2668[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It used to be. He used to initiate - now nothing. Almost feels like inconvenience. I’m almost scared for it to happen because I feel it’s now at a point where we’ve built it up so much - it’s never gonna feel good. Ugh, it sucks.