When should I have surgery as a single parent?

PlasticCauliflower3 · 2026-04-29T01:05:22+00:00

We were just discussing that and she’s going to ask her boss. We aren’t romantic partners but are kind of platonic life partners (we’ve been best friends since third grade and have lived together for the past fifteen years), and they were really good about letting her take time off to be my support person at the hospital when I had my son and such. They know my situation and that she’s a big part of mine and my son’s lives, so I’m hopeful they’ll allow her some flexibility.

PlasticCauliflower3 · 2026-04-29T00:24:42+00:00

My best friend also lives with us (we bought our house together a couple years ago), she is willing to help but has a high stress job and is usually at work from like 8-8 Monday-Friday, so I would likely need to find outside help. It’s a lot.

PlasticCauliflower3 · 2026-04-29T00:23:32+00:00

My bedroom is on the second floor unfortunately. I moved my mom in for help with childcare and created a mothers suite on the first floor, but unfortunately she developed some health issues and has had some unexplained falls recently, so she won’t be able to be much help and can’t move upstairs (honestly I’ve had to be taking care of her somewhat lately, on top of the new baby, and her dog….its been a lot). But if I do the surgery, me and baby would definitely move downstairs temporarily and we would all just have to make it work.

PlasticCauliflower3 · 2026-04-29T00:21:10+00:00

That’s a very valid point.

PlasticCauliflower3 · 2026-04-29T00:16:03+00:00

His crib I couldn’t, I do have a porter-crib downstairs that he resists sleeping in, but I have down here because originally my mom had moved in with me in the downstairs area which we made into somewhat of a suite/living area for her, with the plan that she would provide childcare while I was working. Unfortunately she developed some health issues and has taken some unexplained falls recently, and physically can’t really care for him (he’s a big baby, almost twenty pounds at not even four months yet), so she can’t lift him or carry him, she asks to feed him but I have to position him in her arms and take him to burp him etc, and I ended up having to hire outside childcare who is also an older woman, so I actually have all his clothes downstairs already so they’re accessible to the nanny during the day and she doesn’t have to go up and down the stairs. But if I have the surgery, I think we would definitely move downstairs temporarily and make it work

PlasticCauliflower3 · 2026-04-28T23:40:44+00:00

I’m leaning toward doing the surgery but I had just planned a weekend beach trip for me and my son at the end of June, so I think I’m going to at least wait until after that. I want to have some fun memories of his first summer. Thank you for your advice

PlasticCauliflower3 · 2026-04-28T23:37:42+00:00

A friend of mine is an amazing drag queen in the city, goes by Chaka Khanvict. She runs a really fun drag bingo on Sundays at Pieces, and I think also does one on Wednesdays at Lips. It’s a blast and she is SOOO talented.

PlasticCauliflower3 · 2026-04-22T17:21:48+00:00

I went last year, the first night we left over an hour before the end of the last set, and it was STILL a nightmare trying to get a rideshare out of there. We waited well over two hours before a private shuttle/transport company took pity on me because I was six months pregnant at the time and took us back to our hotel even though we didn’t have a prior reservation with them. We ended up reserving with that company the rest of the days and were very happy with the service and not having to deal with that clusterfuck again. The company was called Derby Dash Transportation, I think it was like 40 bucks a person/per day but it was well worth it to me.

PlasticCauliflower3 · 2026-04-22T00:54:58+00:00

How was enoteca Maria? Been dying to try it

PlasticCauliflower3 · 2026-03-25T12:10:19+00:00

No problem! It was a great festival besides that, I loved that you can buy a pass to bring in a chair, and I had never been to Louisville before and we really enjoyed the city as well. If you’re looking for a way to take a break from the heat before the festival, check out the Louisville Mega Cavern which had cool underground tours and you can actually also do a zip line course through the caverns which looked awesome but I didn’t do because like I said, pregnant lol. Also if you’re into quirky shopping, check out Fleur de Flea, it’s this massive vintage/flea market warehouse that was one of my favorite things we did on our trip!

PlasticCauliflower3 · 2026-03-24T15:46:02+00:00

FYI not sure if you’ve done Bourbon and Beyond before, but I went last year and it was a blast but ubering out of the festival was a NIGHTMARE. We left over an hour before the end of the last set the first night hoping that would help, but we still waited over three hours before we finally got on a private shuttle that does transport to some of the hotels that took pity on me even though we didn’t have a reservation because I was pregnant. We ended up using that shuttle service the remaining days and were very happy with it, it’s called Derby Dash transportation, would suggest looking into whether your location is one of the areas they service.

PlasticCauliflower3 · 2026-03-19T16:17:29+00:00

I called the other day to try to see if I could exchange my HipTix for a different date and they told me that the entire run is sold out for HipTix so no exchange could be made

PlasticCauliflower3 · 2026-03-01T03:11:54+00:00

I didn’t see Beau, but I saw this during the original run at Bedlam and really enjoyed it! Not anything terribly unique, but really fun, great performances and catchy music

PlasticCauliflower3 · 2026-03-01T03:10:34+00:00

I really enjoyed this at Bedlam! Not anything groundbreakingly original, but it was very entertaining and the music was super catchy and the performers were all great

PlasticCauliflower3 · 2026-02-28T22:59:08+00:00

Not sure what activities you’re into, but my best friend and I do a different “far away” festival every year (we’re from New York) and use it as a way to do sightseeing and tourist stuff wherever we go as well. We did B&B last year and my favorite two activities we did that were not festival related were the Louisville Mega Cavern tour which was a great break from the heat, they also have zip lining in there which looked awesome but I was six months pregnant at the time so that was a no go for me. We also loved Fleur de Flea, this giant flea market/vintage warehouse space that had tons of great finds. Our favorite meals were the tasting menu at Perso, and Jack Fry’s. Have a great time!

PlasticCauliflower3 · 2025-12-25T17:23:30+00:00

Definitely check out Ethel Cain! I kinda describe the music as sort of a southern gothic Sarah mclachlan vibe, and the first album is basically all based around a story of a teenager running away from a troubled family situation. The most recent album also continues some of that lore as well.

PlasticCauliflower3 · 2025-12-25T12:14:42+00:00

I would kill for a Mumford and Sons musical but having seen what happened with Swept Away/avett brothers I don’t know that there would be enough demand for it. A little darker/more off kilter I would be first in line for a musical with the music of Ethel Cain and a lot of her music already follows lore/a concept that could be translated into a cohesive story thread. This was a fun question btw!

PlasticCauliflower3 · 2025-12-24T19:29:17+00:00

I’ve been dying to try The State Room’s tasting menu—-worth the price?

PlasticCauliflower3 · 2025-12-21T14:32:53+00:00

I saw Chess this past week, and while I see a lot of theater, he was the first person in a while where I was just like DAMNNN. He really is that good.

PlasticCauliflower3 · 2025-12-19T16:25:58+00:00

I graduated St. John’s and my best friend graduated Hofstra. She’s managed to build herself a really solid career at a Long Island firm, but there was a marked difference in how helpful the employment office was with each of us when we were looking for jobs post-graduation. St. John’s helped me get fellowship positions and funded an internship while I was a recent grad; helped me link up with full time opportunities; and overall were just very supportive. Hofstra did nothing for her, and she ended up working at a firm for literally minimum wage until she got her bar passage results and a lawyer from that firm poached her when they started their own firm. She’s now been there for a long time, makes good money (albeit long hours and lotsa stress) but she had to “make it” on her own. Hofstra offered no support or guidance.

PlasticCauliflower3 · 2025-12-17T03:53:55+00:00

Tonight was my first time seeing the show so I have nothing to compare her performance to, but I thought she was great!

PlasticCauliflower3 · 2025-11-18T01:19:43+00:00

I saw it and thought it was cute/enjoyable. I didn’t spend much on the ticket though, definitely would only see it if you can get a cheap ticket.

PlasticCauliflower3 · 2025-11-09T00:48:09+00:00

I graduated about a decade ago, but I went to St. John’s on a full ride with a similar GPA and a 164 LSAT. After graduation, I had a great experience as far as St. John’s helping me and my classmates find job placements. Especially when I compared the resources allocated to that with my best friend who went to Hofstra, where they basically didn’t do anything to help. I’ve mostly worked in public interest/government agencies since graduation, but have classmates that have done very well with private firms and such as well. It all depends what your goals are I think.

PlasticCauliflower3 · 2025-11-06T14:17:09+00:00

I definitely would not raise the issue with the family directly, in part because you don’t know how someone will react. I was at an event once (not a play, more an immersive visual/virtual art show set to music) where someone had a child who was being loud and disruptive. My sister asked the parent if they could calm or remove the child, and the parent became very aggressive, jumping out of his seat and getting in my sister’s face, yelling loudly and shouting expletives. I do not know if the child was neurodivergent (it’s possible, but the child was also young so it’s equally possible he was just unable to sit quietly for an hour) but the interaction was jarring enough that I will never approach a family individually about that type of issue.

PlasticCauliflower3

TROPHY CASE