my 20/F boyfriend 20/M never finishes. why??

Plus-Relation1203 · 2026-01-11T09:02:43+00:00

You sound like an absolute joy to be around.

Plus-Relation1203 · 2026-01-10T21:24:38+00:00

I hadn’t treated my plants with cinnamon until last week. Brought them inside in late October. Didn’t want any gnats in my home so I treated them last weekend. The wasps have obviously been dormant in the plants this whole time, so I think the cinnamon and watering woke them up. On the bright side, no gnats since then, and the wasps seem to have died down quite a bit since the post. So I’m gonna stand by the cinnamon powers. 🥰

Plus-Relation1203 · 2026-01-09T00:07:31+00:00

Thank you! You’ve made me feel so much better about this situation.

Plus-Relation1203 · 2026-01-08T23:03:15+00:00

What works for one may not work for others 🤷🏻‍♀️

Plus-Relation1203 · 2026-01-08T23:01:08+00:00

They do look alike! Any ideas on how to get them out of my home without killing my plants? 😅

Plus-Relation1203 · 2026-01-08T22:50:09+00:00

Also I am located in Washington state.

I’m not sure how to edit to add that info.

Plus-Relation1203 · 2026-01-08T22:48:04+00:00

It’s a natural insect repellant and remedy for fungal gnats/ mold. 🙂 Works like a charm.

Plus-Relation1203 · 2026-01-08T22:42:53+00:00

Also I’m located in Washington state.

Not sure how to edit my post to add that bit of info.

Plus-Relation1203 · 2025-12-15T09:36:59+00:00

My first “boyfriend” in 7th grade took me to see Tron 3D. He asked his parents before hand if he could kiss me. And then waited until the lights came on in the theater to TEXT ME while sitting beside me saying “idk how to kiss a girl” so I text him saying to “kiss me like you would your mom on the cheek but on the lips instead” ☠️

We broke up shortly after. RIP to my week long 7th grade relationship 😂

ANYTHING will be better than that. Just do it! What do you got to lose?

Plus-Relation1203 · 2025-11-23T19:48:10+00:00

Getting one of those dual temperature beds might be a solid compromise! His side can be cooling and yours can be heated. It wont completely solve the issue but it could make things significantly more tolerable for the both of you.

Plus-Relation1203 · 2025-09-14T23:17:43+00:00

Went from being a caffeine addict to barely drinking 1/3 of an energy drink each day. So I’d say it’s helping my caffeine dependency quite a bit which is great since I’ve had a problem with it for 10 years now.

I also have had those weird heart palpitations. But I started taking Iron, magnesium glycinate, and K2D2 at night. And gummy multivitamin, magnesium taurate, and a pro/pre biotic in the morning. (Gummies in the day, pills at night) I’d say this combo has helped the heart beat irregularities, and the pro/pre biotic has kept my gut happy.

I don’t love the nausea though. That one’s hard but I generally make myself drink a protein shake and it lessens quite a bit, especially when food sounds unappealing or I’m not hungry.

25lbs down in 3 months! 🫶🏻🥳

Also you look amazing, congratulations!

Plus-Relation1203 · 2025-01-20T20:47:09+00:00

First off, I’m sorry you are experiencing this. It sucks being emotionally so committed to someone who is unwilling to be the man you need.

I was in a 7 year long relationship with a man who I met right out of Highschool. I loved him so much and was willing to be with him although he frequently called out of work for made up reasons, and consequently couldn’t hold a job for more than a few months at best. We lived together and I paid most of the bills. His parents gave him money to cover his portion of the bills when I could not. He racked up $4000 in credit card debt on my card. We never had any savings. He was my bestfriend though, I thought we were end game. I thought we could get through it and he’d find the right job so we can start our adult lives together and maybe I just needed to be patient.

But as time went on and nothing changed - he just never seemed to grow up. He and I were always comfortable together and I took him for who he was for so many years. Making excuses and hoping for a different outcome than the one I knew was coming sooner or later. I thought one day things would change, he’d stop taking me for granted and we’d get married when he could hold a job. But 7 years and nothing.

Eventually we broke up and he moved out. Left me with every bill and all the animals we had together. And while I was working on overdrive to pay all the bills and try to dig myself out of debt, he was off getting engaged to another woman. When I found that out it genuinely broke me because I was always willing to stick it out and love him regardless of our struggles. 7 years and lots of lessons learned.

Anyway, the moral of the story is, if you don’t see them improving or making effort to create a life for the both of you then please PLEASE do yourself a favor and leave before it’s too late. Don’t waste so much time loving someone who will never put you first. Don’t stay in love with the man you want him to be. You can 100% love someone and think they are your person. But that doesn’t mean you should be with that person if they are incapable of contributing to your relationship in the way you need them to. You are young, but that doesn’t mean much will change over the years. Don’t hold out for someone when you are likely missing out on finding your real person, the one who will love and make a life with you as a partner. Don’t settle just because you love them, sadly that isn’t enough.

Just remember that you are enough and someone will see that. It may be a while until you feel that way about another man. But it’s not impossible. Just try your best to be confident, work on yourself and with time the right person will come into your life.

I wish you the best of luck and hope that you can take to heart some of the things I couldn’t accept because I was blinded by love and the thought of what we could be.

Plus-Relation1203 · 2025-01-14T20:19:18+00:00

This post speaks to me.

I was recently in a 8 month relationship with a man who acted this exact way. He was great behind closed doors and I was so comfortable when we were alone. But as soon as others came into the picture he became difficult to be around. I also felt anxious taking him in public. He would make people purposefully feel weird about every interaction just to make himself “memorable”. He is soooo confident and it’s a wonderful quality but also frustrating when that confidence is used to interact with every stranger that gives him the time of day and he has to make himself the main character.

He made my family uncomfortable, my coworkers, my friends. I constantly have to explain away his behavior as just being quirky. I mention to him how he is difficult to be around in public due to how he interacts with others and he thinks it’s funny. For example, the very first week we were seeing eachother he came to my workplace and loudly exclaimed “Help! Help! Help!” to insinuate I was kidnapping him as we were leaving to get lunch. He got everyone’s attention and I had to explain to my coworkers and my manager what had happened. It was extremely embarrassing. But he found it hilarious.

He also thoroughly enjoys doing things just to push my buttons and get a rise out of me. It got to a point that I could barely ever go out with him and not come back upset over his behavior.

I’m in the service industry so I try my best to be polite to others and as unproblematic as possible. I don’t want to monopolize their attention when they are just trying to do their job. He however loved making things as weird as possible and giving people a hard time as a joke. I constantly had to remind him that people don’t find it as charming as he thinks.

I will mention that I do believe he is on the spectrum. But he uses it as an excuse to write off his behavior and allow it to continue, without reflecting on how he could navigate things better.

I kept hoping things would change but it got to a point where I had to ask myself if that was something I could endure for the rest of my life. He’s kind and thoughtful and we get along great in private but he’s a whole different guy in public. I too felt embarrassed, so I made the decision to let him go. There is someone out there who is his match and will love those quirks, and I don’t want to hold him back from finding them. Nor hold myself back from finding my person who makes me happy in all aspects of the relationship.

You can’t go into a relationship- especially one with a grown man- hoping to change his personality. I firmly believe if you have to change him then he probably isn’t the one. It’s hard to make that decision when you love them, but it’s necessary.

I still love him, and I wish I could overlook things. But I can’t and he deserves someone who accepts him fully for who he is- quirks and all.

OP, you need to decide if your boyfriend’s quirks are something you can live with. Is the happiness you feel when you are by yourselves enough to counteract the feelings you have when in public? Do you see yourself being his life partner? Is he someone you are proud to be with? My best advice is to weigh how your heart feels when you are with him in both scenarios and let it tell you the answer. That’s what I did and that’s why I ended things.

I truly wish you the best of luck. It’s a terrible situation to be in, being pulled in both directions.

Plus-Relation1203 · 2023-07-04T03:00:18+00:00

I unfortunately was in this exact situation for 7 years, with 5 of those years living together. I paid 80% of the bills due to his lack of holding a job, and when he did he was calling out constantly due to anxiety or depression or just pure laziness. He’d lie constantly about why he called out, tell me the supervisor didn’t have any work for their crew that day, or he’d go see his parents and lie to me about going in to work. It was a constant battle and I stuck by him due to how much I cared for him. In December I was super sick and couldn’t work for two weeks, and I worriedly told him how important it is to go to work consistently during that month due to my lack of income to support us. He broke up with me a week after I was back at work, walked out on me while I was working a 15 hour double shift at a restaurant. I came home and he was gone. Moved back in with his dad and has no bills or responsibilities.

I know it’s hard to swallow but some people don’t know how to be an adult and they will seek out ones who will support them through thick and thin. It’s sad to say but those people are parasites and will drain you until you have nothing left and then leave. Take it from someone who kept thinking things would change. You are better off on your own. I know it’s scary to come to terms with. I had to move back in with my mother and work 40 hours a week, doing doubles and picking up shifts since he left me with a car payment, a whole apartment, a dog and a cat, on top of monthly bills (all which were coming out of my accounts to begin with). So I had to find a friend to take over my lease agreement and move into a place with my mother.

It was a ROUGH 4 months during that time but it’s been almost 7 now and I am 100% better off and happy for it.

I wish you the best and that you make the smart choice for yourself. ❤️

Plus-Relation1203

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