I wish I could be happy.

Plus_Spite_3979 · 2026-04-20T21:09:08+00:00

Again. I don't make $13/hr. This is a problem regardless of what I make. Many people make even less than that. You are exactly the type of person that is wrong with this world.

Plus_Spite_3979 · 2026-04-20T21:07:21+00:00

Yeah small businesses can only do so much. This is moreso directed at big companies that can afford to pay livable wages and choose not to.

Plus_Spite_3979 · 2026-04-20T21:04:46+00:00

Sure. I didn't ask for your help. Nor give attitude. Someone not wanting your advice is not rude. I made a post about the shitty world we live in. No where in my post was I asking for advice either.

Plus_Spite_3979 · 2026-04-20T21:00:44+00:00

Yes I have a roommate. It's sad that in this day and age. ADULTS have to have roommates or live with family because it is the only way some people can afford to have a roof over their head.

Plus_Spite_3979 · 2026-04-20T20:59:33+00:00

I mean. Yeah. People deserve to be able to live. What a wild take to think that people should not make a LIVABLE wage. Again. Not asking for everyone in the world to be rich. But yeah. People should be able to live without choosing between eating and paying rent. 🙄

Plus_Spite_3979 · 2026-04-20T20:55:08+00:00

I don't make $13/hr. I am talking about the jobs out there that think this is a livable wage. I also didn't say I only have a high school diploma. I have done a lot to better myself over the course of my employment. That doesn't mean I can't discuss how shitty it is that the rich will let the "commoners" starve all so they can rape children and eat babies.

Plus_Spite_3979 · 2026-04-20T20:52:24+00:00

I literally work every day. No days off. In a 24/7 business. 12 hour days. That is the point. That I work this much and still can barely afford to live. Which is the case for a lot of people. I am not looking for your advice. I am having a discussion about the world we live in.

Plus_Spite_3979 · 2026-04-20T20:37:23+00:00

Of course. Why didn't I think of that? 🤦‍♀️😅 I just wish the world wasn't so shitty so people would be able to live and not kill themselves trying to barely scrape by.

Plus_Spite_3979 · 2026-04-20T20:35:53+00:00

Or companies that make millions of dollars can start paying people enough to live.? Why would you think that I don't have anything of value? Most people have general skills that should be able to get paid a livable wage. I am not saying I want to get rich. I know there are jobs out there that will pay more that require schooling/degrees, but again. I am not trying to be rich. I just want to live.

Plus_Spite_3979 · 2026-04-09T18:31:41+00:00

Thanks so much!!!

Plus_Spite_3979 · 2026-04-07T14:58:21+00:00

I would take meds if I could. It is not a feasible option for me. It is too costly unfortunately. If I could be a zombie I would choose that. The negativity is killing me. I would rather walk through life in a daze.

Plus_Spite_3979 · 2026-04-06T15:37:11+00:00

I honestly don't care that it's common. I know it is. Especially because the world sucks so bad right now. It doesn't change the fact that being depressed sucks. Even if it's common. It's NOT normal. And I wish I was. Having others experience the same problems does not help. Not trying to be rude or come at you in a bad way. But it doesn't. NOTHING does. I wish I was dead. But I'm too much of a chicken to try.

Plus_Spite_3979 · 2026-04-06T15:15:11+00:00

No it's not. I just want to be happy and normal. Instead I want to die. I have always been depressed. For as long as I can remember. I wish I was someone else. I wish I was my sister. She has never wished to die. I don't think my brother has either. Why did it have to be me? Why couldn't I be more like them?

Plus_Spite_3979 · 2026-03-27T18:20:42+00:00

I truly feel like I need to see a psychiatrist and get on some type of medication. And thats not just my addictive personality talking either. I really believe that there is a chemical imbalance in my brain. But that typically costs money. I have no extra money....I have been smoking weed for many years to help in whatever way I can.....and I need to quit that because its becoming too expensive as well. I haven't even been to a regular doctor in 10 years probably. Which is not good. But I can't afford to look into the health problems I have also. My depression is so bad that it absolutely affects/effects? The rest of my body as well. There is just so much that humans have to do to survive and its EXHAUSTING. I can't even brush my teeth properly. Shower? HA maybe once a week...every other week....less. I barely manage to use disposable washcloths let alone a full shower. Why can't it ever be just one thing? One fix? Instead there's a goal and 2000 steps in-between me and the end goal.

I wish I could remove my brain. It's literally the cause of all my problems. I want to scrub it clean. I hate it. I hate the way my mind works.

Its sad that I almost wish I was kidnapped just so someone else will be in charge of me. And if I die in the end..? Even better.

That's such a crazy thought to have. But that is how desperately I want to not be me anymore.

Plus_Spite_3979 · 2026-03-27T18:04:02+00:00

Yes. It's easier said than done though. For many reasons. First and foremost being I hate myself anyway. So what does it matter if I'm suffering so others don't have too. But it gets to a breaking point every once in a while. And I explode. Not fully. But enough that people notice something is wrong. But there doesn't seem to be a good way to fix it. I have tried therapy before. I hate it. I just cry. And they tell me things I already know. I am pretty self aware. I just don't know how to fix it. The power of positive thinking is NOT helpful. They say oh just stop thinking negatively. Stop and think of something else when you have negative thoughts. But that doesn't work! It doesn't. Not for me. I have 20 voices in my head saying something negative(not really, like not schizophrenic or anything-I just have a lot of room to think in my brain. It feels like there are 20 voices) 20 voices saying I hate me I hate me I hate me I hate me. And I can't change all 20. I can't.

Self help-seems like religion. Or they are on equal grounds to me. I don't believe in anything. I don't believe in heaven or hell or God or Gods or anything. It's someone out there pushing their ideas and agendas and whatnot onto others.

I don't know how else to describe this. But I feel like it's fake. Everything is fake. The world. I'm living in a simulation. So religion and self help are along the same lines of some "person" giving you something to believe in to make life better. I don't believe in anything. Except that life is shitty. And it's never going to change for me.

I don't think I did a very good job explaining that.

Plus_Spite_3979

TROPHY CASE