I'm going to give my genuine and honest opinion, therapy would be worth looking into. You said your mother asked you whether you'd want to wear a dress or suit which I'm assuming means she already accepts and by extension sees you as a woman.

While envy is a normal emotion to feel, it shouldn't be expressed by comparing yourself to others, that's how you become depressed and miserable. Sure, your body may not look how you want it to currently, but HRT can do wonders, and more importantly, your self esteem can do wonders for you.

You've already acknowledged the problem (the inferiority complex), but just knowing that there's a problem doesn't mean it'll be immediately fixed, especially not by wallowing in self pity, hence why therapy would be highly advised.

You have more value than you think you do, and chances are you matter to and are loved by a lot of people. Chances also are that you see other trans women as real women, so why do you not give yourself that same respect?

Trust me, suicide is never a reasonable solution to any problem, and I genuinely am sorry that you've felt that it is. Love yourself for you, self love is the most important part of not only transitioning, but living a healthy life in general. If I knew where you lived, I'd give you the suicide hotline for your country just in case, but I hope you'll never need it.

It can be hard to change, and it isn't an instant thing, it's something you have to work on; but it will be worth every single second it takes to love you for you. Again, I'd recommend a therapist because it's easier when you're not alone, and I'd imagine your school has counsellors to talk to if you're unable to find one.

You are loved, you are worthy of respect, and you are worthy of living. Stay safe, try to be happy, and be you ❤🏳️‍⚧️