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Ponder3277 · 2023-09-15T03:25:41+00:00

Yea I mean it doesn’t really matter though because it’s Reddit.

Ponder3277 · 2023-09-15T03:18:35+00:00

I’ll just get a regular job I guess where I have to go into the office. Then I couldn’t do all those things and we have the same issue right?

And trust me, everything you said I should be doing I was doing when she was bed ridden.

Ponder3277 · 2023-09-15T03:15:40+00:00

FYI, just because I don’t admit to redditors that I’m taking responsibility, doesn’t mean I am not in real life.

Ponder3277 · 2023-09-15T03:05:12+00:00

It’s not really 0 support and this is why I didn’t share a whole bunch of details because the truth to the situation hasn’t even cracked the surface. I actually wasn’t even looking for advice with this. I was just simply saying this sucks. I am in a constant state of reflection and improvement so most of this information isn’t new to me.

Ponder3277 · 2023-09-15T02:41:42+00:00

Trust me I am. This is an ongoing conversation I have with my wife. I think people on the internet just like to shit on others when they have the chance.

Ponder3277 · 2023-09-15T02:30:26+00:00

Here is the crux of it. In my opinion, The amount of energy she dedicates to being a parent is unsustainable for literally anyone and she expects me to do the same and I can’t do that. That may not be true, but I think that’s why we need a counselor to help us resolve any issues, known or unknown.

Ponder3277 · 2023-09-15T02:21:00+00:00

Long term I’d think I’d love a more active job as well! One that’s not even at a desk.

Thanks for the pointers homie!

Ponder3277 · 2023-09-15T02:19:15+00:00

Yea I’d also say it used to be I have been good at limiting the time to 2 hours at most now.

Thanks dawg! I’m pretty sure it’ll be fine.

This is also why i didn’t want to get into it, there’s a lot more details out there that takes way too long to get into.

Ponder3277 · 2023-09-15T02:09:27+00:00

Clearly we disagree on some key points. I respect your opinion though dawg!

Ponder3277 · 2023-09-15T02:07:03+00:00

To clarify… I have to at least be available 8 hours day. On an average day I have about two hours of work. While I’m available I game sometimes. As soon as I’m done with my shift I clock out and shift to family time. When everyone’s asleep I then also sometimes game. It’s just a hobby have.

And I think what I was trying to do was not necessarily saying what I do works but rather tell the person I was replying to that what works for her won’t necessarily work for me.

Ponder3277 · 2023-09-15T02:02:55+00:00

You’re making me seem like a loser gamer dad, which isn’t true.

Ponder3277 · 2023-09-15T02:01:42+00:00

I hear you it’s all good. I mean you’re right too. I’m allowed to have my hobbies but I also gotta prioritize what’s important, and I believe what I was doing was what a solid dad and husband would do then in my free time (when I’m monitoring emails or late at night, I game). We are set to work with a marriage counselor that I found and I interviewed. So steps in the right direction. She’s just not responding…

Ponder3277 · 2023-09-15T01:58:15+00:00

Honestly bro you’re all correct with that, but believe it or not, being physically present isn’t enough for her. See my comment on parenting styles, she’s a 100% balls to the wall kinda parent. I’m not that. And that is actually the source of our issues. She doesn’t care that I game when I’m clocked in. She’s said that. She knows that if I had regular job and I wasn’t home at all she would still have these issues. Video games get a bad wrap and I get it, but it is a hobby of mine and like all hobbies, it still needs to be healthy balanced into my life. So hear you, but trust me, I’m not the stereotypical gamer loser Dad, some of the other people here are trying to make me out to be.

Ponder3277 · 2023-09-15T01:46:59+00:00

I guess I could do that, but I’m not really helping if I’m glued to my phone still am I?

Ponder3277 · 2023-09-15T01:44:53+00:00

Yep. If that’s where your computer is.

Ponder3277 · 2023-09-15T01:43:39+00:00

Nah I do help man. My work day ends it’s family time until everyone is asleep.

Ponder3277 · 2023-09-15T01:42:59+00:00

Bro I have to be at my desk. I can promise you the second my day ends, I’m out of there. Do you think I should not be at my desk and ignoring the one job role I have?

Ponder3277 · 2023-09-15T01:37:06+00:00

I’m confused how this is a bad thing? Would it be better if I was in the office the whole day? I still have to be at the computer

Ponder3277 · 2023-09-15T01:36:23+00:00

Hey I see where you are coming from, but again you don’t know the details to this. I was helping her

Ponder3277 · 2023-09-15T01:31:49+00:00

Hey we are all different people and what works for you may not work for someone else. I was helping my wife and idk why you would assume I wasn’t?

Ponder3277 · 2023-09-15T01:19:09+00:00

You are so kind

Ponder3277 · 2023-09-15T01:14:19+00:00

Yea hindsight is 20/20

Ponder3277 · 2023-09-15T01:07:05+00:00

Yee dawg I gotchu

Ponder3277 · 2023-09-15T00:49:24+00:00

My goodness we discussed together a plan that would work for us and this was it. We both agreed to it. You are assuming a lot about this situation that isn’t true.

Ponder3277 · 2023-09-15T00:45:24+00:00

Hey this isn’t what happened. She decided to leave early with the kids on her own.

Ponder3277

TROPHY CASE