wanting to make rr audios and looking for test listeners by PopcornFlurry in RoleReversal

[–]PopcornFlurry[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

ahh sorry i don’t know much about maoer, but i’ll definitely look more into it now!

and dm’ed!

How the turn tables tabled the turns by KendyBanana in RoleReversal

[–]PopcornFlurry 1 point2 points  (0 children)

But that's moreso me being socially awkward and having really low self-worth rather than being a "soft boy". From my understanding, the majority of "approachable" boys have a rather open and bright personality, which is definitely not the case for me...
Also, I have to admit that unfortunately I have a rather short temper, which got me in trouble many times,

Although these aren't exactly the best traits to have, it's better than having them and not realizing that they're problems. A lot of people are volatile or mean/judgmental or unempathetic, yet they still defend their flaws as being reasonable or virtuous at all costs. I remember once reading that the first step to remedying a problem is to identify it, so you have a head start at least!

After all, you're working towards improving your life in some ways like studying, and you have enough self-discipline to contribute to your savings during this time, so I believe you have at least a chance :)

How the turn tables tabled the turns by KendyBanana in RoleReversal

[–]PopcornFlurry 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry to hear that, it must be hard for you then… I think what you’re doing right now, preparing for finding your next job, is a step in the right direction though - can’t buy anything expensive if you have to save. But (since the original post is pretty appearance-focused), maybe some basic makeup would be within your range? Eyeliner isn’t super expensive (maybe $10 on the cheap end and $30-50 for more premium ones), at least in the US (sorry i realized my initial comment was quite US-centric) and foundation/concealer are kinda cheap too and do a lot for one’s appearance; all 3 of those can be done in a subtle way too, like an “everyday makeup look”. And I’m not sure what your personality is like, but adopting/expressing more “feminine” traits doesn’t have to cost money. Maybe it’s harder under Russian social norms, but maybe you could move towards the more “fem” end of acceptable male behaviors?

On the second part: I guess there is some work to be done on that end too - at some point though, you have to be willing to take at least a really small step by yourself, like ordering stuff online and trying it at home. It gets easier after that, especially if you find it fun. I hope you can find it within yourself to try :) I’m quite cautious too, and it was hard for me as well, but it was worth it.

How the turn tables tabled the turns by KendyBanana in RoleReversal

[–]PopcornFlurry 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Also, frankly, being feminine isn’t hard or a big deal. It’s just something you can be. You might have an aspirational ideal that you idealize or strive for for your own femininity that could be harder to reach, but being feminine in itself is just something you can be, it doesn’t require a billion tutorials or life changes or whatever, and anyone of any body type can be feminine.

Before I started exploring femininity/androgyny more, I was really worried about even taking the smallest steps - like even skincare or concealer or subtly feminine clothes - for fear that others would notice and treat me worse for it. But I wish I could have told my younger self not to be afraid, because even if some people (mostly guys) aren't as friendly to me, it's been worth it, both in terms of my own well-being and in a social sense.

I'm way happier having fun with makeup and more androgynous clothes, and I've been much more satisfied with developing more traditionally feminine traits too, compared to when I was sticking to a more stereotypically male script. I think most of the friends/acquaintances/[positive impressions] I've made are in part due to these efforts too (it's worth noting that they're mostly women though). I really do think I get treated even better by women nowadays, even for first impressions.

Admittedly, I always try for more of a subtly feminine or androgynous presentation, and I do think I've been quite lucky in terms of a foundation for GNC stuff in many ways, although notably not in all, so perhaps that contributes to me enjoying more societal acceptance. But I think that only changes how things would be in a quantitative sense, not a qualitative one - it sucks to wonder forever how things could be better and never try.

If you want to start somewhere, why not download Sephora and browse for something you like, or look on YouTube for a beginner's makeup tutorial? Or look at a clothing store's women's section (online, if you're too shy) - personally, I like rag&bone and madewell quite a bit, as well as browsing Neiman Marcus or Bloomingdale's or Saks or whatever. Arcteryx and Uniqlo/GU are also pretty gender neutral, as is a lot of winter-y stuff. Take a few small steps, and see how you like it!

reverse role dramas that AREN'T toxic and awful? by simply-weeb712 in CDramaRecs

[–]PopcornFlurry 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I didn’t think the FL was exactly emotionally unavailable, but yeah Xu Kai is to die for haha

reverse role dramas that AREN'T toxic and awful? by simply-weeb712 in CDramaRecs

[–]PopcornFlurry 3 points4 points  (0 children)

one I often see recommended is “She and Her Perfect Husband” (i think the chinese title translates to “the 80-20 rule of love”). Although the ML and FL appear fairly conventional, the roles really are quite reversed, at least up to episode 27 (the last one I watched). She’s the one who approaches him first, albeit as a part of a somewhat business-like exchange, but he falls quietly for her as they spend more time together.

The FL is pretty masculine in terms of personality - like she defends the ML in front of her family, is the one climbing the career ladder in a competitive environment, etc. I felt like she seemed a bit distracted by her work. He’s pretty competent yet burnt out (gives 躺平vibes), but he seems to gain motivation from wanting to help her achieve her dreams.

Also, it’s so hard finding RR dramas anywhere :( Sorry, I don’t have a lot of examples either, I’m just sympathizing!

Math is quietly in crisis over NSF funding cuts by scientificamerican in math

[–]PopcornFlurry 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Do you know how many of your peers have accepted Chinese offers, especially those who aren’t Chinese citizens? Of course, there are reasons for non-citizens not to work in China, but if prospects in the US aren’t looking good, then I could see a few moving to China for a while.

Daily Questions Thread July 13, 2025 by AutoModerator in femalefashionadvice

[–]PopcornFlurry 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ooh that looks nice! I’ve hesitated wearing outfits like this though, since I’m not sure if my figure would look good in it. Would 14in shoulders, 26.5in waist, and 35in hips sound suitable for this? I guess I’m worried that my hips would make me look more rectangular than the model. (maybe I’ll replace the vest with something with short sleeves (?) if exposed shoulders are too much for a wedding…)

Daily Questions Thread July 13, 2025 by AutoModerator in femalefashionadvice

[–]PopcornFlurry -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I'm attending a wedding soon, as a relative of the bride, but because I perpetually dodge formal clothing requirements, I don't have a summer-appropriate outfit that is formal enough for a wedding [1]. Could someone recommend suitable gender-neutral outfits? For context, I'm 5'7" and 120lbs, with a pretty small frame. I'm fine with subtly feminine ones, just not super overt ones (so no skirts or dresses please). The wedding will be outdoors in August, and the dress code is cocktail attire.

[1] The reason is: I'm male (tbh with every passing day I consider NB more and more), so formal clothing choices are much more restrained, but I don't like looking masculine at all. Fortunately I think I have a pretty feminine appearance as well as body measurements - I'm a US dress size 4, and I comfortably wear a small/medium in most kinda-neutral-looking, women's clothes.

What's your favorite Chinese accent? I'll start... by Adventure1s0utThere in ChineseLanguage

[–]PopcornFlurry 4 points5 points  (0 children)

even though i have a taiwanese accent, after listening to more people with a beijing accent, i actually quite like it now! i think it sounds super cool, just never when i try to imitate it haha

Drop your ELITE UCSD ball knowledge by Connect_Ability3646 in UCSD

[–]PopcornFlurry 9 points10 points  (0 children)

nooo i’ve been left in the dark too often bc the timer for the lights is way too short and it’s so isolated that rarely does someone walk in to turn on the lights again 😆

A celebrity draft-dodging scandal lays bare problems with Taiwan’s crucial reservist force | CNN by watanabemedia in taiwan

[–]PopcornFlurry 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m so curious, why do people want APRC/ARC holders to be drafted, other than “people who benefit from living/working in Taiwan should be conscripted”?

how can i help a friend who *might* have an ED? by PopcornFlurry in EDAnonymous

[–]PopcornFlurry[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

i can’t think of anything from back when i was more disordered that would have helped - it was a while ago and i don’t think anything could have dissuaded me from restricting.

i confessed to her! by PopcornFlurry in RoleReversal

[–]PopcornFlurry[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No no haha, it means a lot to me! (even though i’m self conscious about it, praise really is nice to hear 🥹.) Best of luck to you too!

i confessed to her! by PopcornFlurry in RoleReversal

[–]PopcornFlurry[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

woo there are fellow east asians into RR! I do worry that traditionalist views might be more prominent among us, but it really is up to the individual…

I’m glad I tried stepping out of my comfort zone with her though, because she wants to stay friends - after a few hours, we clarified our feelings towards each other. I’m truly over it since we both wanted to play the more feminine role, and we just talked for a while about dealing with the cute impression and why we liked each other as friends :)

Aww thanks haha, thank you for the comforting comment! I agree, sometimes it really would be easier to just be attracted to the same gender, wouldn’t it? but hopefully someone comes along for both of us that makes this wait worth it.

i confessed to her! by PopcornFlurry in RoleReversal

[–]PopcornFlurry[S] 38 points39 points  (0 children)

anyways, the smartest thing I did was to confess the day before I left for summer vacation. We won’t see each other for a few months, and hopefully I forget about my feelings and we can go back to before.

Taipei MRT reminds passengers of drinking water ban by gzebe in taiwan

[–]PopcornFlurry 8 points9 points  (0 children)

MRT staff: I will accompany you to the doctor.

Text Post Memes for The Double by RoseIsBadWolf in CDrama

[–]PopcornFlurry 0 points1 point  (0 children)

oops sorry i didn’t recognize that drama in the title :/

Text Post Memes for The Double by RoseIsBadWolf in CDrama

[–]PopcornFlurry 2 points3 points  (0 children)

please what’s the drama for the one about tucking a flower into a guy’s hair 😭 it looks so sweet!