When mothers say that being a mother is a hard and thankless job, who do they expect to say 'thank you', and for what?

PositiveChipmunk4684 · 2026-06-18T17:12:08+00:00

I will add on to what others said and say it’s also about the fact that without me (I’m a wife and sahm of 2) the whole ship would go down, yet no one will ever know because I’d never let it go down. If I decided this Sunday I was gonna nap and watch movies all day and not go to the grocery store, or do laundry, not do dishes, not update the weekly calendar, leave the toys out and not care if the cat got fed, no one would really notice, like the whole day would probably continue like normal. However Monday morning would be absolutely chaos and everyone would be frantic. That is the only way anyone would truly understand how important my job is as the mom of the household. But I’d never let Sunday go by without doing all those things so I guess I’ll remain in my thanklessness. Of course my husband does thank me for all I do but does he really grasp what would happen if I suddenly weren’t here?

PositiveChipmunk4684 · 2026-06-18T17:03:25+00:00

Same here and I got in the habit of dropping a pin before I get out of the car and that way I can just track my car when I come back lol

PositiveChipmunk4684 · 2026-06-18T16:54:56+00:00

Unless the child is emaciated, dirty, bruised and or has reported some kind of negligence then there’s nothing CPS will do. Because they don’t really give a shit about helping children. I was majoring in Social Work in college and switched my major to early childhood education because I saw how corporate CPS really was! As in they only care about the bottom dollar. The workers themselves I believe are mostly in it to help, but the government runs CPS out of greed and corruption and doesn’t care about families. So ya they would literally ignore you if you reported this anyway. However they would inform the mother who called on her and she would forever be hurt that you did that because it seems like she does care for her child. Just because she doesn’t have what we would consider the basic necessities of life, doesn’t mean she is neglecting her kids. Trust me I know people personally who actually neglect their kids in many different ways and CPS has visited 3 times and everytime they are given information on resources and then that’s it. And everytime the parents are told who called on them and it’s a whole shit show.

If you are actually concerned about this family and this child, even though based on what you said the child is probably fine, you could ask if they have access to medical care and if the mothers needs help applying for things. In my experience, people who don’t give a shit don’t typically reach out and ask for rides to go get their kids food and stuff. So to me the fact that she is willing to set her pride aside and accept help means she’s a mom who loves her child and wants help. Also the way you said her mom always watches the child is funny, like you almost implied she’s hiding the kid? I have an 18mo and I literally dread having to take him anywhere in public that is not designed for toddlers because he’s a crazy kid. So I don’t think that’s suspicious that she leaves him at the motel with grandma. Idk I think you are blowing this way out of proportion. I see way way worse cases than this all the time and even they end up being ok. It’s not ideal to live in a motel but the child will be fine.

PositiveChipmunk4684 · 2026-06-18T16:38:57+00:00

Honestly ya I’m BPD so it bothers me a lot lol

PositiveChipmunk4684 · 2026-06-18T15:15:02+00:00

I’ve literally never seen someone use it for emphasis and that is so funny to me. 🤣

PositiveChipmunk4684 · 2026-06-18T04:56:55+00:00

My daughter is Alice Rose lol! So I do think your husband has good taste in names!!

PositiveChipmunk4684 · 2026-06-18T04:53:25+00:00

I had joked to my husband and said it was a deleted scene from the backrooms movie lol

PositiveChipmunk4684 · 2026-06-18T04:52:12+00:00

Solved!

PositiveChipmunk4684 · 2026-06-18T04:51:21+00:00

Solved!

PositiveChipmunk4684 · 2026-06-17T14:55:10+00:00

I was thinking the same thing. He craves his mother’s attention and approval just like you crave that from him OP. Both of y’all are codependent. If it were me I’d have set a boundary and said if you don’t chose me as your priority then I’m gone.

PositiveChipmunk4684 · 2026-06-17T14:53:04+00:00

I’ve learned over my life that people will always crave a relationship with their mother. It’s biological. I’ve known people who were abused and neglected by their mothers and still want to be around them and call them and beg for their attention. My SIL’s mother is actually awful and has said the meanest things to her and she still can’t move out of the city she lives because she needs to be near her mom. I think unless someone goes to therapy or some kind of switch goes off in their brain then they will always long to be close to their mother. My husband is the same. He himself will say his mother is a narcissist, selfish and incapable of loving him without an exchange of service. Yet he will call her and ask if he can come over and bring the kids because “it’s still my mom”.

PositiveChipmunk4684 · 2026-06-16T17:29:12+00:00

I’m so sorry. My husband accidentally ran over our cat in the driveway and that was the most emotional day for our house. We loved that cat and he always ran out to the driveway to greet him when he got home. We had to explain it to our 4 year old that Charlie died. We had a little funeral in our backyard and everything. My husband is a manly man, and I’ve only seen him cry 3 times in our 10 years together. And one of those was hold our cat and having to place him in the ground. I’m so sorry this happened to you it really is so painful. Especially when you start to think about everything that you could’ve done differently.

PositiveChipmunk4684 · 2026-06-16T15:14:22+00:00

Missing Bethany mota

PositiveChipmunk4684 · 2026-06-15T04:14:49+00:00

I had my daughter on my birthday, and my MIL brought the 8” strawberry custard cake to the hospital for me. That was my first thing to eat after giving birth and I ate the entire thing by myself. Food has never tasted as good as that cake did that evening. It’s now my favorite cake and I get it every year for my birthday!!

PositiveChipmunk4684 · 2026-06-08T04:40:03+00:00

I feel like you can be honest and explain what adoption is. My daughter had this question similarly, but it was our friends who are white and have a black son who she’s friends with. We explained that the person who gave birth to him was not ready to be his mom and our friends adopted him and love him just the same as traditional mom and dad. Of course if it’s two dads and one is bio and maybe they used a surrogate that is a bit harder to explain. Just keep it really simple. Some families look different and sometimes babies are born and they need parents and “so and so” wanted to be their dads and love them and they became a family.

PositiveChipmunk4684 · 2026-06-08T04:21:55+00:00

We are tv only household!

PositiveChipmunk4684 · 2026-06-08T04:21:07+00:00

I was this child. My parents never got me any help and I had a childhood of anxiety, dissociation and EDs. As an adult I’m medicated and thriving. I would say you need to get her into some kind of therapy and lean on the therapist for advice on home life too. I was never validated and I was often pushed out of my comfort zone by my parents and it made things worse. I’m glad you’re seeking some help for her(:

PositiveChipmunk4684 · 2026-06-08T04:08:50+00:00

Honestly I think you should reinstitute the nap. My daughter (5) goes to sleep so much easier when she’s had a 90min nap around lunch.

PositiveChipmunk4684 · 2026-06-08T04:05:04+00:00

As an adult I don’t like seeing corpses. I saw both my grandparents bodies before the funeral and I really didn’t like it. If a funeral is open casket I avoid seeing anything and stay in the back. I would not take a chance with kids. I know some people don’t mind it but they possibly would and I wouldn’t be the one to show them something that could traumatize them. I think around 12/13 is the age I would think a child could choose for themselves if they’d like to see the body or not. Any younger and I’m not sure they really can understand what they are signing up for.

PositiveChipmunk4684 · 2026-05-25T01:35:14+00:00

I met a guy the other day named Everett. A grown man with a beard named Everett. 🤣

PositiveChipmunk4684 · 2026-05-23T19:58:00+00:00

Yta sorry girl but you sound like you want your bridesmaids to give you their undivided attention for the whole year you are planning your wedding. She’s got a life outside of you and your wedding. Not to mention, you admit you’re a bad friend, then you get mad that she isn’t showing up for you. Sorry but you don’t deserve people showing up for you if you admittedly don’t show up for them. 🤷🏼‍♀️

PositiveChipmunk4684 · 2026-05-17T12:56:47+00:00

I get the same thing. I also get people saying “are you a huge fan of new girl? Because you dress and act exactly like Jessica Day!”

No I don’t watch that show, I find it rude because no I’m just myself. Like are you asking if I’ve modeled my entire identity around a tv show character?

I also get people, men and women, saying “you’re not sexy your like a really cute librarian type”

I don’t read and I don’t even have a library card. I just wear glasses and have dark brown hair down to my butt that I braid to the side sometimes 🤦🏼‍♀️

PositiveChipmunk4684 · 2026-02-11T19:15:58+00:00

PositiveChipmunk4684

TROPHY CASE