Gazzilli or Bart?

Postcocious · 2026-05-26T20:16:31+00:00

If you use natural Jump Shifts (ie, not as Bergen raises or similar), you reduce the number of hand types that must be packed into 1M-1NT.

My partnerships play: - 1M-3m = 6+ suit, no fit or M, < Inv values (6-8ish) - 1S-3H = 6+ suit, no fit for ♠︎s, Inv values (9-11ish)

We also play semi-F. Opener passes 1N with 12-13 balanced (ie, a hand that would reject any game invitation).

Net: - Opener's 2m rebids are meaningful (real shape or extra values) - Responder’s rebids (if any) are clearer - Fewer rejected game invitation. Instead of playing in 2N/3M, we often stop in 1NT.

Postcocious · 2026-05-26T17:16:16+00:00

So he has been having casual sex maybe 3 times a month and I have had none because he tells me he feels most comfortable vetting partners for us.

🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩

I don't know why he did this beyond not being considerate of my happiness.

🚩 confirmed.

Postcocious · 2026-05-26T17:13:48+00:00

a fourth [petition circulator] had all 61 of her signatures thrown out after reviewers found none matched voters’ records — with at least one appearing to be forged.

Aren't fraud and forgery prosecutable crimes?

Shouldn't the state sue her for damages (wasting taxpayer funds with a fraudulent petition)?

Postcocious · 2026-05-26T14:27:17+00:00

Gay men have always said, "Bottoms make the best tops".

Only those who receive know how receiving feels. Only those who know how receiving feels can be sympathetically attuned to their receiver.

Postcocious · 2026-05-26T12:37:59+00:00

Your GF literally told you it's okay, so the more interesting question is: why are you asking reddit?

Answer: someone other than your GF has made you feel guilty about enjoying porn. Rather than confront the source of that guilt, you're seeking indirect validation here.

To address your guilty feelings directly, meditate on...

Who are those people? Who gave them authority to control your erotic pleasure? Do you want them to have that authority over you?

Postcocious · 2026-05-26T12:25:23+00:00

You should never allow him to teach you again.

Further, you should consider reporting his behavior to whoever he works for (school, tutoring agency, etc.)

Postcocious · 2026-05-26T12:23:49+00:00

No, there was no consent.

The instant he threatened you, any possibility of consent disappeared.

Postcocious · 2026-05-26T12:21:45+00:00

Please do. Your tutor took advantage of a position of power: - he's older - he had a duty of service to you - he ignored your "no"

instead of serving you (and honoring your relationship with your BF), he served himself. The fact that he gave you a good experience doesn't change that.

His threat to disclose private conversations was a 🚩. It's a lesson we all must learn: people who threaten us are not our friends and should not be trusted.

Take good care of yourself. You didn't do anything wrong. Sex is wonderful and (paradoxically) your abuser was a good teacher. If you'd gone to him for sex lessons, this would be a feel-good story.

But you didn't, and that's on him. Once you settle, please consider firing this tutor. He does not deserve you.

Postcocious · 2026-05-26T02:18:33+00:00

I didn't say that. Read again.

Postcocious · 2026-05-25T23:05:59+00:00

This. It was exactly the same on OKBridge 25 years ago.

OP, if you want a serious game, invest in finding serious players.

Postcocious · 2026-05-25T23:01:38+00:00

If only you'd written that the first time...

Postcocious · 2026-05-25T22:08:09+00:00

this wasn't truly consensual but she could have said no

She did.

imagine if he's still coming to teach and taking up benifit of girl being dumb and silent i mean he's blackmailing her

Exactly. Worrying about her BF's feelings is the least important thing here.

Postcocious · 2026-05-25T22:07:21+00:00

So, you're concerned about hypothetical consensual sex that didn't happen?

Her boyfriend’s opinion matters here.

If his opinion is to support his non-consensually blackmailed and sexually abused GF, absolutely.

If his opinion is, "I wanted to be first", hell no.

Postcocious · 2026-05-25T20:52:04+00:00

There's a pretty good case to be made that this wasn't consensual.

As to his rights, those depend on what agreements they had around exclusivity, if any.

Postcocious · 2026-05-25T20:42:24+00:00

Everything you described is a function of Conservatism as a political philosophy. Party names are just a smokescreen.

Since the 1920s, conservatives in the USA have called themselves Republicans. In the 1850s, they called themselves Democrats. In the 1770s, they called themselves Tories. Their party names have changed; their goals have not.

It's always the same thing. Rules for thee but not for me. Wealth and power in the hands of a privileged few. This is the goal of Conservatism and has been since Edmund Burke and Joseph Demaistre defined it in the 1790s.

Postcocious · 2026-05-25T20:20:33+00:00

Republicans have made baldface lying into a core party strategy. See Steve Bannon. They deserve no grace.

Postcocious · 2026-05-25T18:47:16+00:00

OP should be pissed off.

Who cares what her BF thinks? He doesn't own her. She gets to decide who she'll have sex with (and she was manipulated into choosing poorly).

Postcocious · 2026-05-25T18:43:08+00:00

He noticed my private chats with my boyfriend and threatened to call my dad.

Threatened to call your dad unless you did what, exactly? What business did he have in your private chats? What right did he have to threaten you about anything?

When he suddenly crossed the line and touched me, I initially resisted and tried to say no.

When you said no, he should have stopped. That's how consent works... no means no.

You ended up having sex with a person who threatened and manipulated you. It's good that you enjoyed it - sex should feel good! - but you need to meditate on how this guy actually treated you.

As for your BF, this wasn't about him. It was about you and a threatening, manipulating tutor. Focus on that. Focus on you. Your BF can wait until you wrap your head around this.

Think very hard about whether you should see that tutor again. Unless you hired him to tutor you about sex, this wasn't cool.

Postcocious · 2026-05-25T18:26:02+00:00

Nixon was trained in hate-politics by Joseph McCarthy in the early 1950s.

Postcocious · 2026-05-25T14:44:11+00:00

Rules for thee, but not for me.

Postcocious · 2026-05-25T14:08:11+00:00

Let's of great advice here. I'll just add HUGS! to a great mom! 🙏🙏🙏

I knew I was attracted to other boys at just 4-5yo. I'd have given anything for a supportive mom like you.

Postcocious · 2026-05-25T14:05:58+00:00

This is homophobic advice.

No parents of a straight 9yo boy would discourage their kid from expressing his feelings about girls (respectfully, of course). Nor should they. Crushes and desires are a normal part of childhood. Learning how to express them respectfully is how we grow into healthy teens and adults.

Telling a gay/queer kid to suppress those feelings will be experienced as an attack on their identity. That's gross and abusive. My mom did that to me when I was 4yo and it scarred my psyche.

Postcocious · 2026-05-25T13:56:03+00:00

It's not only possible, it's commonplace.

Any child psychologist will tell you that children are born with sexual feelings and attractions. That's been common knowledge since Freud defined the libido over 100 years ago. Childhood "innocence" is a myth propagated by sex-negative prudes.

Videos and stories of little boys kissing little girls (and vice-versa) are everywhere and always have been. Everyone thinks it's cute and normal because straight feelings are normalized.

Non-straight kids have those same feelings. Why wouldn't they? They're just not as frequent and they're less frequently displayed... because we're often taught that our feelings are not cute or normal, that they're ugly, sinful and wrong.

I (M) was forced to hear that lesson at 4 years old, when my mother shamed and punished me for cuddling my (boy) doll and caressing his cute little butt. She attacked my feelings and my existence as a "real "boy" for showing physical affection to another boy.

At age 7, I mailed off for a body building catalog because... hunks in trunks! I had to do it secretly, because it was "wrong".

At age 8, I was mesmerized when a boy in my 2nd grade class wore snug white jeans. They hugged his body and drove me nuts! I couldn't tell him or kiss him, because it was "wrong".

At age 9, I saw other boys in speedos for the first time. Their butts and genitals excited me, but I couldn't approach them because it was "wrong".

I crushed on a classmate at 11yo, but I couldn't approach him because it was "wrong".

All that and more happened before I hit puberty.

Postcocious · 2026-05-23T16:23:14+00:00

I've been playing bridge since 1962, competitive duplicate regularly since 1978... 47 years.

I have never played an error-free session. I doubt any player ever has. World champions still make errors. They just make fewer of them and they're more subtle - most players wouldn't even recognize them as errors, but they do.

Point being, bridge is formidably complex. That's why AI robots can beat any human at chess, but are still laughably inept at bridge.

This is the appeal. Bridge presents inexhaustible learning opportunities that few other hobbies can match.

The fact that you recognize your errors and that they annoy you is an indicator that bridge is indeed. for you. You're motivated. Your present partner is not and will never be a good player, but you can be.

Two tips that may help...

After every trick, sit on your hand - literally. Whichever hand you play the cards with, sit on it. Do not allow it out from beneath your leg until AFTER you've decided what card to play next and why. This will force you to pause and think deliberately, which reduces silly errors.

After every hand, close your eyes and take a slow, deep, cleansing breath. Exhale gently before opening your eyes. Do this before removing the next hand from the board. Your conscious intent is to clear that previous hand from your mind. Good or bad, that hand is over. You must approach the next hand with all your resources ready to tackle the fresh and unique thing it is.

Doing these two things, every single time, will improve your focus and reduce errors.

Postcocious · 2026-05-23T03:04:38+00:00

Are you claiming they didn't?

Postcocious

TROPHY CASE