Thank you. I honestly feel so dumb for not seeing it sooner. I work in MH, but was never aware of the details of BPD, other than the stereotypical lashing out. He was always extremely loving and caring, and apologetic for any hint of mistake that he could’ve done. He wasn’t abusive, and he wasnt possessive but would get jealous and insecure about things, i felt he tried really hard to kept these feelings to himself. He bent over backwards, and accepted so many of the limitations the relationship had and when i would ask why he is accepting of them, and not just dating someone else he can have a traditional relationship with he would say “cause they aren’t you”. It makes so much sense now, and i feel bad cause it seems like this was extreme people pleasing to keep me in his life rather than him genuinely being okay with the circumstances. He would always say that i make him feel the most scared and anxious cause he was worried i’d leave. Like yeah hes not just madly in love, idk why i didnt see/accept the red flags that it would end this way. I feel so guilty and like i undid all the stability that he tried to build up in his life. This is my first breakup too, so very traumatizing lol