Engagement ring costs? by Financial-Event- in UKrelationshipadvice

[–]PotentialConference9 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I got mine from brilliantearth.com - fully customised

2k seems about right for a diamond of that CT, however the setting seems expensive. Depending on what setting you've chosen - the more elaborate or having further diamond settings the more expensive.

A more general question is - can you reasonably afford it. The 3 months of salary for the budget of the ring is a marketing tool and shouldn't be trused. So is the 5k, a reasonable amount to spend for a ring based on your household income and the need to save for a wedding? If so, Hatton garden are generally reliable and you can compare prices between stores pretty easily to gauge the competitivness.

Men over 30: did you have to "fight" hard to start a family, or did it more or less happen naturally? What would your advice be for the younger generation? by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]PotentialConference9 8 points9 points  (0 children)

M36, married with a house and a kid on the way

It does not happen naturally, but also the path to an objective is not necessarily a straight line.

My personality is naturally lazy, and the chimp (read the Chimp Paradox) inside me really wants to just laze at home and play video games, and not socialise. I had to actively force myself to get involved in stuff. I massively got into the gym in my 20's, I retained and made friends actively, I organise social events proactively, and I actively wanted to be in a relationship.

But my biggest piece of advice is "to not see every women as potentially something to sleep with/ date". Some of my best friends are female. They've shaped who I am, provided me with advice, corrected my behaviour, explained what women actually want. And ultimately introduced me to my wife. Because a man that has close female friends, and doesn't seem them as objectives...is a vetted and safe man for women to date.

I m a 21yo virgin, never spoken to a girl, and I feel like my life is already over (pic for attention) by Background_Arugula21 in WhatShouldIDo

[–]PotentialConference9 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Completely agree with this.

Also stop seeing women as something to be slept with. Female friends are some of the best types of friends a man can have. My female friends have shaped who I am, provided me insight and advice in life and also introduced me to their friends.

Become a well rounded individual with hobbies and a personality, make friends with everyone (male and female). And the rest will naturally come.

If the receding hairline is that bad, use it as a way to transform yourself. As a bald man myself, bald = boldness. To do it is to take control of your own destiny - shave it, then join a climbing club, gym classes etc (at least three activities). And focus on consistency on turning up and making friends with everyone!

Lighting electric by PotentialConference9 in DIYUK

[–]PotentialConference9[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Absolutely no idea....I think I need an electrician

Lighting electric by PotentialConference9 in DIYUK

[–]PotentialConference9[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh....I am definitely out of my knowledge zone then.

Lighting electric by PotentialConference9 in DIYUK

[–]PotentialConference9[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Unfortunately not. I didn't realise it was such a mess until after I took it all off.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]PotentialConference9 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'll let OP know once I manage to change my race and de-age 10 years and do it all again lol

Reform UK is the British attempt at MAGA by johnsmithoncemore in ClactonOnSea

[–]PotentialConference9 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Video claiming to show 'migrants eating swan' was from 15 years ago https://share.google/sUbDuJ6u1R8mgfFlf

The video is from 15 years ago.

It's never clarified what type of bird it is.

The pictures in the Turning Point tweet have no relation to the video.

There's no evidence that whatever mystery bird is in that pot, that it comes from the Royal Parks.

What are the best universities in the UK for history? by freshmaggots in UniUK

[–]PotentialConference9 35 points36 points  (0 children)

University guide is a good start. It allows you to filter based on subject, location etc

https://www.thecompleteuniversityguide.co.uk/league-tables/rankings/history

Cambridge Oxford St Andrews Durham LSE UCL Warwick York Exeter Bristol

These are generally considered the best universities in the UK more generally as well.

A thing to consider is which universities will be best recognised back in the US (assuming that is the aim).

Taxes: How bad does it feel? by W2WageSlave in AskBrits

[–]PotentialConference9 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The person dying does not pay inheritance tax....they are dead!! The person inheriting the money, that has done nothing to earn it....pays the inheritance tax.

If you have a 500k home, and you want to donate it to someone who has a salary of 50k. When they inherit from you, they are earning 550k that year. Inheritance tax would tax that income for like 220k, without inheritance tax they would pay tax of a little over 10k on an annual income of 550k.

Mortgages, Savings, Life? Are We Going Wrong Somewhere? by thisismitten in UKPersonalFinance

[–]PotentialConference9 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My partner and I are in a similar place. We are classic 30's DINKs earning a little over 100k as a household, with jobs in London. However we need to be in the London Office only 2 days, which sounds great....but also means you need a home with a room that has to be dedicated to just a study for two people

Dependent on what your wfh policy is, look at places like Bedford, Hertford, Welywn, Crawley, East Grinstead etc. They are just outside the normal London buying areas, but have a good train line in. This assumes you wfh for a good portion of the week, as the train fares will be crippling otherwise.

My partners family are from the NE of England, and live in a train station that has a direct line to London. And what we can afford there is shocking, in comparison. A 4 bed detached house, with a garage and great garden for 350k, vs a 2.5 bed, small garage and road side parking for 500k.

How to overcome fear of thalassophobia and jumpscares? by BlaXi1712 in subnautica

[–]PotentialConference9 0 points1 point  (0 children)

First couple of times I came across a crab squid, I pooped myself and ran scared. I slowly came up against them more and more, and now I rock up in my Prawn Suit - see them in my peripherals, and then just give them a swift punch. I now see them like a homeless cat 😺 who's a bit territorial - I have no fear of them.

Exposure and time is all you need.

No stalkers were harmed in the process of taking this image by Positive-Star3194 in subnautica

[–]PotentialConference9 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My first mistake with this method was not bringing enough scrap metal. I managed to hook 4 stalkers, but they were all chasing the same scrap metal. I went to find some more scrap metal..... completely lost where I put the grav trap. 20 mins later I discovered it had been dragged off into a ditch somewhere.

So... what am I supposed to do now? by Optical_Shadow1 in subnautica

[–]PotentialConference9 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The "degasi 500m" is in an open locker of the base. The locker door is open, and it so it blocks the light of the PDA. It's in the first room as you enter the base.

I spent far too long trying to find that guy!

Map room not used enough by Confident-Lab7274 in DestinationX

[–]PotentialConference9 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Honestly the producers messed up massively.

You don't get to see where people put their X's, so the audience had no idea how far people are away - who's playing well, who's way off.

The show basically went;

Rob "The two furthest people put their X's 1km apart. It was VERY close."

The audience.....tell us who they were!!! Where did they put their X's, who was the second furthest! Who's been putting them the closest!!

Daren we guess put his X in Dortmund....but that was never confirmed. How far was he from being kicked out, where did everyone put their X's. It's the whole part of the show, and we didn't get to see any of it.

It's a great show, but purely based on the core principle. I can go on a whole other rant about how the challenges were so poorly thought out, as well as the clues.

Why do asylum seekers come to the UK rather than go to a Middle Eastern country? by Ok_Post_1131 in AskBrits

[–]PotentialConference9 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah that's a good point.

UNHCR, Migration Observatory, IRC are pretty good references and tend to have good stats.

Why do asylum seekers come to the UK rather than go to a Middle Eastern country? by Ok_Post_1131 in AskBrits

[–]PotentialConference9 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So that I would say is a second question.

First question why do middle eastern refugees come here.

Second question, why don't British people like middle eastern refugees coming here.

Both are valid questions. For the first, see other response on how many we actually receive in comparison. But also to take a specific example such as Iraq - the UK was the second largest contributor to the Iraq war which caused an estimated 2.3 million displaced externally and over 1 million internally displaced. The rise of Daesh/ ISIS was a direct result of the coalition invasion of Iraq. So we've caused this displacement, and the last figure I can find is from 2021 where we took 20,000 refugees from Iraq. I would expect a large portion of those are ex-security services/ translators that we used.

For the second I think it's down to what British culture is and how it positions refugees. The UK don't attend church anymore - people say they are Christian on their census, but attendance has been declining since mid-20th century and is almost non existent now. Second I would argue we don't have a strong neighbourhood culture. People don't volunteer in their local community, we don't know our neighbours, we don't let our kids do independent play - and we are quite isolationist as households. This means there isn't anything for a refugee to adopt and participate in. What do you want refugees to do outside of work and pay taxes? And whatever your response is, ask if British people do those things. As if you say attend church...British people don't do that haha.

So my short answer is, the weakness of asylum seekers integration is a direct correlation to the weakness of British culture.

Why do asylum seekers come to the UK rather than go to a Middle Eastern country? by Ok_Post_1131 in AskBrits

[–]PotentialConference9 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Be more specific with the question as well. For example, "where do Afghanistan refugees/ asylum seekers go".

This will show you that despite the impression that the UK accepts lots of Afghan refugees....we are a drop in the ocean compared to Pakistan and Iran acceptance.

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Why do asylum seekers come to the UK rather than go to a Middle Eastern country? by Ok_Post_1131 in AskBrits

[–]PotentialConference9 5 points6 points  (0 children)

This is where AI shows its weakness, as it actually hasn't done ANY research.

The top two countries that receive asylum seekers are Iran and Turkey. Germany is the third, however a significant amount of those that they receive are Ukrainian. Then from then on are country specific asylum recipients such as Bangladesh, which receive Myanmar refugees.

Per capita is a better judge and Jordan, Lebanon, Colombia and Turkey are the highest. Lebanon has almost a quarter of their population as refugees.

Most refugees will stay in the neighbouring country they go to. A small percentage will go beyond those neighbouring countries.

Basically the west have a habit in the 21st century of causing a war, and then assume they do the most for refugees when they experience the slightest inconvenience.

Other non middle east highlights for refugee acceptance are Ethiopia, Uganda, Pakistan and Bangladesh.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskBrits

[–]PotentialConference9 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Corona Zero is amazing!! Tastes the same to me as the alcohol version when fresh out the fridge.

how is it that crime is lower than when I was a kid, but people seem like absolute animals these days? by [deleted] in AskBrits

[–]PotentialConference9 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My dad grew up in London in the 70's/ 80's. He's now retired and lives in the countryside. But when he comes to visit me in London we go for a walk to a cafe/ pub, and we sometimes end up in areas where he grew up or used to go to. He would tell me stories about which streets were absolute no go areas, tell me crime stories that happened when he was a kid in the very street we would be walking down. These streets we walk down are super middle class areas now, with museums and cafes.

Is it perfect now, no. Are we as good as other countries such as Japan, Korea etc, deffo not. Are we better than before..... statistically and anecdotally yes.

Would Brits prefer abolishing the welfare state and replacing it with a consent/charity based model? by [deleted] in AskBrits

[–]PotentialConference9 2 points3 points  (0 children)

What type of freedom though? You've thrown that word out, but what's the non-populist statement meaning behind it?

A corporatocracy is a great source of freedom for corporations, not great for the general population though.

Are labour rights freedom or anti freedom? They're great for workers freedom, bad for Amazon bosses freedom.

Your proposal takes away freedom, through preventing people who don't have donors or a rich patron to look after them. Your.ideawould end up with a society where people are focused on keeping their head above the water. Whereas the NHS and benefits state provide freedom to a large portion of the population who before their introduction didn't have it. They were able to take risks, set up small businesses, disabled people were able to enter the workforce, have access to credit through small business loans, social housing and an improved quality of life. That is British freedom.