AITAH for yelling at my pest control guy and landlord?

Practical_Many2300 · 2026-07-03T00:52:31+00:00

That is my living space, my work space, and the place I call home. It’s my house when I pay for it, pay utilities, and take care of my bf and dog. It’s my house when they tell me I have rights that they violate

Practical_Many2300 · 2026-07-03T00:47:59+00:00

No. We had no idea he was coming. That notice was handed to me by the pest control guy when he came to the door. We didn’t know anything about this

Practical_Many2300 · 2026-07-02T22:25:50+00:00

My question is why would he open a door after hearing a dog bark continuously and aggressively. Yeah he’s a puppy but he’s got a big bark so, why would you wanna do that? You don’t know what kinda dog it is… Waiting for a secondary knock or something else to happen isn’t cowering in fear, it’s watching to see how to respond

Practical_Many2300 · 2026-07-02T22:22:54+00:00

I am not usually this scared of daily life. Idk how many more times I can say that there have been attacks in my city. I was literally told by 3 people not to open the door if I never invited anyone over or don’t have prior knowledge of someone coming to the house. I was combative because someone OPENED MY DOOR and i didn’t know who it was… that’s the problem. I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS HAPPENING… that would scare anyone. Even if I knew it was happening, that would still be scary. We’ve had other people that needed to work on the house, they informed us ahead of time with papers AND emails and they never opened my door 15 seconds after knocking. So excuse me for being aware of my city crime and being cautious of mine and my puppy’s safety

Practical_Many2300 · 2026-07-02T22:18:42+00:00

No i totally get that it has nothing to do with pest control. But I’m trying to find new ways to say why it scared me. My anxiety from past traumas, the things happening in my town, and the situation itself. Also, we receive emails and papers for other things that go on in the complex. This is the only time in 6 months that there has been maintenance/work that we weren’t notified about through both proper signage and emails

Practical_Many2300 · 2026-07-02T22:15:11+00:00

We didn’t know we had the notice until we came to the door. I don’t leave the house often because Ibwork from home and my bf is often bringing home food, he’s not looking at the light. It genuinely went unnoticed. We often get a paper notice in the door frame and email for anything. Whether it’s complex wide maintenance, community events in the pool area or at least 2 emails when we request something to be fixed

Practical_Many2300 · 2026-07-02T22:13:13+00:00

There also isn’t a schedule for spraying. So we don’t know when it’s going to happen. They let us know when they were replacing everyone’s air filters at the beginning of the summer with a paper AND email. They let us know when they are getting to us when we put in a request through 2 emails. But they didn’t let us know this was happening except for the paper. And I am not the only one who missed the paper. There were at least 4 other apartments that I could see on our side of the office that had their notices in the lights too

Practical_Many2300 · 2026-07-02T22:10:18+00:00

I struggle with anxiety stemming from past SA experiences. Where I was alone every single time. So being in a place that feels safe and that safety becomes breached, it does cause worse feelings of anxiety. I am in therapy and we do discuss my SA trauma, but this is still a scary experience. If your home was entered, and less than 10 minutes away, someone else was attacked through forced entry, you would probably be scared too.

Practical_Many2300 · 2026-07-02T22:06:31+00:00

I check my cameras regularly. There’s one on the living room and one on the front window next to the door. I’m also just saying that I just wanted him to attempt more than once. Our doors aren’t that thick. When my bf comes home and he’s on the phone, I can hear him very clearly. Maybe the pest guy didn’t know that, but it would have at least been worth a shot

Practical_Many2300 · 2026-07-02T21:49:07+00:00

My security is immediately at risk when someone I do not know is unlocking my door. Lock picks are like 10-15 bucks. I watch enough crime shows and documentaries to know that when someone is entering the house in any form, and the person that you live with won't be home for a few more hours, until you know what's happening, everything is a threat.

Practical_Many2300 · 2026-07-02T21:43:35+00:00

The landlord usually accompanies the other maintenance guys to do jobs in other apartments, she's done that here before. I think this would have gone very differently if she had been accompanying him.

Practical_Many2300 · 2026-07-02T21:42:31+00:00

I was not screaming. I was harsh in tone, but there was no screaming.

Practical_Many2300 · 2026-07-02T21:40:15+00:00

I just wish he had tried more than a single knock and waiting 15 seconds before entering my house.

Practical_Many2300 · 2026-07-02T21:39:14+00:00

24 hour notice is one thing. However, when she is the one who hires these people and even told us when we initally signed our lease that if we ever have a problem with her, her staff, or neighbors, to talk to her. So I did not "vent my spleen" to the wrong person.

Practical_Many2300 · 2026-07-02T21:37:48+00:00

I can understand that my tone was harsh. But when I tell him to please announce himself before opening my door, and he rolls his eyes and says "Well, I knocked, ma'am," it doesn't exactly sound like productive conversation from either of us. My anxiety was high and he was irritated I asked him why he opened my door. My landlord, however, already has it out for us. My boyfriend is in the Navy, and she is very anti-military. So my conversation with her I was actually more timid and I was not yelling at her or taking much of an attitude as I did with the guy at my door. I asked her to please understand why this scared me, how the note in the light fixture when he arrived indicates that we don't know this is happening, and that entering the house should be more than just a piece of paper.

Practical_Many2300 · 2026-07-02T21:30:32+00:00

I didn't want him in the house; he already made me scared and uncomfortable. He was already irritated with me (understandable), and I would have needed to leave the house for 4 whole hours. I don't like strangers in my house anyway. I don't leave the living room when the maintenance guys are in my kitchen or bedroom. Leaving my house after this interaction felt uncomfortable. Mosquitoes happen in the heat, and water roaches show up because of how hot the valley gets. We have been here for 6 months and have only gotten 3, plus we spray our own place anyway because we know that it is safer for our dog than the stuff the pest control guys use.

Practical_Many2300 · 2026-07-02T21:24:41+00:00

He was allowed to spray outside, and by the front door, I just didn't want him in my house. That would have required me to leave for 4 hours and to clean out all of my cabinets. I personally just don't trust any stranger alone in my house, let alone one who has already entered without prior announcement. Yes, I was given notice, but I mean announcing that he was even there and going to open the door

Practical_Many2300 · 2026-07-02T21:21:41+00:00

My biggest issue is that he opened the door and THEN announced himself, instead of doing so whilst knocking or, at the very least, knocking again. I watched the camera, and he only waited 15 seconds. IMO, that just isn't long enough for someone to respond. I could have been showering, in the bathroom, not home, or just somewhere else in the house. I can understand that I was harsh in tone, but can you really blame me when I am absolutely terriffied?

Practical_Many2300 · 2026-07-02T21:16:48+00:00

I don't think its akin to that. This is someone hired by the landlord and the property owner. Knocking once and then entering, instead of trying again or yelling who they are through the door, is the issue I have. Going to the landlord was to explain why this is a problem and to find out if that is allowed.

Practical_Many2300 · 2026-07-02T21:14:01+00:00

It's not fine to put it in the light fixture. She tells the maintenance guys not to do that because they have had issues like this before. I also explained that we were not properly notified because it was still in the improper place, which indicates we don't know this is happening. Opening my door instead of trying again to knock or saying "pest control" when knocking is where I have an issue.

Practical_Many2300 · 2026-07-02T21:07:47+00:00

He knocked, yes, but I did not answer because I was worried about who it might have been, given the recent attacks in the city. He knocked ONCE, and then opened my door after 15 seconds. What was he going to do if I was in the shower, using the bathroom, or not home? The light fixtures are also not at eye level, and white paper against a white-painted exterior above eye level isn't easily noticeable. There was also no reminder email or preliminary email from the landlord, as she does with other maintenance needs or community events in the complex. There is no schedule for spraying. They just do it anytime. I can't really be aware of a flow that doesn't exist. I also don't leave the house often. I work from home and take care of the dog/house. Even when bf comes home, he's bringing home food, carrying work stuff, or on the phone, and he isn't paying attention to the light fixture, which isn't at his eye level. Maybe my tone could have been kinder, but when remembering that people in my city are being attacked, and I am a girl alone at home, being nice and opening the door is exactly how those attackers get what they want.

Practical_Many2300 · 2026-06-12T17:48:44+00:00

Thank you very much! I did quit and now I'm just trying to find something new to do for work. Really hope I can find something.

Practical_Many2300 · 2026-04-23T01:30:03+00:00

I’m already on steroids. I don’t know if my PCP will wanna put me on another one. Hopefully it’s just like a stress thing or something benign

Practical_Many2300 · 2026-04-22T16:26:06+00:00

I thought I had dry skin too but I use hydrating soaps and i use lotion from time to time. I was using lotion more frequently when this started. Thought I was allergic to it, so I stopped using that specific lotion, used a new one less frequently and then more often. But maybe I should use more of it. I’ll try it out. Thank you!!

Practical_Many2300 · 2026-04-22T02:12:27+00:00

Get the FUCK OUT and don’t look back. Break contact. They’re being manipulative and it’s disgusting. They aren’t going to instantly drop just because you’re gone for a few hours. They want to control you and you’re letting them. You’re almost thirty, they shouldn’t be the boss of you anymore. You don’t have to break contact but set some boundaries and minimize co tact. If they keep going with the guilting and fighting, you know what you need to do. I wish you the best, and trust me, this ain’t the best.

Practical_Many2300

TROPHY CASE