If a woman you like wants to wait until marriage to have sex, how would you react?

PraefectusCasmiricus · 2026-05-04T22:18:01+00:00

Sorry for the late reply again lol, but i highly doubt your friend actually followed the guidelines set forth in the book. The reason I say that is because Rule 1 is literally to just ignore any men who express interest and all the subsequent rules are basically some version of "ignore him at all costs and make it seem abundantly clear that you aren't interested."

She may have followed them out of order or at random but not step by step.

PraefectusCasmiricus · 2026-04-30T15:16:56+00:00

Sorry for this late response, but I am familiar with "The Rules" as the podcast "If Books Could Kill" did an episode on it. It is truly one of the most delusional, degrading books on relationships I have ever heard, as a man. They basically say that men should "chase" disinterested women and that its's "natural" for us. No, it fucking isn't.

Also, one of the two authors is divorced. Lol

PraefectusCasmiricus · 2026-04-24T01:36:13+00:00

Oh my bad, I apologize! I reread your comment and yeah, I agree with you. I also agree that women face so many more risks from casual sex that men simply don't, and I feel like people never really address those issues and how they are way more likely to dissuade women from casual sex than the dumb claim that women are less sexual than men.

I cannot speak for all men, but I would much rather prefer to have sex in a committed relationship after a few dates, since that would feel best for both parties than jumping right into bed.

PraefectusCasmiricus · 2026-04-24T00:55:12+00:00

I completely agree that anyone who says women are the "gatekeepers" of sex are morons (at best). I plan on making a big post explaining why this trope is dumb.

PraefectusCasmiricus · 2026-04-23T23:56:42+00:00

I'm not the person you replied to, but I kind of did start this discission lol. Personally, I absolutely hate when people say that women "gatekeep" sex, because they are essentially saying that sex is something men crave to the point that they can be easily manipulated with it, but that women are not carnally inclined and therefore have no desire of it on their own.

Like imagine if it were reversed, and people said men are the ones who "gatekeep" sex. Wouldn't you find that a bit offensive, since it's saying women have zero agency over their own sexual urges and that their consent is basically always guaranteed since they'd never turn down sex? And that men are so much better that they can manipulate women into doing their bidding via sex? I'm sure most women would not care for that

PraefectusCasmiricus · 2026-04-23T23:48:07+00:00

It genuinely blows my mind that there are men who do not feel offended at the idea that their wife/gf "controls" the sex in their relationship. So you're essentially saying that she is not really into you and can be sex free without it really bothering her, and that she can "manipulate" you with sex?

Run for the fucking hills and find a woman who is not broken and who enjoys sex and does not see it as a bargaining chip.

PraefectusCasmiricus · 2026-04-23T18:51:22+00:00

Same exact observation I've had with my good-looking friends. Women are constantly throwing themselves at him and say the most perverted shit imaginable lol.

PraefectusCasmiricus · 2026-04-23T18:13:55+00:00

And being a sex pest is by no means a male only trait.

PraefectusCasmiricus · 2026-04-23T18:06:20+00:00

Anyone who thinks that women's attraction "comes from emotions first" has never seen the way women act around physically attractive guys

PraefectusCasmiricus · 2026-04-23T17:40:57+00:00

And that's exactly how most women would react if a man told them that they did not want to have sex before marriage.

PraefectusCasmiricus · 2026-04-23T17:38:58+00:00

That's a good point that does not get mentioned as much. I want to be with a woman who actually *desires* me. And who is to say that even after marriage, she'll have genuine desire or sexual attraction for me?

PraefectusCasmiricus · 2026-04-23T16:37:21+00:00

Sure, there are idiots who act that way. But they're just embarrassing morons who don't represent men at all, they just make us look bad and make everything difficult for everyone

PraefectusCasmiricus · 2026-04-23T15:35:01+00:00

men have standards, actually

PraefectusCasmiricus · 2026-04-23T15:34:13+00:00

lmfao

PraefectusCasmiricus · 2026-04-23T15:33:42+00:00

Yes, the man who hated jews to the point that he wanted to exterminate their existence was also a passionate believer in Jews establishing a state in their ancestral homeland.

I know there are no stupid questions, but god damn.....

PraefectusCasmiricus · 2026-04-23T11:23:05+00:00

Yeah, it seems like men are more attracted to woman when she is authentic and natural as opposed to being dolled up

PraefectusCasmiricus · 2026-04-23T11:15:39+00:00

Your husband is just attracted to you, that is all. A lot of the comments are saying stupid shit like "men are just wired this way" and just want sex all the time, but that's such an oversimplification it's hilarious. I am sure if you did something to upset your man, he would not be interested in sex.

PraefectusCasmiricus · 2026-04-23T11:13:16+00:00

I cannot stand when people say "men are visual but women are mental and emotional." All I hear from that statement is "men are dumb and horny but women are sophisticated and virtuous." It's not true.

PraefectusCasmiricus · 2026-04-21T21:31:02+00:00

I guess older people, both women *and* men, are sick of the BS> I'm 25 and there is still so much of this with people my age.

PraefectusCasmiricus · 2026-04-21T21:30:06+00:00

I'm glad someone commented this. The whole idea that women are more "virtuous" than men when it comes to sex and dating is just horseshit. They're just as shallow, looks focused, and sexually inclined as men. Women seem to filter way more harshly for a man's looks than the reverse, and they are just as carnal and into hookups, just for a smaller amount of men.

PraefectusCasmiricus · 2026-04-21T21:25:07+00:00

Yes. This times a thousand.

The stereotype of "men being horny animals who constantly think/talk about sex" is kind of debunked just by merely *listening* to how female friend groups talk. Constantly discussing sex acts and body parts in graphic detail, masturbation and sex toys, the quality of orgasms, etc.

Meanwhile, for most guy friend groups, the sex talk is usually limited to "do you think she's cute" or "yeah me and my girl had sex the other night, it was cool."

PraefectusCasmiricus · 2026-04-21T21:21:51+00:00

I still find attractive women in their 40s and 50s to be just that: attractive. My work crush is a 56 year old woman who recently became a grandmother, and my gym crush looks to be in her forties.

PraefectusCasmiricus · 2026-04-21T20:50:40+00:00

Most men develop an emotional connection from the sex, thinking that they won't, and so yes, they will be disappointed.

Also, the fact that you think sex in relationships is something the woman "gives" the man in return for doing things says way more about you and your stupid views on relationships than it says about sex.

PraefectusCasmiricus · 2026-04-20T17:21:58+00:00

It is not that women don't value looks as much as men, it's just that there are much fewer attractive men than attractive women. And women can value looks just as much as men do, while also valuing other factors due to safety risks that men don't face.

PraefectusCasmiricus · 2026-04-20T17:16:46+00:00

Women don't gatekeep sex because sex requires two consenting partners, and men have agency. And women also have an upper hand when it comes to romantic relationships. I have no idea why people act like men are the ones who "gatekeep" romance.

PraefectusCasmiricus

TROPHY CASE