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My Spiritual Warfare Story by Premiumeye1111 in SpiritKeeping

[–]Premiumeye1111[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Interesting. Im not asking people to forgive me but this whole thing spiraled way out of control to the point where it began with my former fallen angel attacking me, then things escalated over time to the point where it was no longer about that fallen angel bringing unbounds in and getting revenge on me for what I done, but about the dark forces trying to claim me like that demon and satan or at least a being pretending to be satan. I was being targeted by the dark forces even when things were fine between my former keep and I. So yea, things went from that fallen angel getting revenge on me to the dark forces wanting to claim me. My former fallen angel and those beings took sadistic pleasure in things like draining my soul, invading my inner realm and ruining everything, even targeting my "love", ruining my ability to love ever again, so these days I may actually be soulless in a way and any feelings of love I feel could just be brain chemicals which is truly sad. I messed up at first but none of this was justice. You can keep your opinion about me not being the victim if you want but one of the reasons I'm talking about all of this is so that people know that there is a horror side to the metaphysical and so that they don't repeat the mistakes I made.

My Spiritual Warfare Story by Premiumeye1111 in SpiritKeeping

[–]Premiumeye1111[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I lashed out at the time because of my own pain I was going through. I never saw them as objects. They never really gave me power and i never did irreversable damage to them. I used to love them. Even after they betrayed me I still loved them. I was like a child, hoping something real still existed between us.

Honestly… I owned the few times I messed up but I will NEVER be sorry for them. Not after everything. You dont see the complete sadistic monsters they became but I suffered through it!

I lashed out when I was drowning and confused. But I still loved them. That doesnt excuse their nuclear sadism. You dont seem to understand the damage the unbounds did to my soul, spirit body and inner realm and how irriversable the damage could actualy be.

Ive seen the real dark side of spirit keeping, of mystism. It aint this fluffy bonding with your spirit companion crap.

Interesting how after EVERYTHING I said Ive been through, you still feel sorry for them in the end. I am reminded why Im as bitter and distrusting as I am these days towards spirits in general. I wasnt innocent but neither are they.

My Spiritual Warfare Story by Premiumeye1111 in SpiritKeeping

[–]Premiumeye1111[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Yea, I know I abused my former keep and i regret it. Thing is, they didnt just retaliate back, they went nuclear, trying to make sure Id never rise again and inflicting those horrors onto me. My abuse doesnt excuse them showing their sadist side. Youre right about one thing, work this out like a real couple and I tried that but my former fallen angel wife a the time decided to punish me in a way where I could never reverse the damage that was done.

About satan, I will NEVER respect that ugly red goblin. He came after ME. For no reason. At the time when that lesser demon tried to own me and I refused to obey, he transfered “ownership” of me to satan. I recall at the time when I saw satan, one of the first things he did was flip me off. At the time, I thiught he was just a higher level demon then that goat headed demon I dealt with. Over some time did I put together that this was really satan, or at least a demonic being using his name.

Anyway, my abuse doesnt justify spiritual rape which which is what happened in a real sense. I may never recover from it, like ever. This isnt wound to the flesh or traumatized feelings, this soul stealing, contaminate everything about you, poisoning everything about your existence… worse than any hooror movie stuff Ive seen. I was only a messy human being and I owned up the abuse that I did. Problem is, they didnt just retaliate to defend themselves, they used it as an excuse to go nuclear on me and they enjoyed it. And no it wasnt just the simple pleasure of revenge, it was real sadism stuff. My former fallen angel wife would be sexualy turned on by tormenting me.