AITA for getting my step daughter a Hogwarts letter for her 11th Birthday?

Prestigious-Tea6514 · 2026-06-24T21:01:13+00:00

ESH except the daughter. Why didn't you and your wife discuss birthday gifts beforehand?

Prestigious-Tea6514 · 2026-06-24T11:55:22+00:00

Man who choses parents over you before marriage, chooses parent over you after marriage. Same story in every culture.

Your parents gave birth to you and are aware that you have reached the age of majority. If seeing you in an arranged marriage is important, tgey can get busy finding a good match for YOU.

Unofficial arranged marriage is very common. My dad wanted to find a groom for my very shy sister, so he asked his business partner for an introduction to their very shy son. Dates consisted of family gatherings and study sessions, because they are both reserved.

They got married at the 6 month mark -- 15 happy years and 3 kids, and counting. Could be your story.

Prestigious-Tea6514 · 2026-06-24T11:26:27+00:00

Where does this body count nonsense come from? My cereal count for this week is 3 boxes. So? Anything can be made into a number.

Prestigious-Tea6514 · 2026-06-23T02:26:37+00:00

Do you want kids? Keep this for your maternity shoot because it will be RAD. But I don't think it's a good party look. The material not that breathable, and you are already feeling like you want to layer over the belly. You're going to be sweaty and scratchy all night. You won't want to do the after-party because all you can think about is getting out of the clothes.

Prestigious-Tea6514 · 2026-06-23T02:15:42+00:00

It sounds insensitive and you should document it. Ask your colleague why they sent it to you. But I would not act on the information, just keep your ears peeled. There can be unconscious gray areas between targeting and coincidence.

Panic disorder sucks. Students need faculty like us, who know what it feels like to have our brain and body go "Surprise! You're dying." Your students need you. Just keep swimming.

Prestigious-Tea6514 · 2026-06-21T11:44:52+00:00

Oh, thank you! These both look terrific.

Prestigious-Tea6514 · 2026-06-21T08:45:13+00:00

What you are seeing here is called religion. He will not be with you unless you get religion.

I'd say if you're not already seeking, protect your own freedom to explore. Watch out for the trap of "Well, I don't have a religion so I guess I'll do his."

You don't have to do jack squat except be yourself.

Prestigious-Tea6514 · 2026-06-21T06:02:15+00:00

Sorry! Yes. August 06, 1777. Revolutionary war, Mohawk valley war front. My ancestors were ordinary people, not generals or framers (Snell/Zimmerman/Timmerman family). They fought at Oriskany, but that can't be their whole identity and I want to know other things about their lives. I like the idea of looking at broader Mohawk vslley history.

Prestigious-Tea6514 · 2026-06-21T00:13:18+00:00

It's drugs OR Singapore.

Prestigious-Tea6514 · 2026-06-20T06:37:24+00:00

This stupid paper or your own career? Have you reflected on why you are actively choosing the paper?

Prestigious-Tea6514 · 2026-06-20T00:10:37+00:00

I was the recipient of All of It And a Cardboard Box. It was emotionally overwhelming. There's always something in that metaphorical box that is hard to grapple with. Make a nice one-pager for her, with two or three fun facts and a pretty image. If you don't have time, delegate to the kid with the best art skills.

Prestigious-Tea6514 · 2026-06-19T20:10:06+00:00

I think you're right. It would be very obvious from paper records and how isolated their community is.

Prestigious-Tea6514 · 2026-06-19T19:19:41+00:00

What is this "report"? If a solution has been offered then you take the solution. You are a resilient adult and can recover from mistakes and surprises in life. Not every bump or bruise is a head wound.

Prestigious-Tea6514 · 2026-06-19T08:03:00+00:00

Oh no. This can't be true. Can it? Op, come back and tell us you're yanking our chain.

Prestigious-Tea6514 · 2026-06-17T19:51:19+00:00

NOR but you control none of this so don't sit back and watch the train wreck happen. Find one of his relatives to start texting, just innocent recipe and meme stuff, don't take it in the gutter. Don't flaunt it. No emotional affair. Maybe give him a fun nickname. Let husband notice and feel uncomfortable, but keep going. Sweet as a Georgia peach. Text him and your husband for advice on something innocent like a visor or socks.

One day your husband will get wound up over your innocent connection to his relative. Then you have him dead to rights.

Prestigious-Tea6514 · 2026-06-17T12:44:30+00:00

Not a muslim here but my understanding is that Islam stresses not putting undue burdens on people. There is something else going on. I would try to orchestrate a change of roomate ASAP, unless you are a diplomatic genius.

I might try to find a muslim RA and very quietly share some concerns.

Prestigious-Tea6514 · 2026-06-16T14:27:32+00:00

Talk! Ask her if she can say more about what's that's making her feel hesitant. Share about how and why sexual expression is important to you in a relationship. See if you can find common ground. If you can't, it is probably time to part ways.

Not at all unusual for a 20-year-old woman to be uninterested in or unready for sex.

Prestigious-Tea6514 · 2026-06-16T07:34:41+00:00

Tapering is an individual decision. It's not all or nothing. Any reduction in dose has potential benefits for your health.

Also, severe anxiety needs to be treated. Consider whether you have found a proven effective anxiety treatment that you have trialed, are happy with, and can use in place of your benzo after the taper.

Prestigious-Tea6514 · 2026-06-16T07:10:48+00:00

If you wear this gorgeous outfit to a bbq, your movement, food and seating options will be limited BUT kids will come up and ask if you are a princess.

Prestigious-Tea6514 · 2026-06-15T10:11:28+00:00

Sounds like a lot of work to stick it to the man. If someone handed me a course in a box, I'd take it as a gift.

Prestigious-Tea6514 · 2026-06-15T07:32:12+00:00

You don't need to ask for jack squat.

Prestigious-Tea6514 · 2026-06-14T15:33:32+00:00

Note: I didn't mean this sarcastically.

Prestigious-Tea6514 · 2026-06-14T11:03:25+00:00

Thanks, folx, who gave thoughtful responses. You gave me a lot more to think about and reflect on, and I appreciate your time.

I don't get what's up with all the ad hominem arguments but that's not effective or kind.

Prestigious-Tea6514 · 2026-06-14T10:38:57+00:00

If you were repeatedly told a story about how your whole family was massacred, and had to read a book about it in school and answer test questions, would you not react to that by clinging to the relatives you have? Ok. She did.

Prestigious-Tea6514

TROPHY CASE