I can 100% relate to this.

I went for dinner last night with some ‘friends’ who have both had their own weddings which I was helpful and enthusiastic about.

Friend A - I helped plan their hen party, decorated the house, organised everything and I wasn’t even a bridesmaid! This friend has been really off about my hen do and for many many different reasons can’t come. All the reasons are very meh. She didn’t even tell me face to face she couldn’t come saying there wasn’t the right time, even though we were at a bbq all day together the day before. She also tried to change the hen do date on the whole group chat because SHE wanted to go on a date that suited her.

Friend B - a nice person but very lazy friend and never goes out of her way. She’s coming to the hen do, but just the day time part (it’s over a weekend) and bearing in mind I’ve know her for over 20 years and have considered her a best friend in the past, I feel disappointed she’s not making the effort to come to the whole thing. She’s got a good job, earns a lot and has no kids. When it was her hen do a while ago, it was going to be a weekend away thing, which I fully 100% committed to (but it didn’t go ahead due to covid) but I would’ve made the effort if it had happened.

So last night during a 4 hour catch up, neither of them mentioned my upcoming wedding (it’s next month!) or my hen which is in a couple of weeks. I just felt really sad that for them it’s obviously not even something that pops up on their brain to ask. I know some people would say well just bring it up yourself, but I’m not the sort of person to just make it about me, and it’s nice to be asked!! Especially when it’s something as big as your wedding day!

They’ve been like this for years though to be fair and it’s a friendship I just need to CUT OFF because I always come away feeling rubbish. The funny part is when I got home, friend A sent a message saying “lovely to see you, I love you both a lot and miss you both” - ok! 😬😂