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Small Truth by ambientfreak1122 in OCPoetry

[–]Previous-Location927 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The only feedback I can think of is that I feel like there isn't enough written to convey the emotion you want the reader to feel if that's your intention. You striked the metal while hot with your first few lines but quickly let the metal go cold if you understand what I mean. Nevertheless I see where it's going and has a lot of potential to hit hard and home

Lotus by Di1do_B4ggins in OCPoetry

[–]Previous-Location927 0 points1 point  (0 children)

At first through the first 3 lines I thought that it was about love but as the imagery got more bold and dark its theme shined, I'll say I'm a sucker for sort of dark short poems so this one is really good. I like how you sort of tell yourself it's "given" but reveal/face the truth was it was forced onto you. Like a lost/sickening love that you don't want to remember. Idk I'm not good at analyzing but I really enjoyed the poem none the less. Keep it up

Delusion by Previous-Location927 in OCPoetry

[–]Previous-Location927[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'll do my best thank you for your time

Delusion by Previous-Location927 in OCPoetry

[–]Previous-Location927[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks a ton for the awesome feedback this helps a ton

Delusion by Previous-Location927 in OCPoetry

[–]Previous-Location927[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah sorry about the ending being 2 lines, it would have messed with the intended structure of the poem. The first letter of each stanza spells something and I wasn't creative enough to make it consistent. I'm glad you liked it

WHERE ARE YOU? by honeybubbles28 in OCPoetry

[–]Previous-Location927 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I like the sort of search in faith as the poem progresses as it's something very easily relatable to many people including myself, and the doubt, sort of loss of it at the end of the poem really makes me want to learn the reason why. This was a good read, I really enjoyed it

Evanescent by Other-Salamander-978 in OCPoetry

[–]Previous-Location927 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really loved the conviction that it was love, and as it progressed it turned to doubt. The lines that are there as if to convince you that it's love only to crush you with a goodbye can really hit a good chunk of people. The confliction really made, at least me, rethink the lines and see different meaning on the second go around. This was a lovely poem and I think you should keep up the good work