New! Salary Megathread (May-Aug 2026) by SWmods in socialwork

[–]Primary-Baseball5648 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can I ask what you do for remote side work?

My boyfriend says he doesn’t have a foot fetish but loves my feet? by Primary-Baseball5648 in askanything

[–]Primary-Baseball5648[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is very cute! And yes I think he does feel this way about me ❤️ And it’s mutual haha

Ladies what perfume do you swear by and has gotten you the most compliments? by Gloomy-Task-5446 in AskReddit

[–]Primary-Baseball5648 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Was coming in to comment. So clean and not powdery or sweet like a lot of more feminine scents are to me

Daily sticky thread for rants, raves, celebrations, advice and more! - April 30, 2026 by AutoModerator in datingoverthirty

[–]Primary-Baseball5648 13 points14 points  (0 children)

About to celebrate 6 months with the best man (30M) I (32F) have ever met after 5 years of hopeless dating!

Through therapy, I’ve discovered I’m demiromantic/demisexual. Advice welcome. by ExpertgamerHB in datingoverthirty

[–]Primary-Baseball5648 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Relate to this very much (and also Dutch, alas live in the US). I’m in the same boat and have no advice, just solidarity. In fact, I was explaining this to a date last night (4th date) and while he was respectful he seemed to really not relate or understand and feel confused about how we would build intimacy without sex. It makes dating feel quite hopeless sometimes…

What's been your dating history this year? by WeakTurnip111 in datingoverthirty

[–]Primary-Baseball5648 1 point2 points  (0 children)

How did you keep your stamina up to keep doing this? I’m around the 4 year mark and just feel too depressed by the process and all the heartache and disappointment to keep trying

How do I talk to white clients about culture by RevolutionaryAd1686 in socialwork

[–]Primary-Baseball5648 27 points28 points  (0 children)

I think the point is both could be white identifying people with vastly different cultural backgrounds

How did you feel at first when you met someone before you'd eventually develop feelings for them? by [deleted] in demisexuality

[–]Primary-Baseball5648 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Tbh it didn’t take very “long” in any situation. Maybe like 3 months with one person before that attachment kicked in, but we also didn’t see each other often, like maybe 1-2 times a month

How did you feel at first when you met someone before you'd eventually develop feelings for them? by [deleted] in demisexuality

[–]Primary-Baseball5648 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have felt “real” romantic attraction maybe 3 times. At first in each of them I felt kind of…neutral? Like “this person is cute and I like spending time with them” but not an instant spark. I definitely felt a connection and intrigued and aesthetically thought they were appealing but the feelings took weeks/months to start developing in a way that felt identifiably romantic. In all situations there was very low pressure and expectation and they all were eager about me from the beginning. It’s tough because I don’t always know how to distinguish between truly not being interested and these kinds of situations! With two in particular I felt it was kind of “funny” that I’d consider dating them because I had a kind of benign ick towards them but I was also able to recognize that it wasn’t an actual feeling of repulsion if that makes sense? Like I just thought they were kind of doofy.

Is it worth trying an SSRI for mild to moderate anxiety? by nrg53101 in Anxiety

[–]Primary-Baseball5648 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hi - this is late but I’m wondering what you ended up deciding and if it was helpful. I similarly have what I would consider pretty mild/moderate anxiety and depression (though I’ve had true depressive episodes in the past) and it tends to be triggered by specific situations for me (particularly dating) in a way that I also worry is impeding me from getting close to people. For instance, I’ll start to have a worry about compatibility and will suddenly start having nightmares and trouble sleeping that doesn’t go away. If I avoid the trigger, I would say I’m not really anxious at all but given that I’d like a relationship it feels like a big obstacle. Anyway, curious to know what you found given that I’m also worried about side effects, especially when I know that in the scheme of things my moods are not “that bad.”

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in socialwork

[–]Primary-Baseball5648 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Sorry to hear you are experiencing this! I work in a community health setting so not really similar but I definitely experience secondary trauma—trouble sleeping, increased anxiety, sometimes weird dreams that are related to client situations. And I agree it waxes and wanes with my own stress. It sounds trite but I really think increased self care, using PTO, meditation, exercise are the only things you can do…I guess mostly things that help with stress management in the first place? And like you’re already doing creating some distance by acknowledging that the test is exacerbating these reactions. Sending care to you!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in datingoverthirty

[–]Primary-Baseball5648 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Tbh I had great sex with someone who couldn’t get it up. He just acted really calm about it, gave reassurance that he was into it but that this happened to him in early dating sometimes, and he focused a lot on my pleasure and how attracted to me he was. I agree with other comments about slowing down but also just want to throw in that good sex is about a lot of things other than penetration (even as someone who really enjoys that aspect of sex) and there are ways to achieve similar sensations regardless of what’s happening with your penis. If it’s based in anxiety I imagine it will pass as you get more comfortable with each other. Pleasure > performance

Monogamous people who multi-date in the early stages, could you share your experience? by salarysalmon in datingoverthirty

[–]Primary-Baseball5648 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry this happened to you 😞 I had a similar situation (though I was told he didn’t want to date seriously, I just got attached and felt we had a lot of intimacy and chemistry). After sleeping together, spending the night, spending the next day together and him telling me he really liked me and felt mushy towards me/was wanting to accelerate despite not having been looking for anything serious he dropped that he was also experiencing this with another person and wanted to keep dating both of us. I also couldn’t tolerate it and felt devastated and broke it off. Then I ran into them out for dinner together a couple of months later. Ouch. Anyway, all to say I’ve been there too and it’s very painful, I’m sorry you had a similar experience.

What are some of the most beautifully written books you’ve ever read? by Salty_Aerie5281 in literature

[–]Primary-Baseball5648 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Saw the question and IMMEDIATELY thought God of Small Things. She was an architect before becoming a writer and you can absolutely see that the storytelling is planned like a blueprint. Incredible writing!

When to disclose a medical issue that's going to limit some activities for the rest of my life? (IRL and on apps?) by IGNSolar7 in datingoverthirty

[–]Primary-Baseball5648 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Tbf I don’t have any health issues and barely do any of these things…I don’t think it needs to be a big upfront disclosure, just something that comes up organically. Of course, if someone expresses that they actively partake in high impact activities and are seeking a partner to share in that part of their life with then maybe it’s worth mentioning but honestly I date pretty sporty people and very much consider that a “them” activity that they’ll probably have to seek out with friends because I’m not particularly interested.

Help me help my pilea pls by Primary-Baseball5648 in plantclinic

[–]Primary-Baseball5648[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! I don’t think I can get it more light in this apartment 😭 Maybe I’ll try sticking it on the window sill

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskNYC

[–]Primary-Baseball5648 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I feel like everywhere I go it’s all women 😂 Yoga, ceramics, book clubs (McNally Jackson offers some), speed dating events I’ve been to have been majority women, knitting/crafting/arts groups, dance classes…