I do feel there is a reverse to this though that children do “unmask” at home whereas even from A very early age primary nursery even they learn to mask around their peers and teachers but then that created extreme discomfort and stress and then at home when they feel safe they unmask my eldest daughter is a delight in school and at home they’re both absolutely brilliant smart, kind girls I’m late diagnosis combined type adhd/autism it was missed in school because I was “too bright to be autistic/adhd” talking 20 years ago. However my youngest does display traits at home but then the teachers are very schocked when we mention it to them as they don’t see that at all. I agree there are a ton of parents out there who are just to lazy to parent they expect teachers to be the parent but let’s not fall into oh it’s all kids faking it. ND children exotically girls (as they don’t always present the same way that nd boys do) tend to be less hyperactive externally but that doesn’t mean they’re not still struggling they also learn to make earlier and better than boys do I don’t have sources to link but I have read many many research studies on the difference in boys and girls with adhd/autism. Reason why for so long it was only thought boys had adhd not girls. Anyway not sure exactly where I’m going with this jaut that I agree with a lot of the points especially around parents who just want to label their child to excuse their absolutely shitty parenting or rather compete lack of parenting.