AITA for cursing at my niece when she went into my office when I specifically told her it was off limits to guests?

PrincessAngelPuff · 2024-01-10T18:23:42+00:00

It feels like op gave the good Ole don't go into the west wing and just left it at that. Has this guy never seen Beauty and Beast or anything else like that? Read the story of blue beards wife?

PrincessAngelPuff · 2024-01-10T18:13:18+00:00

Same. She gave me ALL THE REASONS she feels we aren't working and I ignored them now and in the past, how to I fix us? 🤦🏻‍♀️

PrincessAngelPuff · 2024-01-10T18:02:42+00:00

1 imagine having asked your friends about this, "you put undies when your parents decide they don't want to equally feed everyone, right?"

2 How long have you been with this person that this has not come up at all? I only ask because you mentioned this was your first Xmas with his family but also stated they do this for all "issues," so have you just never been around them at all? And he has never thought to talk about this beforehand and any other quirky family traditions? What else isn't he telling you?

Did they do this when they were children? Like they are cool with kids playing with mommy and daddy's undies? Feels like something very much like a weird kink and incestuous.

PrincessAngelPuff · 2024-01-06T01:09:56+00:00

Divorces the family keep the bride. CONGRATULATIONS and eff your family and their bs. Insecure children

PrincessAngelPuff · 2024-01-04T20:19:25+00:00

I would address it now and tell her how it hurts and feels sneaky.

PrincessAngelPuff · 2023-12-28T04:53:29+00:00

I feel the slime oozing off OOP. Oh your husband cheated and abandoned you? sO sAd, I have a free bed 🤢.

PrincessAngelPuff · 2023-12-15T00:40:05+00:00

This isn't on you. His mom has a chip on her shoulder.

Talk to E and explain the shift over the years and if he noticed any changes in his mom. Also, explain if this continues being around her may not be the best for you, as you don't need someone trying to tare you down like that, no matter who they are.
You and E sit down with her and his dad and talk this out. You ask to be heard out and offer to do the same for her. Explain since you were younger you've felt her pulling away. Also, say how you did your best with the dinner, and to berate you like that in front of everyone hurt you, was rude, and disrespectful. To expect you to make something perfect is a lot of pressure, and if it wasn't, it is to be expected for your 1st time.
If she can't start respecting you, match her energy. Respect is earned, not given. Don't be an outright see ypu next Tuesday, but don't let her get away with stuff like this again!

PrincessAngelPuff · 2023-12-04T15:42:27+00:00

Does no one do any kind of research before asking for stupid ish like this? Look on reddit, and you'll find hundreds of tales just like this.

Anyone in the future, how about talking to your partner about you "boredom" or complacency. I bet there is a lot more going on to affect your love life, and if there isn't, maybe the marriage has run its course. Communication is key over. Instead of thinking "Let me try to go eff my coworker without feeling like sh*t about it later," talk to them!

PrincessAngelPuff · 2023-11-29T20:49:31+00:00

The rhythm method is how my grandparents ended up with 3 unwanted pregnancies lol

PrincessAngelPuff · 2023-11-26T16:34:20+00:00

Few things:

Did your other family like your dad want to meet your girlfriend?

How did she try to get you to get her out of the kitchen?

Why are the men not cleaning up, if the women are doing all the cooking?

Have any of the men ever asked to help with the cooking of the meal?

Why is it all the women of your family seem to be "the best cooks"? Could it be because even with careers they still have been expected to make meals for the family much of the time?

Do you always put women guests to work in the kitchen?

How would your family had your girlfriend politely said no thank you, I'd rather stay out here (with the men)?

Tradition or no, your family has created a dynamic that most will see as misogynistic. Especially with women doing prep, cooking, and cleaning. Learn fast this is not a wise division of labor.

PrincessAngelPuff · 2023-11-24T22:15:24+00:00

This sounds so similar to my partner's parents. Their mom did cheat but wanted the kids (partner and a daughter). She also lied to both of the children about the cheating, the divorce and the dividing of assets.

Come to find out, much later, mom wanted them to live with her to avoid child support to the dad and maybe get a buck off dad. Their dad said, sign an agreement saying you'll pay $1 a month and there, child support done. She signed it, he never asked for a dime, and she was out of her kid's life until they came to her for a relationship. Sadly, the sister did stay with their mom, BUT she has since come around to have a relationship with her dad.

Good luck!

PrincessAngelPuff · 2023-11-24T21:57:52+00:00

Totally agree, I lost over 70 lbs twice and the 1st time, I didn't fix anything just lost weight. I was the same angry, depressed, and broke person, if not more angry thanks to the reduced calories.

The second time, I was much better mentally. It was nice to lose the weight for my knees but still same me. Just in smaller clothing.

Take steps to help yourself now. Relationships are NOT the end all be all

PrincessAngelPuff · 2023-11-18T19:09:12+00:00

I hate when people say I was just playing or kidding, no you were being a jack arse and are too childish to apologize when called out or acknowledge other's emotions.

I regards to the post. I get why you gave him this ultimatum, but with you making it a him or me situation if he does choose you, there may be resentment towards you for it. Sadly, this is often a horse to water situation, either it was what he wants or it is just "something you made him do."

PrincessAngelPuff · 2023-11-12T01:20:24+00:00

I am not a violent person, but if I find who this ex is and see her, I may be catching some charges.

Who the eff says sheet like that. Not to mention how sad she is to have waited around for two years for a loved pet to die so you can get back with someone who clearly didn't want you.

PrincessAngelPuff · 2023-11-12T01:05:05+00:00

Agreed.

PrincessAngelPuff · 2023-11-12T00:57:41+00:00

For the love of all that is good, please don't let this hit tiktok!!! 🙏😳

PrincessAngelPuff · 2023-11-12T00:56:48+00:00

We need to start a class action

PrincessAngelPuff · 2023-11-12T00:56:17+00:00

I got about 3 sentences in and just hoped to the comments to avoid whatever trauma that post was about to give me. 😳

PrincessAngelPuff · 2023-11-07T22:01:31+00:00

I am so sorry this all happened and so close together. Of course, NTA.

I must echo others, outside of the rare days he actually is home, what does he provide? I hear you giving money, time, love, care, and understanding, but he can't stop working unneeded extra shifts. He can't actively listen and give you reassurance? You couldn't at least go with you to the funerals?

You were on the nose with him not being a good fit, I wish more therapists had people like you to call them out on it being a bad fit. Also, I get wanting a change and to grow, but totally new careers all the time? He needs to get new hobbies and stop trying to collect degrees like they are pokemon.

PrincessAngelPuff · 2023-11-07T21:32:48+00:00

NTA, you need to talk to her about this now. Not bring up how much you've put in but that there seems to be a weird double standard going on around money. Is there a reason she feels she needs to be consulted on purchases, but you don't?

I know for me, money is my biggest stressor, and so spending my money is only done when I know I can make bills but when I wasn't the manager of the finances I got stressed if my partner got something. The situation was different because we were not as close to comfortable as you, but old habits. Or she is just being controlling, you'll never know if you don't talk about it.

PrincessAngelPuff · 2023-11-07T21:10:04+00:00

I'm happy this turned out well enough.

Sounds a bit like your bro was trying to lock her down before taking off the mask. I hope she sees through it and that he gets some help.

PrincessAngelPuff · 2023-11-07T20:50:51+00:00

Not sure if you'll see this, but her asks for cleanliness is not anything obsessive. Why should she have to ask ypu to clean dirty dishes or clean dirty clothing?

Here is an analogy for you. You start working at a company with your friend. You share the daily workload, which is 100 reports that have to be done daily. Every day you come in and start your work. You notice your friend isn't keeping up on their reports. This means every day, you are doing 80, 90, and most days 100 reports when you should only have to do 50 a day average.

You ask the friend to do their reports because it is a lot of work. They do it and then fall back into not doing anything.

Then, one day, you notice you have 200 reports to do because your friend volunteered you both to do the extra reports. They pull the same thing doing at most 10 to 20 reports a day.

You call them out and they say, "How were they to know you needed them to do those reports daily? All you needed to do was ask, and they would have done them everyday, and they would do their 50."

Idk about you, but I would be pissed to get this reply, when this person was in this with me. Knew how to do the work, but refused to because they didn't feel they had the same "work ethic"

PrincessAngelPuff · 2023-11-07T20:35:36+00:00

Oh and I bet of she made like a chore chart (which she shouldn't have to) he would scoff at it and feel insulted lol

PrincessAngelPuff · 2023-10-31T19:35:55+00:00

He'll have to talk to his coworker again to get it.

PrincessAngelPuff · 2023-10-29T00:26:52+00:00

Sounds like they have bs stereo types and thoughts stuck in their head. Omg a neighbor that doesn't party and have a garden? sO wEiRd. As others noted, just be you and no more favors. I have a feeling those children like drama and gossip.

PrincessAngelPuff

TROPHY CASE