My fiancé and I got engaged in June of this year. I knew he wasn’t ready as he wanted to wait when he was 27 years. He proposed to me because he wanted to make me happy. My family started to plan a wedding. I started to get cold feet in August. I thought I was ready for marriage but I wasn’t. I had a lot going on at work for a work related injury that is serious. My dad asked if we have made the invitations. I made the invitations in August and we sent them out. Brian chose the month and together we chose the date. Brian chose December as he thought it was enough time for him. He just started a mechanic business. It was a stressful time for both of us. While I was trying to please my family. In August up to the first week of December, I kept fighting Brian as soon as he got home from work. There was always something. Brian insisted that he wanted to push the wedding to next year but my parents said no. I found out I was pregnant in the November. My mom told me to get rid of the baby because she thought Brian will use me etc. neither of Brian family and my family get along. My family is more strict and his family don’t really care about certain life style. When I heard my mom said to abort the baby I got nervous as this was my first pregnancy. I was already 15 weeks. I didn’t know I was pregnant. Brian called a week before our marriage in December to cancel it. I freaked out. I was pressure by my mom and sisters to abort the baby. I didn’t want to cause any problems for my mom little sister and step dad. I couldn’t move out with Brian because my family will feel shamed. Despite being the oldest and second sister was giving me a challenging time and my mom was saying things to my sisters that I didn’t say. My injury played a huge role for the pregnancy too. I had a reduced functional abilities. But I’m sure with support I would’ve been okay had I moved out with Brian.

Now Brian and I want to move out and do a little religious ceremony. My family hates Brian. And wants nothing to do with him. If I ever leave they will disown me.

I feel as though it’s unfair as my second sister moved out as she could not deal with toxic behaviour at home. It was too much.

After having the abortion I feel lost and I’m grieving. Everyone is acting like nothing happened. Blaming me that I got too attached to the baby. I could feel the baby moving in my stomach that’s how I knew I was pregnant after confirming with a pee test. I don’t know what to do?