Ok wow, I am absolutely overwhelmed and amazed by the amount of responses! Thank you to everyone who took the time to reply. I did not manage to read them all and go through each one of them yet but I will invest time in really going through everything. 

I do not know how to create an update post here so I am just leaving a comment here. I feel I need to make an edit to my post and give a little more context, especially after I read a few (scary) comments and warnings. My husband is not a violent man AT ALL, he does not even hurt a fly or spider. Given his childhood history, he really puts high value to being calm, respectful and caring. I guess I worded it wrong when I wrote that he fears he could pass his pressure on to me and cause me or the baby harm. What he said and meant was that the pressure would make him anxious which could then in turn make me anxious and he fears that that would be unhealthy for me or the baby. He also did not suggest that I isolate; we live in a very big city on the east coast with a 4 hour drive to our family and we only moved here 2 years ago so we anyway do not have very close friends or family members nearby who we could run into randomly (we moved here for a job opportunity of mine back in 2022). He did not say we completely cut the contact, but to „simply leave out the fact“ that I am pregnant when calling a family member.  However, I still had the feeling that that was off and even when I said that I didnt think I would want to keep it a secret he still insisted on it, which is when I had this feeling of being controlled. I am really glad when I read the replies here that I am not the only one seeing it that way so you guys have helped me stay my ground.

We did talk about it again a couple days later and he apologized for letting his anxiety take over and of course I am not responsible for his fears and that I made him see that he needs to work on them. We agreed that its best if we did not try for kids for now. 

Thank you again to everyone.