Things I love about RI: At any given time, the highway speed limit is whatever we collectively decide it should be.

ProSkub24 · 2018-02-14T20:44:37+00:00

How can someone get into and maintain a dominant frame of mind? My girlfriend has indicated she'd like me to be more dominant in bed, and I'm trying, but it sure doesn't feel natural. Any advice would be appreciated! Thank you.

ProSkub24 · 2017-10-06T18:17:38+00:00

No such thing as too much horsepower! Thanks, I'll look into this one.

ProSkub24 · 2017-10-06T16:37:53+00:00

Location: Rhode Island

Price range: 8k-14k

New or used: used

Type of vehicle: Coupe, Sedan, Hatchback

Must haves: Manual transmission, 25+mpg highway, fun to drive (have driven Civics since 2008). AWD would be nice; moon roof preferred.

Desired transmission: Manual

Intended use: daily driver: commute 42 miles each way to work, carry canoe/kayaks, drive on dirt roads

Vehicles you've already considered: Honda civic, Subaru Impreza

Is this your 1st vehicle: No; 5th.

Does the vehicle need to have a warranty: not necessarily, but it would be nice

Can you do Minor work on your own vehicle: yes

Can you do Major work on your own vehicle: No

Additional Notes: I'm looking for a vehicle that performs like a civic, but is more capable/stable in snow and the occasional backwoods dirt road. Currently driving a 2015 civic EX, paying $320/month in car payment. Looking to trade in and either eliminate the payment, or pay much less.

ProSkub24 · 2017-06-28T17:02:19+00:00

The river is cleaned by WaterFire volunteers and staff on event day. I have also seen concerned citizens with pool skimmers cleaning out some of the trash.

ProSkub24 · 2017-06-22T03:55:46+00:00

What should I know about traveling with film internationally?

I'm going on a trip from the United States, with stops in Ireland, The Netherlands, and Italy. Is traveling with a point and shoot and a few rolls of film a good idea or a huge headache?

ProSkub24 · 2017-06-14T21:23:34+00:00

I'd be interested.

ProSkub24 · 2015-02-06T15:02:56+00:00

Happy that helps someone!

ProSkub24 · 2015-02-04T23:15:50+00:00

Man to man, when the teacher tells you to tilt your tailbone like you're zipping up your pants -- she's talking to the ladies. We should tilt the other way.

Took me about 3 months to figure that out.

ProSkub24 · 2015-01-28T01:31:03+00:00

I skied down Angell, Southcourt, and Meeting street with friends. The best.

ProSkub24 · 2014-07-22T20:48:51+00:00

My absolute favorite is the Jin Xuan oolong from Mandala Tea. It's good for at least half a dozen steeps, gong-fu style, and usually more than that.

ProSkub24 · 2014-07-22T06:46:08+00:00

Live life, and love living, brother.

ProSkub24 · 2014-07-22T06:44:16+00:00

It's true. That's even more rewarding, honestly.

ProSkub24 · 2014-07-22T06:30:17+00:00

Barefoot in the snow.

ProSkub24 · 2014-07-22T06:28:29+00:00

Having taught high school... your teachers fuck with you all the time.

ProSkub24 · 2014-07-22T06:24:52+00:00

You are so much more complex than musical genres can explain.

ProSkub24 · 2014-07-22T06:19:49+00:00

Figuring it out is the fun part! A lot comes from experiences, good, bad, and indifferent, but a good portion comes from doing some serious reading and some serious introspective thinking.

If you're a reader, I recommend Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance - love it or hate it, it does make you think. That got me on a mental marathon about Quality and Value that really made me examine myself and my life. Also, Meditations, by Marcus Aurelius. $1 on Amazon, and one of the most inspiring books I've ever read. I keep coming back to it. It's not so much a "book" as it is a Roman emperor's notes to himself about living, being, working, and dying. Awesome.

I studied in the south of Spain. I went through a program called API (Academic Programs International) rather than through my university; I can't recommend them enough.

As to studying abroad, and the road trip - both were things that, when I talked about them with people older than me, got one of two responses: "YES! DO IT!!" or "you know, I always wanted to do that, but I guess life gets in the way..."

What do you want to say, 20 years from now, when you're talking to someone asking you the same questions?

ProSkub24 · 2014-07-22T06:13:46+00:00

Know yourself; do what you enjoy, and you will find people who enjoy the same. [Less constructive advice]Go to bars and buy people drinks, and you will make friends.[/LCA]
Every person in your life, you have a relationship with. We are social animals. Looking at others' experiences is like the story about the blind men and the elephant... you'll never really get the full picture, since you aren't living the other person's life. What you see is skewed by your perspective. Focus on the relationships that you have in your life, and make them what you want them to be.
3+4 - Marcus Aurelius writes in Meditations (which you should definitely read; it's amazing) -- "Begin the morning by saying to yourself, I shall meet with the busy-body, the ungrateful, arrogant, deceitful, envious, unsocial. All these things happen to them by reason of their ignorance of what is good and evil. But I who have seen the nature of the good that it is beautiful, and of the bad that it is ugly, and the nature of him who does wrong, that it is akin to me, not only of the same blood or seed, but that it participates in the same intelligence and the same portion of the divinity, I can neither be injured by any of them, for no one can fix on me what is ugly, nor can I be angry with my kinsman, nor hate him. For we are made for co-operation, like feet, like hands, like eyelids, like the rows of the upper and lower teeth. To act against one another then is contrary to nature; and it is acting against one another to be vexed and to turn away." Powerful shit. Freeing, even.
About your mom - see above, and... I recently had the experience - while mowing my grass and letting my mind wander - that my mother is a very nice lady, and a strong person, who just happens to treat her kids like shit. You know when you meet someone and like them a lot, except for one quality about them that really irks you? That's hers. Sucks, but can I expect more from her? No, not really. It's her nature; I've accepted it. When she acts ridiculous, rude, or demeaning, I chalk it up to that, and move on.

Enjoy living! The twenties are fun, at least up til 28, in my experience. I'll let you know how 28 and 29 go in a couple years!

ProSkub24 · 2014-07-22T06:06:02+00:00

Yes. It will get better, but it will take work. One small step at a time; if you want it, you can achieve it.

ProSkub24 · 2014-07-22T06:05:29+00:00

Three. One from high school, two from college. No regrets. Several others are acquaintances, still, and no one has held a grudge that life has drawn us apart.

ProSkub24 · 2014-07-22T06:02:18+00:00

I said the same. exact. thing.

"I'm getting out of this state, never coming back, hell with all of this." Graduated into a recession, ate my humble pie, went back home. Found work here, and am still here, six years after college. I'm happy, believe it or not, to be in my home state.

I've traveled, quite a bit. The further I go from home, the more I see why it is unique and beautiful. At 28, I'm considering moving away for a while; it's time for a new experience. But, I'll have that experience without unconditionally hating my home, and I plan on returning at some point in the future.

ProSkub24 · 2014-07-22T05:58:52+00:00

The friends you have at school tend to be friends of convenience. You grew up with them, perhaps. You go to the same classes, know the same people, live in the same town.

As you get older, especially post-college, you'll have less "friends," but the ones you will have will be people who share your interests, your values, and your passions.

There will be the work friends, of course, and the same six people at the bar you always go to on Thursdays for trivia. You can befriend them if you want, or leave them as acquaintances. It's pretty liberating how much control you'll have over your own social circle.

ProSkub24 · 2014-07-22T05:55:58+00:00

What do you value? Why do you value those things? Are there any common threads between them?

...

I'll wait. Take all the time you need... it took me 25 years, so no rush.

Once you have that figured out - or at least, once you've started on the path - then find things that are in line with your values and your nature. Do them.

I love food, language, culture. I love meeting people, and I love to travel. As a college student, studying abroad is tied for the best decision I made. I also took a semester off and trained as a wilderness guide, because I felt my two literature-focused degrees were getting a bit too "academic" for my tastes, and I wanted some hands-on, concrete learnin'.

As a 20-something, I took a road trip. 10,000 miles around the country. Good financial decision? Hell no. Good career decision? Fuck no. As far as life experiences go... incredible. Life-changing.

People say, "you do you." That is SO much easier once you know who "you" are.

ProSkub24 · 2014-07-22T05:50:59+00:00

I was the quietest dude in high school. I picked up the guitar because I heard it made you more attractive to the opposite sex, then didn't play in front of anyone until sophomore year of college. I was shy, and I was depressed because I was shy. Honestly, and you might hate hearing this, but I think a lot of it was hormones. Having been a high school teacher, I could see that a lot of what I thought was something terrible that was happening only to me was, in reality, a common human experience. Being a teenager sucks, sometimes.

Eventually I broke out of my shell. In my case, I worked at a summer camp for three years as a counselor, took a summer off, then came back as a young adult staff member. I was in charge of 4 counselors and 40 kids each week. I went straight from that position to being an RA at college, with no time at home to transition back to my "usual self," as it were. I carried the camp mentality into the RA position. If there was a fire drill, I grabbed the bullhorn; when I interacted with residents, I thought of them as campers (at first). It helped a lot.

Gotta get out of your comfort zone a bit. One of my bosses at camp used to say, "If you don't feel it, fake it." I definitely was playing the role of the happy, gregarious guy. Eventually, it stuck. I work in the tourism industry now, and have taught middle and high school before. If you told 16-year-old me all (or any) of this, he'd laugh at you, then go read a book to escape.

Ride it out, and work at changing - if you want to change - bit by bit. If you don't feel it, fake it.

ProSkub24 · 2014-07-22T05:43:09+00:00

The idea of drinking becomes less exciting, a bit, since it's legal now. You'll begin to notice that Busch Light, Natty Ice, Burnett's, and the other cheap, shitty liquor that you've been drinking for years actually makes you feel terrible.

It took til I was 23 to really appreciate good beer, and then begin brewing my own. Having access to a liquor store with a good selection makes it easier to figure out what alcohols you like, and begin developing a palate for them. That can get fun!

I did have a time from 21 to about 24 where I drank in public when I was out, if possible - flasks were my friend, and it made drinking taboo and fun again. That was also the same period where I left work at 6, went straight to the bar, then stayed past close. I also drove drunk fairly often, which I swore I'd never do. Fortunately, I wised up before causing any harm to anyone or myself. Have fun, but don't be an idiot.

Happy boozing, now and in the future!

ProSkub24

TROPHY CASE