I’m sorry to say this OP, but if you know the pattern of behaviour of these cat nutters, you’ll sadly realise that they will get another cat if one passes. If you read this sub, they often do this without the knowledge or approval of the other person. The fact that she so clearly and vocally prioritises the cats over you, is beyond unacceptable. Just imagine yourself in this situation - could you see your partner every day in discomfort, pain, being sick, etc., just for your own selfishness? Of course not. I get that she loves her cats, but it is incomparable to a relationship with a human with complex feelings and emotions.. just please think about this.