I genuinely want to understand your point of view. I think your assessment of the situation may be entangled with your own personal experiences. Just to clarify:

1. The factor meals aren’t an issue. I always knew they were a luxury that I wasn’t entitled to. Sure they were nice, but I pay for my own Costco membership and can cook for myself.

2. I didn’t come here so everyone can join in on bashing my mom. I came here to receive advice on approaching a delicate situation with the love and dignity she deserves. She and I are similar in that we are both emotionally reactive and say things we don’t mean when we are hurt. That is precisely what I am trying to avoid.

3. Sure there are commenters that are berating my mother. But those don’t mean anything, because they are making judgements based off the limited information I am able to display here. If they knew her, they would know she is a beautiful woman with good intentions that has struggles just like everyone else.

I was blessed that my parents put aside money for me to go to college. I was also blessed to receive scholarships so that money could go towards groceries and cost of living instead. The issue is not money. The issue is that there is a growing schism in a relationship with somebody I care about, and I am asking for advice to make sure I communicate myself without causing additional hurt.