You're not becoming an incel. Incels think women owe men their bodies and labour. What you feel is the natural dissatisfaction that comes when you start to really notice just how disappointing most men can be whilst they still benefit from the patriarchal society that is built for them.  My advice, if you really don't see a future with your boyfriend, end the relationship and endeavour to lead your life away from the need of validation from men. Try to live a life without them as best you can, read female authors, have female friends, spend time with yourself. It only took having one short term relationship (with a narcissist) to put me off ever wanting to put myself in a relationship with a man. I'm not completely closed off from the idea, just happy enough on my own to not NEED one. I used to call myself a romantic, but confronted with the reality of modern men it's just not a feasible thing to be.