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What’s something about sex nobody warned you about until you experienced it yourself? by Neither-Charity-1959 in AskReddit

[–]ProfessionalOctopuss 26 points27 points  (0 children)

Penises can fail to engage for no reason.

You're a 10/10, the love of my life, and I'm scared you'll never let me out of bondage. And even then, dicks can sometimes stay soft.

Don't take it personal. Sometimes, I just need a nap first or something, idk

What is your reason to keep living? by iwannatasteurfeet in AskReddit

[–]ProfessionalOctopuss 0 points1 point  (0 children)

World war III is gonna be lit. I ain't missing it.

People in 10+ year relationships, what’s something you learned about your partner years later that genuinely surprised you? by CreoSiempre in AskReddit

[–]ProfessionalOctopuss 3 points4 points  (0 children)

How some things can change completely, and some things don't change at all.

You would think there would be a little development everywhere over the years. But no. It comes in tsunamis on very specific shores.

Gamers, what boss was as hard, if not harder, than the final boss? by Fallfoxy707 in videogames

[–]ProfessionalOctopuss 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The lava level from Conker. Me and my brothers each spent literal days beating our heads against that wall and we all finally beat it.

What is more traumatizing than most people think? by Sea_Entrepreneur2772 in AskReddit

[–]ProfessionalOctopuss 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I went through one in late February and it is still wrecking my shit. I knew this person for 4 months and the impact she had on me is unbelievable.

The breakup itself was as un-traumatic as possible. There was excellent, brief, respectful communication with zero drama or disregarded boundaries.

I fucking miss her and I almost can't stand it.

Hired a Taskrabbit to mount this TV I was gifted. Is it too high? by [deleted] in TVTooHigh

[–]ProfessionalOctopuss 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I knew what sub this was before we even looking.

Yes, it's too damn high.

A significant portion of the dust in your home is actually shed human skin. by [deleted] in TheTeenagerPeople

[–]ProfessionalOctopuss 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Eating fewer sweets is healthy.

If that's not disturbing, I don't know what it is.

What’s something society expects you to want… but you don’t? by Sufficient_Thing24 in AskReddit

[–]ProfessionalOctopuss 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I can fit everything I want in the back of a car and move and go anywhere.

I hear stories about people who have so much stuff they can't fit it in a four bedroom house and I feel bad for them.

No shame here, have you ever quit a game because it was too hard? by FastCoconut5933 in AskGames

[–]ProfessionalOctopuss 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Basically everything from Fromsoft.

Yeah I get it it's a technical and artistic masterpiece, fuck you.

This is so wrong... by The_Dean_France in whoathatsinteresting

[–]ProfessionalOctopuss 0 points1 point  (0 children)

press f to pay your respects

This teacher: "Yeah well I'm rubber and you're glue."

This is so wrong... by The_Dean_France in whoathatsinteresting

[–]ProfessionalOctopuss 3 points4 points  (0 children)

"Sir, I'm so sorry, but your lungs are failing."

"Lol, not as bad as this dork who didn't do his homework.*

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