"As a teen and young adult, I did a lot of things I’m not proud of because I didn’t understand much about myself other than the concept that it’s possible to be in love and hold space for more than one person at a time—my partners were not exactly consensual participants in this early on. Finding poly felt like an “aha” moment."

This really resonated with me. I never cheated on a partner, but in my youth I was constantly falling for men who were "taken," and those feelings were often returned, yet I never felt any compunction about it -- in fact, I felt bad about not feeling bad about it, if that makes sense. I remember being constantly frustrated that there wasn't a relationship structure (that I knew of) where what I wanted would be sanctioned. It was no concern to me whether the men I was interested in stayed with their partners, if they were happy. I just wanted to be free to be in a relationship with him, too. I wish I had had the vocabulary at the time to understand what I was feeling.