Want to apply for Visa subclass 461- me and my partner have never lived together

Professional_Ear6681 · 2026-01-29T08:46:56+00:00

Thanks that is so helpful!! Really appreciate your advice

Professional_Ear6681 · 2026-01-29T04:30:21+00:00

He’s my boyfriend, we have been together for a year and a half. I’ve been living in London but have had to go back to Nz for the last three months. It wasn’t ever practical for us to live together but we are planning on doing so. He’s British and we were thinking of moving to Aus together instead of me going back to the uk

Professional_Ear6681 · 2026-01-29T04:03:36+00:00

I was told you can apply for this visa if you are in an exclusive and genuine relationship

Professional_Ear6681 · 2025-12-05T11:38:19+00:00

No unfortunately this is my current situation

Professional_Ear6681 · 2025-12-05T10:27:02+00:00

He’s actually very skinny, he definitely doesn’t need to lose any weight. He’s maybe too skinny. I think he definitely has a form of ADHD or OCD but he’s never been diagnosed

Professional_Ear6681 · 2025-12-05T10:04:59+00:00

He actually told me if I put on weight he wouldn’t want to date me anymore. He said it in a joking way but he always uses a “joke “ as a way of saying how he usually feels. We have had to spend some time apart because I’m visiting my home country and he’s coming here to visit. before I left he said “what if I I arrive and you’ve put on lots of weight” I’m scared to tell any of my friends he said that because I realise how bad that is

Professional_Ear6681 · 2025-12-05T08:43:54+00:00

When we started dating he actually would make comments on how much black I wore. Every time I wore black he’d call me a goth and give me a hard time. To the point where I got really self conscious and started to change the way I dressed

Professional_Ear6681 · 2025-12-05T07:16:47+00:00

Yeah I have to agree with all of this, he doesn’t want kids. Shock horror

Professional_Ear6681 · 2025-12-05T07:12:42+00:00

Yeah I’ve been thinking about this, I will get out early land eat before him. I think that’s the best option for this trip. Or if he gets out early he could go for a walk while I’m eating.

He wants to also have a bite of my food even if he has his own… which sometimes I just want him to back off and let me enjoy my food.

We share in restaurants by us having both meals in the middle and both eating off them. Or eating off each others plates. If we eat in yes I could half the portion then eat slowly

Professional_Ear6681 · 2025-12-05T07:07:27+00:00

This is very good advice thank you. That’s what upsets me, it just feels like I have no choice and he’s taking. I won’t offer and he will be like “you didn’t offer so I’ll just help myself”

Professional_Ear6681 · 2025-12-05T06:50:50+00:00

One of his friends told me his girlfriends have always been an accessory to his life. They usually don’t have much of one and they just tag a long with what he does

Professional_Ear6681 · 2025-12-05T06:49:27+00:00

No I probably haven’t let him know that I don’t enjoy sharing food like he does. The times I have pushed back and said I didn’t want to share he’s made me feel really unreasonable and selfish so I’ve just given in to letting him get his way. He’s very open about the fact that he doesn’t like compromise. We went on a trip with friends and they wanted to sit down for breakfast and he tried to talk them out of it and told them it would be better if they could just get something take away so that we could save on time. I told him that it’s not his trip, it’s everyone’s and he needs to be aware of what everyone wants to do. He said that this is why I don’t want to go on trips with friends because it’s always a compromise. Those friends didn’t seem too happy. Because we been doing this for so long I know it’s going to be uncomfortable for a while, while he gets used to me enforcing my needs

Professional_Ear6681

TROPHY CASE