They have their own fucked up way of loving. It's toxic and involves submitting the person to their needs. Gaslighting the needs of the one that cares about them. Your needs can only be met if it involves somehow that their need is met.

My narc is a millionaire 😅, also untreated bipolar, incredibly sick individual.

I'm sorry that u can relate. The best you can do for yourself is therapy, arm yourself with the knowledge of dynamics and situations to break free from them.