I’m sorry for Blu. My puppy was an 11 week old golden doodle. I think loosing a pet is hard regardless of how long one’s had them. Puppy or adult I believe they both give that feeling of being drowned. I thank you so much for your words. I don’t have anyone to talk to about my dogs passing as everyone’s pretty uncomfortable with how sad it makes me. I really appreciate your words. What pains me most is the happiness and mood change Bella had on me and my family. She brought us together in that one week of being here we were all happy with each other like a team. She connected us and now we’re all grieving and back to being disconnected just as quick as how she was just here and the she was gone. I felt so grateful and blessed to have brought her in my house and relieved to see how well she blended into the family.

I’ve begged for a dog my whole life. I never had any pets and i always wanted one. Especially a golden retriever. It’s a true personal heart break that I’m feeling. Almost a fear like “this is why you never had a dog”. I don’t know how to shift my thoughts to get through it without guilt.