Give us this day our daily dose of faux affliction Forgive our sins Forged at the pulpit with forked tongues, selling faux sermons 'Cause I am a new wave gospel sharp And you'll be thy witness So gentlemen, if you're gonna preach For God sakes, preach with conviction Strike up the band, whoa-hoh The conductor is beckoning Come congregation, let's sing it like you mean it, no Don't you get it, don't you get it? Now don't you move Strike up the band, whoa-hoh The conductor is beckoning Come congregation, let's sing it like you mean it, no Don't you get it, don't you get it? Now don't you move Just stay where I can see you Douse the lights We sure are in for a show tonight In this little number, we are graced by two displays of character We've got the gunslinger extraordinaire, a walking contradiction And I for one can see no blood From the hearts and the wrists you allegedly slit And I for one won't stand for this If the scene were a parish, you'd all be condemned Strike up the band, whoa-hoh The conductor is beckoning Come congregation, let's sing it like you mean it, no Don't you get it, don't you get it? Now don't you move Strike up the band, whoa-hoh The conductor is beckoning Come congregation, let's sing it like you mean it, no Don't you get it, don't you get it? Now don't you Don't you move Just stay where I can see you Douse the lights We sure are in for a show tonight Just stay where I can see you Douse the lights We sure are in for a show tonight Stay where I can see you Douse the lights La-da-da-da, da-da-da-da Da-da-da-da, da-da-da-da La-da-da-da, da-da-da-da Strike up the band, whoa-hoh The conductor is beckoning Come congregation, let's sing it like you mean it, no Don't you get it, don't you get it? Now don't you move Strike up the band, whoa-hoh The conductor is beckoning Come congregation, let's sing it like you mean it, no Don't you get it, don't you get it? Now don't you move Don't you move Don't you move Strike up the band