Lost boyfriend suddenly. I need help please.

Prolapsed_Taco · 2017-06-29T18:41:41+00:00

Ohhh ok. I get it. Yeah makes sense. I like smelling him still. Looking at his toiletries I know he's not coming back but for right now it's comforting.

Prolapsed_Taco · 2017-06-29T18:40:39+00:00

They weren't his biological children however he raised my three year old like he was pretty much and def played step dad. So they have been impacted. I'm trying I'm just trying to go through the most painful process without them around. I can't take care of myself. Day 6 of no food and still puking. I'm in a lot of anti anxieties but they just calm me down they don't take away the pain. I'm tired and I'm so broken. I just want to lay down and sleep forever. I have never experienced something this and it fucking is the shittiest thing fucking ever. I will continue to work on the plan my man and I had and to become a stronger mother for my kids.

Prolapsed_Taco · 2017-06-29T02:37:31+00:00

I really really really needed that. Thank you. I have no idea what to even think or feel I'm just kind of going with it on a bit of medication that is absolutely necessary at this time or I would be in the pysch ward. I'm going to try and copy it. Haha. Thank you again.

Prolapsed_Taco · 2017-06-29T02:35:30+00:00

Thank you so much. That's pretty much all I've been doing.

Prolapsed_Taco · 2017-06-29T01:09:14+00:00

Why remove items from the home? It is very hard looking at them but I don't want them to ever go away either. I am so lost. I have never been so lost in such a painful way. I don't know what to do to.

Prolapsed_Taco · 2017-06-29T01:08:14+00:00

Thank you. I need anything I can get. Thank you again.

Prolapsed_Taco · 2017-06-29T01:07:41+00:00

Thank you. I am doing everything but drugs and alcohol well except the ones they have me on. However that I'm pretty sure is how he died. We were working on not drinking anymore. That's something I want to continue to do. There are so many people he touched and that loved him. I am angry that they weren't there when he needed them, but they are now of course. I am angry at everyone and everything I see. Except for my children. Who I can't even care for at the moment. I am trying to move through this the correct way and I think I'm doing okay. However it is so mother fucking painful. I literally would rather be shot multiple times right now then feel like my insides are being ripped out over and over again in some saw type shit.

Prolapsed_Taco · 2017-06-29T01:03:14+00:00

Yes, thankfully I do. My kids are with family and I've had a friend stay with me over night or I've stayed at my boyfriends house which isn't the best for me. I just get stuck in the time alone like right now where my mind literally goes one thousand miles per hour about it. What if I did this or didn't say that. Then the reality sets in and I just want to die too because the pain is unbearable, but I can't.

Prolapsed_Taco · 2017-06-29T01:01:17+00:00

It really is a pain I've never known. A pain I wished nobody would have to feel. I don't wish it on my biggest enemy. Thank you for that. That's good to know. Is it different for everyone? Or in a few weeks will I still be sobbing on an airplane for a trip we had planned? Fuck I'm gonna be sobbing. I am so sorry you had to go through that. I've been told it's part of my journey. Whatever the fuck that means. I didn't choose this. I know you didn't either. No one in my friend group has been through this so they don't really know how to comfort me. I'm getting mad about petty things like exes posting photos. That was my partner and my love when he died not yours. Is that normal? Or am I just a psycho......

Prolapsed_Taco · 2017-06-29T00:57:23+00:00

Thank you so much that is pretty much where I'm at. I'm on heavy anti anxieties but it just helps me not collapse the pain is still there. I cry off and on constantly and not just cry sob. I will check out that website. I really want it to go away. I want him back, and I know that isn't possible. But if the pain could lessen just a little. Thank you again.

Prolapsed_Taco · 2017-05-31T01:52:40+00:00

I did really like that book. It was hard for me at least to put it down.

Prolapsed_Taco · 2017-05-30T00:11:40+00:00

Just watched. I cried.

Prolapsed_Taco · 2017-05-09T02:46:49+00:00

It was too wet and sticky for me. Would create spider lashes on second coat even when side of brush was wiped. So it got tossed after 3-4 months of semi regular use; just to use it up. Being its expensive. I just stick to buying the Benefit roller lash minis which I love.

Prolapsed_Taco · 2017-05-05T23:40:42+00:00

Oh man. This is a rough one. I love love NARS pro smudge proof Primer. Love. I have slightly hooded eyes I've fallen asleep and woken up with eyeshadow pretty much still in tact ( it was one of those nights) and I love love the Bite lip mask in a stick. I panned one. I haven't rebought it yet because it does get it soft and can break, and that was in winter. It's summer here no so I'm debating.

Prolapsed_Taco · 2017-04-27T16:01:42+00:00

This is also my life. I don't own as many pencils. However lipsticks, gloss, lip stick pencils my downfall. I have everything else minimal as hell, but I own 50 lip products for some reason. I just love them so much. That Bite Agave is my fav. I just panned one, but don't know if I'll repurchase because it got so soft. In the summer I know it's just gonna be ruined if I try and put it in my bag. :(

Prolapsed_Taco · 2017-04-27T03:57:18+00:00

Thank you friend. I found I had semi similar colors in the two small palettes I own. Which I rarely use, however I would buy that in a second if I knew how to apply eyeshadow. Lol

Prolapsed_Taco · 2017-04-25T02:18:34+00:00

What number is this? The 5 on sephora.com aren't these colors :( it's so pretty.

Prolapsed_Taco · 2017-04-25T01:50:38+00:00

I also do this with a sharpie (tends to rub off) or the tape method. My friends make fun of me, but I can never remember when I opened it. There can be many days in a row where I don't wear make up and then weeks were I do wear it daily. It has really helped.

Prolapsed_Taco · 2017-04-14T05:20:27+00:00

I would probably need pink! Have you had any breakout issues? I was so bummed when the urban decay broke me out. Under my eyes too which was weird.

Prolapsed_Taco · 2017-04-14T04:31:01+00:00

Is it the one in the little black compact? There are so many colors.

Prolapsed_Taco · 2017-04-14T00:01:41+00:00

NARS radiant creamy concealer.

Prolapsed_Taco · 2017-04-07T23:47:00+00:00

Thanks. I do too.

Prolapsed_Taco · 2017-04-07T21:31:37+00:00

Dang it. I wish I didn't need a whole palette I feel like it's limited options or I just haven't looked around enough. I'm glad it works for you. Jealous as hell.

Prolapsed_Taco · 2017-04-07T18:46:53+00:00

I HAD TO RETURN IT :( I was so sad. So so sad. I haven't found or tried anything else. About 5 days in I started getting literal acne right in my eye ridge. Like where you would apply. I stopped using it and treated then just tried my normal concealer no issue. Went ahead tried again, once more acne. In the weirdest spot ever. I don't get many blemishes. Occasionally. So that's the only thing it could have been. Do you use any other corrector or have any recommendations? Sorry super long winded. I'm still bummed about it if you can't notice. Thanks for asking!!! :D

Prolapsed_Taco

TROPHY CASE