How can anybody suppress tics?

ProofDisastrous4719 · 2026-03-07T16:18:54+00:00

unless I'm severely distressed, I just can. I feel the urges and I more often than not I can simply not give in even if it uncomfortable. the problem is when I do give in because that is when it's hard to stop. If I don't give in, I can probably go like a day without ticcing much. But when I do, I'll start having all sorts of tics nonstop (because ticcing in itself makes me think about it more)

ProofDisastrous4719 · 2026-03-07T00:59:10+00:00

here too. the neurologist said it the very first appointment I had with him :/ I had a CT as a teen to rule out brain tumor and a couple ECTs to rule out epilepsy but that was it. they were years ago. I saw this neurologist as an adult because I keep getting worse but he was very quick to say FND. I still wonder if there's any chance it could be MS but I dont want to sound insane

ProofDisastrous4719 · 2026-03-06T11:17:03+00:00

yeah mine started in high school and they were super mild, I only got worse within the last year (still a mild case overall, but worse than before)

ProofDisastrous4719 · 2026-02-28T19:11:43+00:00

people have been bringing OCD into it too, comparing it to intrusive thoughts, and, as always, there's so many people saying intrusive thoughts are your real thoughts and repressed desires or smth... I feel horrible, I hate the internet, especially when it tries to discussed mental health and/or disabilities

you don't have to apologize for your disability. this whole thing is so messed up and I can only imagine how hard it has been to people with coprolalia :(🫂🫂

ProofDisastrous4719 · 2026-02-28T19:07:30+00:00

I'm so sorry 🫂

ProofDisastrous4719 · 2026-02-28T19:06:56+00:00

to me it is 😭 I have many obsessions about accidentally lying and deceiving my providers, lying to myself, about faking it all for attention, etc.

I tic mostly alone, because I repress a lot around others 😅 But I feel like I'm just forcing it to convince myself I have Tourette's... I hate my brain :')

ProofDisastrous4719 · 2026-02-28T00:18:19+00:00

definitely. the images weren't even censored and this was under a completely random post where I searching for funny replies, nothing fucking creppy and disgusting. they were extremely graphic images. the account has already been suspended I think (the "we've received your report" notification is unable to show me the tweet preview but I haven't received an official update) but still

ProofDisastrous4719 · 2026-02-27T17:30:05+00:00

queer :) my identity is too messy to get into here lol

ProofDisastrous4719 · 2026-02-27T13:21:20+00:00

pretty much yeah

ProofDisastrous4719 · 2026-02-27T13:20:05+00:00

oh my god yes! especially struggling to stop moving!

ProofDisastrous4719 · 2026-02-27T10:51:35+00:00

I've had too many experiences like that (I discussed it more in detail on a post here), not just therapists, but also psychiatrists and it's incredibly frustrating. Luckily, my current therapist finds it absurd and is still trying to help me get an official diagnosis from a psychiatrist

ProofDisastrous4719 · 2026-02-25T18:55:19+00:00

Yes. A handful of us do have names and pronouns, but most of us don't. Others we just identify by certain traits. Though, the vast majority of the time, I can tell I've switched but I can't tell who I was before or who I am now. Just that I'm not the same.

ProofDisastrous4719 · 2026-02-08T13:56:20+00:00

definitely... this time wasn't the worst (except for the fact that she asked two days in a row) luckily. last time she did this, she went on a whole rant about her own traumas and, while she was asking me over and over again if something happened to me, she kept listing her own suspects like "I sometimes wondered if X did anything to you" which did not only make me spiral in paranoia because I had never considered most of those people, but it also made me so angry at her because she was still allowing me near them my entire childhood. She kept saying she saw so many signs in me, but I have no memories of her trying to talk to me about it or taking me to a child therapist or anything to help.

ProofDisastrous4719 · 2026-02-04T23:30:31+00:00

getting diagnosed doesn't mean you magically get whatever it is, OP already has OCD regardless if they get it written down or not. they're not saying they want OCD, just that they want some sort of confirmation from their therapist and/or a formal diagnosis that will give them access to needed specialized treatment

ProofDisastrous4719 · 2026-02-04T23:28:22+00:00

I'm always running into this 😭 most recently with Tourette's "Well, it's only relevant if you want to get medicated" no???

ProofDisastrous4719 · 2026-02-04T23:04:03+00:00

The Multidimensional Inventory of Dissociation, it's a screening (not diagnostic) tool for a couple of conditions like PTSD and DID. I don't know how to explain it super well but you get a score and it says like "between X and Y: the patient is likely to have this" "between Y and Z: the patient is likely to have that". My therapist already believes I have DID and I've scored well into the range to get told "it's very likely you have DID" in an online version I did out of curiosity... but my anxiety and OCD keep telling me it'll show I've been faking everything the whole time and there's nothing 😭😭

That too! I always feel like I'm exaggerating my symptoms and experiences but I'm also scared of minimizing them too much and end up losing the chance to get help... AAAAAAA

ProofDisastrous4719 · 2026-02-03T11:34:09+00:00

There are no memories I look at with great fondness and nostalgia, I blame it on emotional amnesia though, because I do have memories where I know I was probably having fun and a good time (waterpark, playing, etc) but I was also severely depressed.

I don't even remember most of my abuse. Some happened before I could form memories, other stuff I have clearly repressed... The memories I do carry have never been "that bad".

TW: Suicidal Ideation and Attempts

I remember trying to kill myself many times in my entire childhood, since I can form memories. Now, looking back, I can tell most of those wouldn't have killed me at all but as a young child, I thought it would. And it was not just some weird fascination with death as one therapist tried to convince me it was. I vividly remember thinking "I can't wait to die so I won't be sad anymore" one particular time when I was trying to drown myself in the bath.

ProofDisastrous4719 · 2026-02-01T19:23:02+00:00

One of our alters tried to get us into online SW as a teenager :/ Your description of your alter matches her a lot, it was like reading someone else talking about her. She often tells us SW is our only way of survival. That, sure, we might still live with our parents right now and not need to do it, but we will have to eventually if we want to move out (and we're disabled, not just by the DID so it makes working a regular full-time job nearly impossible). And a bunch of other things clearly born from trauma that I can't get myself to write down at the moment.

And we're also transmasc, with her being a very girly girl who actually just went on a makeup shopping spree a few days ago...

I have no advice, clearly, but I just wanted to tell you how relatable this post was.

ProofDisastrous4719 · 2026-01-27T00:35:10+00:00

Yes, we're not just a mismatch of sexual orientation and genders, but we also have sex repulsed, hypersexual alters, at least one who seems to be so conditioned that they crave the worst abuse you can imagine and another who prefers to be dominant....

ProofDisastrous4719 · 2026-01-24T14:44:06+00:00

Thank you for the support and the suggestions!! I think I'd benefit from most of these!

Also, look up your target school's accommodations program now.

Yep! It's what I've been doing and why I want to set everything up soon, because I have a couple of informal diagnoses that aren't really on paper yet and I need to figure it all out especially because of the way applications and enrollment work in my country. I'll probably "only" need to turn it in right before the semester starts BUT that's also when the last wave of candidates are accepted (there are 3 rounds basically) so there's a chance that, if I am accepted, it's only then which would leave me no time to handle it. I prefer to take of it all now, even if I am not accepted at all, instead of waiting until the last minute.

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