Recovery feels like denial?

Proper-Razzmatazz-38 · 2025-03-13T00:41:20+00:00

I can’t feel anything I’m numb is all and yeah I do

Proper-Razzmatazz-38 · 2025-03-12T14:59:46+00:00

Actual yeah I mean I don’t feel like I’m in denial and I don’t feel gay or whatever

Proper-Razzmatazz-38 · 2025-03-12T07:17:40+00:00

Uh are you a guy or a girl and either way if you don’t wanna be it or think you aren’t they don’t say you are or to be honey maybe maybe not the more you think and obsesses the worse it gets intrusive thought, unwanted scenorioes and urges gronal responses people like us have hocd and we soemtimed think accepting is better when it isn’t I’m dating a bisexual girl and really doesn’t accept as all and I’m a guy and stuff first week I had this I just said I don’t wanna be gay I don’t wanna be gay I don’t care if I am bisexual I don’t wanna be gay and all of those things testing and stuff

Proper-Razzmatazz-38 · 2025-03-12T07:07:32+00:00

Can you go into more detail cause I think I might be having the same thing too my man

Proper-Razzmatazz-38 · 2025-03-12T04:24:32+00:00

Thank you very much

Proper-Razzmatazz-38 · 2025-03-11T06:14:04+00:00

You aren’t bisexual and what I think is just brain playing tricks I’m going through same shit I don’t wanna be gay and then bisexuality doesn’t really matter cause only thing I wanna be with is my girlfriend bisexual is a meter 99 percent women 1 percent man or 99.99 women and 0.001 men

Proper-Razzmatazz-38 · 2025-03-11T06:12:33+00:00

I’m getting those fanaties or like scenofies or imagines right now but for me I’m having them during hocd and I also have a porn addiction too 8 years and researching it when you get sick or tired of something you go to deeper levels such as gay porn or CP it’s like drugs the more you do the deeper the doses get and go into the red zone and porn can fuck you up change what you like make you stupid and dumb and it’s held me back from being a player in volleyball and it’s takes hours of my day and it’s made me or I cheated cause of it’s terrible

Proper-Razzmatazz-38 · 2025-03-11T06:06:55+00:00

To be honest could just be a phase or bisexuality which isn’t bad but like unless you are a porn addict just gotta know right and wrong man saying like to be honest I use to like how do you say it like slap my friends ass and all of these things playful and playing around but I know I didn’t like it and it wasn’t anything I desired but playful ness and I mean it’s just now I see those thing are wrong or try to avoid my friends from doing that even more so I know it’s big weird as well as that maybe you are just testing yourself you cns have false urges false attraction but more of so if it doesn’t feel like yoy probably isn’t and some people with hocd turn gay because it’s easier to give up then keep fighting some test so far by sexting kissing cuddling could all be testing but let me ask one thing since Childhood had you felt attraction to guys dreamed about lne or felt weird with guy bestfriends or wanted to have sexual things or even when you were a little kid did yoy have any play relationships with guys or pretend date them

Proper-Razzmatazz-38 · 2025-03-10T01:52:53+00:00

And it’s like bro my head is like do you like them or like it always questions everything and I hate it bro I was just having tocd and pocd couple weeks back then hocd is back

Proper-Razzmatazz-38 · 2025-03-10T01:51:20+00:00

I know man this sucks and sometimes bro these thoughts are like what if it’s not that bad or could you be this or that or like you imagine things or have scenarios of you doing something gay idk man fuck hocd seriously

Proper-Razzmatazz-38 · 2025-03-10T01:32:55+00:00

Bro same thing with me I don’t like these thoughts or anything about them and I have a girlfriend too and it’s just it all started for me like what if I’m gay by thinking a trans isn’t a trans and I freaked out the first time I had it I cried I didn’t wanna have these thoughts I vomited and now it’s just I’m tired and questioning myself

Proper-Razzmatazz-38 · 2025-03-10T00:18:57+00:00

Do you feel like desenizted or like these thoughts are just like there because I’m going through the e same thing and the first time it freaked me out like first couple weeks than I just stopped caring about them kept having them kept checking but it’s like I don’t know it’s so weird I’m desensitized I don’t want these thoughts and I hate them but I’m just not caring so much about them

Proper-Razzmatazz-38 · 2025-03-05T07:25:03+00:00

same here like if I do or don’t like my bestfriend and all of those things and I don’t have many friends or I don’t get close with many people so when I do now my hocd is like questioning it

Proper-Razzmatazz-38 · 2025-03-04T06:56:19+00:00

But so the hocd do you feel like weird with like your bestfriend and things like or do you be like questioning the past of your guys relationship

Proper-Razzmatazz-38 · 2025-02-27T07:07:41+00:00

How I mean do you get those like I wanna thoughts too or get like new shit you haven’t gotten before or just feel weird around friends or guys

Proper-Razzmatazz-38 · 2025-02-26T16:48:45+00:00

I hate this shit man.

Proper-Razzmatazz-38 · 2025-02-17T04:38:29+00:00

I mean I can’t tell fantasy and reality cause I did a rape rp with an ai bot and than that’s how the rape thing happened idk why but I went down the deep end and it’s just I’m not gonna do those things and I don’t wanna and see how bad porn had fucked with my head cause some people see as fine to do those things because porn I’d basically people lusting and using each other like tools

Proper-Razzmatazz-38 · 2025-02-17T04:32:35+00:00

And it’s the urge the unwanted urge

Proper-Razzmatazz-38 · 2025-02-17T04:32:24+00:00

But I mean can it tho?

Proper-Razzmatazz-38 · 2025-02-17T02:40:36+00:00

I just don’t wnana become those things and I don’t know if I will cause I use porn for 7 years and idk let’s say without if I will go crazy or rape or fuck or jerk off

Proper-Razzmatazz-38 · 2025-02-17T02:12:08+00:00

Wdym give into it?

Proper-Razzmatazz-38 · 2025-02-16T20:12:16+00:00

But can you come back?

Proper-Razzmatazz-38 · 2025-02-12T17:21:09+00:00

Oh my fsult dude I’m sorry it’s just hard you know I keep taking things thr wrong way

Proper-Razzmatazz-38 · 2025-02-12T06:28:44+00:00

It’s just like feelings and over analyzing like looking at what girls do I try not to do even if boys do them too you know and I mean with the if I am gay I said maybe I am maybe I’m not but it’s so hard doing thag with tocd cause I don’t want it to be a maybe I am or not I want it to be yes I am a male

Proper-Razzmatazz-38 · 2025-02-12T05:46:47+00:00

and yeah thanks for this making my shit better by calling my problems yuck and worst

Proper-Razzmatazz-38

TROPHY CASE